Not Interstate Of Mind

| MA, USA | Extra Stupid, Transportation

Me: “Hello, [store name].”

Customer: “Are you open today?”

Me: “Yes, we’re open until 6 pm.”

Customer: “Can you tell me how to get there?”

Me: “Oh sure, it’s fairly easy. Take I-495 to [exit], go left at the end of the exit ramp, go left at the first light, and we’re just up the hill; you’ll see the sign.”

Customer: “What? I don’t understand.”

Me: “Okay, start out on I-495, and—”

Customer: “What’s that?”

Me: “The… highway? Interstate 495?”

Customer: “How do I get to that?”

Me: “Where are you now?”

Customer: “That doesn’t matter; how do I get to that highway?”

Me: “Well, it depends where you are. What town are you in?”

Customer: “No, just tell me how to get to that highway!”

Me: “I’m sorry, I can’t unless I know where you’re starting from!”

Customer: “Never mind, you’re no help! I may or may not come in later!”

Rangers Triumph Again

| NJ, USA | Bigotry, Geeks Rule, Movies & TV, Theme Of The Month

(I’m a girl looking around the movie section of a popular superstore. A male customer happens to be walking next to me through the aisle. I am wearing a Power Rangers/Pokémon crossover t-shirt. Traditionally, the red Power Ranger is the male team leader, while the pink is the ‘girly girl’ or stereotypical ‘chick’.)

Customer: “Power Rangers, huh?”

Me: “Huh? Oh, yeah.”

Customer: “Why red, though?”

Me: “Just liked the Charizard, I guess.”

Customer: “You shouldn’t have wanted Red though. You should’ve gotten Pink!”

Me: “…why? Because I’m a girl?”

Customer: “Yeah! No girl would ever be the Red Ranger!”

Me: “Actually there have been at least two female Red Rangers. The A-Squad team in ‘SPD’ had a female Red, as did the ‘Samurai’ season.”

Customer: “Those seasons didn’t exist!”

Me: “…yes, they did.”

Customer: “How would you know? You’re a girl!”

Me: “Yes, as you’ve been telling me. Would you also like to comment on the ‘Mass Effect’ games I have in the car, or—” *I hold up my right hand* “—or perhaps on my Superman ring, too, since apparently I can’t be a female geek?”

(The customer stares at me for a minute before mumbling an apology, and slinking away.)

Bad Jokes Make A Good Customer

| KY, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers

Me: “Keep in mind, sir, these items are a three day return!”

Customer: “Well I don’t think I will wait three days in line just to return some shirts.”

Me: “Haha, very clever, sir. However do not worry; I wouldn’t make you wait three days. But if they don’t fit right when you get home, bring them back to me within three days so we can get you a refund.”

Customer: “And you know what? I was eating at a fast food joint the other day. I noticed on the door in the bathroom it said that employees must wash hands. So I stood there and stood there, and no employee ever came in to wash my hands. I really didn’t think it was good service.”

Me: “Thank you, sir; that made my day.”