Misery Demands Company, Part 2

| Australia | Crazy Requests

(I’m a little hyperactive and ditzy, but mostly it comes off as being friendly, or so I think, until this customer comes up to me.)

Customer: “Miss, exactly what kind of drugs are you on?”

Me: “None at all, I assure you.”

Customer: “Bulls***! You can’t just be that happy!”

Me: *completely bewildered* “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “That’s more like it!” *picks up his things and leaves*

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Misery Demands Company

Self Disservice

| Arizona, USA | Extra Stupid, Top

(I am a customer heading for the bathroom at a store. A woman storms out of the lady’s room. It looks like she’s trying hard to keep her hands in the air and not touch anything as she marches up to an employee.)

Customer: “Do you know how long I’ve been waiting in there!? Why hasn’t anyone come in?”

Employee: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “The sign in there says ‘Employees must wash hands’! I’ve been waiting in there for fifteen minutes for someone to wash my hands!”

Weekend Roundup: Caught Red-Handed

, , , , | Not Always Right | Roundups

Caught Red-Handed! There’s nothing quite as sheisty as customer trying to pull a fast one—and nothing quite as satisfying as catching one red-handed!

  1. Caught Red-Handed:
    A sneaky customer gets called out by another customer—who just happens to be an employee!
  2. Piercing Observation:
    Underaged customers FAIL, basic biology WIN.
  3. Caught Brown Handed:
    Proof that some trails of evidence are self-evident, salty and sticky!
  4. Tripped Up:
    If customers are gonna cry child abuse, they’d better “step” up their game!
  5. A Squeaky Clean Record:
    An employee takes it easy on a young (and very squeaky) scammer.

PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news galore!

PS #2: Read more roundups here!

Show But Don’t Tell

| North Canton, OH, USA | Rude & Risque

(A female customer, approximately 18 years old, is asking a coworker of mine about our bikinis.)

Customer: “Do you guys, like, carry any bikini bottoms in white?”

Me: “I don’t think we have any. Not a lot of stores stock white bikinis.” *chuckling* “After all, you can see right through white fabric when it gets wet!”

Customer: *completely serious* “Yeah, duh. That’s why I want them!”

Waste Not, Bag Not

| Ontario, Canada | Uncategorized

(In Canada, we charge five cents for each plastic bag used, which goes to environmental fees or charities. Every store except Walmart has charged for bags for 3-4 years now.)

Customer: “You guys charge for bags?! You’re kidding me!”

Me: “Yup, we do.”

Customer: “It’s ridiculous!”

Customer’s Daughter: “But mom, we’re not going to need bags anyway.”

Customer: “I know, but it’s just so greedy! I’m not going to shop at all these stores anymore if you guys keep charging for bags!”

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