Expecting A High Level Of Service

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Bizarre, Health & Body

(I work at a large department store. I am working the closing shift in the men’s clothing department one night. Two young adults come over to look at the underwear, and they reek of marijuana. As I get closer to them, they stop me to ask me a question.)

Customer #1: “Do you work here?”

Me: *pleasantly* “Yes, I do. How can I—”

Customer #1: “Woah. You act like you don’t even wanna deal with us.”

Customer #2: “Yeah. S***…”

Me: “I’m sorry… What can I help you w—”

Customer #2: “Nah, nah, never mind.”

Customer #1: “Yeah, you already treats bad, as a… customer.”

Customer #2: “I won’t come back.”

(They leave, and I am left to ponder what I could have possibly done. Later, I told my supervisor.)

Supervisor: *laughing* “What? What was their problem?”

Me: “High as kites.”

Supervisor: “Ah. Of course. Say no more.”

Next Door Chore

| Edmonton, AB, Canada | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

Customer: “Hi, I bought these tweezers but the light doesn’t work. I want a refund.”

Me: “Sure, do you have your receipt?

Customer: *hands me a [Grocery Store] receipt*

Me: “Oh, looks like you bought this at [Grocery Store].”

Customer: “So?”

Me: “This isn’t [Grocery Store]. That’s next door.”

Customer: *angry* “Well, NOW what do I do?!”

Me: “… Go next door and get a refund?”

Customer: “Well! This is highly inconvenient!”

Doesn’t Know How To Window Shop

| England, UK | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Home Improvement

(I work in a bargains store where people can get almost anything for less than the RRP. An elderly customer approaches me.)

Customer: “Will these curtains fit my window?”

Me: “What size is the window you’re buying for?”

Customer: “Living room.”

Me: “No, sorry I mean like what are the measurements for it?”

Customer: “It’s a normal front living room window.”

Me: “Every window is different. These ones you’ve picked out are 90″x90″, so they would fit a fairly large window. Do you know the size in inches, or even centimetres? We can work from there.”

Customer: “No, but it’s the same size window as everyone else on my street, so I think it’ll be the same for everywhere. Would they fit your window?”