Bad Worker, Bad Parenting

| Reno, NV, USA | Working | June 10, 2016

(We have one coworker at our store that has been there for less time than most of her coworkers. She thinks she is better than most of the people at the store and is not well-liked. She recently got her daughter a job cashiering. When the store gets busy and the lines at the registers get long we call for backup and the sales floor people have to come up and help out. On this day we have a couple of people not show up for work and are busy.)

Me: *calling out over the radio* “Hey, guys, can we get fast service to the front, please! We need two people!”

(The bad coworker comes up, grumbling, to help out. After the lines die down she comes up to me and my other coworker.)

Bad Coworker: “This is ridiculous! Why do you keep calling us up so many times for fast service! I have stuff to do!”

Me: “We had three call outs today up here alone! It sucks but that is part of the job. We have to make sure it is ‘guest first.’”

Bad Coworker: “We need more reliable people up here. This is why no one likes the front end people!”

Coworker #2: “Isn’t this like the fourth time in two weeks YOUR DAUGHTER has not shown up for her cashier shift?

(Bad coworker got quiet and then walked away. Since her daughter was still in her probation phase of working she was let go the next day! I guess she thought since her mom worked there she could do whatever she wanted.)

Time To Start A Relationship With A New Laptop

| PA, USA | Working | June 10, 2016

(I work in a computer store.)

Me: “Okay, so, what seems to be the problem with your laptop?”

Customer: “It won’t turn on and it smells like burnt plastic for some reason. I think the motherboard is fried.”

Me: “Let me take a look at it.”

(He removes it from the box and I am horrified to find that it appears to have been smashed and set on fire.)

Me: “So… a little fried, huh?”

Customer: “Yeah… my girlfriend and I broke up a week ago. So, can you fix it or do I have to buy a new one?”

(On the plus side, I made a sale that day.)

Filters Out All Useful Advice

| Manhattan, KS, USA | Right | June 9, 2016

(Our store sells “oil change specials” where if you buy five quarts of oil and filter in one transaction it will be reduced in price, in this case for less than what the oil cost alone.)

Customer: “I need oil for a [year of vehicle] [size of engine].”

(Assuming it is for the massive truck taking up two parking slots that is the correct vintage, I inform the customer that it takes five quarts of 5w-30 oil. The customer, by now back where the oil is, has picked out the brand of choice and is starting back towards the front.)

Me: “That oil is currently on special for $18.99 with a filter. Would you like to add one to your purchase?”

Customer: “No, I’ll get that later.”

(I inform him that it would be less expensive to buy them together today rather than on separate occasions… He still is not getting it and starts to show signs of frustration and annoyance. So I hold my tongue and check him out accordingly to his request.)

Me: “That’ll be $23.01 sir.”

Customer: “What?! But the sign says $18.99. Did taxes jump?!”

(I try to inform him again and decide it is best to just ring him out for the filter he needs and re-subtotal it.)

Me: “Okay, that’ll be $20.30.”

Customer: “Now that’s more like it.”

(I finish transaction and try to hand him the filter.)

Customer: “I don’t need that yet.” *grabs jug and leaves without receipt or filter*

Balls-To-The-Walls Crazy

| Renton, WA, USA | Right | June 8, 2016

(It is during the French Open, at my tennis shop. The phone rings.)

Me: “[Shop], how may I help you?”

Customer: *sounds frustrated* “I can’t see the tennis ball!”

Me: Sorry, ma’am, can you elaborate?

Customer: “I’m watching TV on one of those big HD TVs and the TV salesman said I should be able to everything but I still can’t see the ball. It’s so small and blends into the court. I was so upset and just didn’t know who I should call!”

Me: “You are watching the French Open and you can’t see the yellow ball on the clay courts?”

Customer: “Exactly! Is there anything you can do to help? I was so concerned and I didn’t know what to do so I just opened the phone book and you were the only listing under ‘tennis.’”

Me: *trying not to laugh as my boss walks in the shop* “I’m sorry, ma’am, but this is a local pro shop thousands of miles away from the French Open. We have absolutely no jurisdiction over the size and color of the tournament balls. There’s really nothing I can do.”

Customer: *obviously missing the point* “There aren’t any other colors of balls?”

Me: “We do carry pink Breast Cancer Awareness balls.”

Customer: “No, thank you. I think that would look worse on the TV.”

The Realization Has Expired

| Canada | Right | June 8, 2016

(I work at a popular beauty supply store. A family had been browsing around for quite a while before coming to the front to pay. We offer a discount card which expires annually. The customer didn’t have her card, but I looked up the number and punched it in manually.)

Me: “I see that your card has expired. I can give you some stickers to take home to put on your card so you know when it expires next.”

Customer: “What?”

Me: “You don’t have your physical card with you, correct? So I’m giving you these expiration date stickers to put on your card at home.”

Customer: “But my card is at home.”

Me: “That’s why I’m giving you the stickers. To put on your card. That’s at your home.”

(My coworker, sensing my frustration, stepped in.)

Coworker: “Your card expired, so she’s giving you stickers to put on your card when you go home.”

(This somehow clicked with the customer.)

Customer: “Why didn’t you say that in the first place?!”

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