On The Edge Of Your Car Seat

| Houston, TX, USA | Right | July 11, 2016

(While working in the stock room, I hear a blood-curdling scream from the front of the store. I rush up to the front to find a woman clutching her chest and pointing out the window at a small boy in the parking lot.)

Woman: “I’m so sorry. I just happened to look out the window and saw him run out and almost get hit by a van! Thank goodness it stopped.”

(The woman goes back to looking at merchandise, while a girl slightly older than the boy goes up to him and leads him back to the sidewalk. After a few minutes, the woman sees the children standing by the entrance.)

Woman: “Well, I guess I should head back out there. Those are my sister’s kids. I guess they got out of their car seats!”

The Bad Value Of Loyalty

| Nottingham, England, UK | Working | July 9, 2016

(I work in a major entertainment retail chain that have a purchasable loyalty card which we all feel is poor value, but we’re supposed to “upsell” to every customer. This happens in my end of year review.)

Manager: “Your numbers on the [Store] card are too low.”

Me: “That’s because it’s a rip off. A DVD costs £10, the card adds another 30% onto their total, and people don’t want to pay that.”

Manager: “Then why does [Colleague] get the numbers?”

Me: “Because he aggressively oversells the card to people who don’t really understand what they’re signing up for.”

Manager: “Well, why don’t you do that?”

Me: “You want me to lie to vulnerable people to sell it?”

Manager: “If you don’t want to we can find someone that does.”

(The business went into administration not long after. I left for a different job but after restructuring my old manager was demoted to sales assistant.)

Refunder Blunder, Part 24

| England, UK | Right | July 9, 2016

(Customer comes in to return a lipstick that is faulty. She takes a replacement lipstick and some other items.)

Me: “So, your total £8.50.”

Customer: “Well, that’s not right.”

Me: “Yep, the total of your items comes to £8.50.”

Customer: “What about my £6 return for the lipstick?”

Me: “Oh, well, you took another in replacement, so you won’t technically get your money back.”

Customer: “Why not? I wanted a refund. Where’s my £6?”

Me: “Sorry, I’m confused. Did you not want a new lipstick in return for your damaged one?”

Customer: “Yes, but I don’t understand where my £6 has gone?”

Me: “Well, you used it to pay for your replacement lipstick.”

Customer: *getting annoyed* “But I already paid for it? So why don’t I get my £6 back? It was faulty!“

Me: “Yes, madam, if you just take a look at the receipt, you’ll see that I’ve returned your faulty lipstick at £6, and then sold you back a new one, also at £6, so there’s no refund to give, you just have to pay for your additional items, which come to £8.50.”

Customer: “That’s so confusing. I don’t know why you’ve done it like that.”

(The customer reluctantly paid the £8.50, while muttering that it should definitely be £2.50 because of her £6 refund. She left telling me that she was going to be in contact with customer services. I wished her the best of luck.)

 

Getting Shirty About The Lack Of Shirts

| Kansas City, MO, USA | Right | July 7, 2016

(A customer unfolds the last shirt we have of a certain design, size, and color, and then approaches me as I am exiting the stockroom and still have my hand on the doorknob. I know it is the last one because I just finished putting the last of our stock on that display. We are a very small store, with a stock room that consists of only four shelves, only one of which holds clothing. I usually know exactly what is in stock, and when I don’t, I can open the door and glance at the shelf in about a second.)

Customer: “Can I have another shirt? This one is wrinkled and dirty.”

Me: “We don’t have another shirt like that.”

Customer: “You’re not going to check?”

Me: “Okay.” *pushes door open to look at shelf* “That’s all we have.”

Customer: “You didn’t check.”

Me: *opens door further, so he can see, and puts hand on shelf* “If we had them, they would be right here. I can call the store in [Location #1] or [Location #2] for you.”

Customer: “No, you should have this shirt. I want you to get me this shirt.”

Me: “Okay. I will get you this shirt.” *intentional emphasis on the word “this”*

(I took the shirt back into the stock room, unfolded a similar shirt and removed the tissue paper and straight pins, then used them to refold the shirt the customer gave me in the manner in which the distributer ships them. I returned the shirt to the customer, and he accepted and bought it without complaint.)

Making A Big Deal Out Of No Deal

| NJ, USA | Right | July 7, 2016

(A woman comes to me with a doll in her hand and asks me for a price check. I take the doll and scan the barcode and, as I’m waiting for the scanner to load, she peers over my shoulder in the most invasive way possible.)

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Oh, the doll is on sale for $4.99?” *referring to the inventory price*

Me: “No, that is the price the store has purchased it for; the doll is $19.49.”

Customer: “So I can’t buy it for $4.99?”

Me: “No, the store wouldn’t get any money. That’d be bad business.” *we both chuckle and she walks away*

Customer: “What a shame. $20 is very expensive for a doll.”

(About five minutes later I get a call from the register asking for the price of the doll. I tell my coworker it is $19.49. Turns out the customer I just talked to INSISTS that I said it was on sale. I am dragged over to the front and we spend three minutes explaining that no such deal exists. Now there is a line, there are three employees trying to explain to her that she cannot get it for $5, and an additional two employees from the back working the extra registers to deal with the huge line.)

Customer: “Get me your manager.”

(After another two minutes.)

Manager: “Yes, what is this issue?”

(This circus ride goes on for another three minutes until she realizes that the manager is not going to budge and trusts me.)

Customer: “If it wasn’t on sale, he should’ve said something. I misunderstood and caused a scene. Sorry, I don’t want the doll anymore.”

(15 minutes, five employees, and a congested line, and we didn’t even get the sale. This was my worst memory because she was not woefully ignorant; she knew exactly what she was doing trying to get that deal.)

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