Interested In Ply-Red, Not Blood-Red

| England, UK | Crazy Requests, Health & Body

(I am working one day, repackaging some glass bottles of beer where one had shattered, and am knocking off the shards of glass with a safety knife. A customer approaches me.)

Customer: “Hello, I am wondering if you could help me find some three ply red napkins. You have three ply in other colors.”

Me: “I’m sure we do; I’ll just check the system to find a shelf location and see if we have any in stock.”

(As I go to put down the bottle I am holding, a shard of glass embeds itself in my hand.)

Me: “Agh! Sorry, bear with me one second.”

(I pull the shard out.)

Me: “Okay, so, three ply red right?”

Customer: “Sorry, were you helping me, or were you busy tending to your own business? Jesus, I’m here to spend my hard-earned cash, and you can’t even give me the time of day!”

Takes A Backbone To Stand Up For Yourself

| Oklahoma City, OK, USA | Bad Behavior, Health & Body, Top

(I am a 28-year-old female. I have just parked in a handicapped spot to go grocery shopping. I had surgery on my spine a month prior to this incident. I put my handicapped sticker up and exit my car when a random customer comes up to me.)

Customer: “How dare you!”

Me: “I beg your pardon?”

Customer: “You should be absolutely ASHAMED of yourself! It’s young people like you who have NO respect for anything! Who do you think you are? Parking in a handicapped spot! You aren’t even handicapped! I bet you stole that from someone, and you are just using it so you won’t have to park farther away!”

Me: “Well, actually ma’am, it’s my handicapped sticker. I—”

Customer: “Yours? You’re perfectly healthy! You shouldn’t lie to people! LIARS GO TO HELL! I can tell just by LOOKING at you that you’re perfectly fine! You’re just lazy.”

(I’m livid, but I try to keep my composure.)

Me: “Actually, it is my handicapped sticker. As I was trying to tell you before you rudely interrupted me and started throwing around assumptions, I have Lupus, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Fibromyalgia, Sjogren’s Syndrome, and Degenerative Disk Disease. Furthermore, not all physical disabilities can be readily seen. This is the first time in a month that I’ve been well enough to get out of the house on my own since having my spinal fusion surgery last month. Next time, you should think before you speak, instead of just making random asinine assumptions about people you don’t know.”

(The customer looks like a deer in the headlights. She turns bright red, and continues to mumble as she walks away. I get my shopping done, and see her as I’m checking out. Surprisingly, she apologizes profusely, and offers to help me load my groceries into my car.)

Pay Attention

| AZ, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Health & Body

(One of our registers has been closed all day, with plenty of signs to say so. A customer runs up to me with a heavy accent.)

Customer: “Pay! I need to pay!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but this register is currently closed. The nearest open registers are—”

Customer: *holds out a sweater to me* “Pay?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but this register is closed. The nearest open register is just down that way.”

Customer: “No, no, I need to PAY!”

Me: “Ma’am, this register is closed. Closed.” *I speak slowly* “I cannot work the register for you. They are locked. Only a manager can—”

(The customer starts writhing around in a strange manner, with her sweater held over her stomach and her legs bowed together.)

Customer: “Oh, I need to pay! So bad!”

(One of my coworkers has a brainwave and comes up to the customer.)

Coworker: “Excuse me, do you need a restroom? A bathroom?”

Customer: *looks at my coworker cheerfully* “I can pay?”

Coworker: “You need to… pee? A bathroom?”

Customer: “Pay!”

(The customer begins energetically following my coworker.)

Coworker: “The bathrooms are just down this way; if you follow this aisle, turn left up here and—”

Customer: “No! I need to PAY!”

(The customer runs off, completely ignoring my coworker’s directions. We still aren’t entirely sure what she was asking for!)

Weighted Opinions

| Vancouver, BC, Canada | At The Checkout, Bigotry, Technology

(I am an early 20s, able-bodied male, with a fair bit of muscle, and I also happen to be the only employee in the store who fits such a description.)

Me: “Hi, how are you today?”

Customer: “Good, thank you. Can I get a 55-inch [brand] TV, please?”

Me: “Why, certainly.”

(I make a phone call to the back stockroom to request the customer’s TV. While I am processing the sale, the person bringing the rather large & heavy item is one of my young female coworkers.)

Coworker: “Here’s your TV, ma’am! If you’re done shopping today, I will be glad to take this to your car!”

Customer: *to me* “Shame on you, young man. Shame on you!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I don’t quite follow.”

Customer: “How dare you make such a fragile young girl bring out something so big! She could’ve seriously injured herself! You should be ashamed!”

Me: “Believe me, ma’am: I would prefer to have done this job myself, but I have no control over my position. They put me on cash because I happened to be a little better at it, and my coworker here does this all the time.”

Customer: “This is not right! This is not right at all! A tall, bulky man like you should do the heavy lifting! Not this poor skin and bones over here!”

Coworker: “Ma’am, I’m seriously okay with this. When women fought for equal rights long ago, they knew that this was going to happen. And I’m glad it did.”

Customer: “But girls sh—”

Coworker: “Girl power! That’s what it is!”

Customer: “Alright fine, just load the d*** TV into the truck already.”

(My coworker helps the customer with her TV. A few weeks later, the same customer is at my till once again, this time, to buy a couch.)

Customer: “Alright, I know that a couple of weeks ago, that nice, young girl proved more than capable of doing this. But I still feel really bad for her, so can you get somebody else to help me?”

Me: “Not a problem, ma’am, she isn’t even in today.”

(This time, I call my manager to bring out the couch.)

Manager: “Okay, ma’am, where are you parked?”

(The customer takes a good look at my manager. Although my manager is a man, he very much looks like he is approaching his 70s.)

Customer: “This whole store is backwards!” *stomps out*

Manager: “What the h*** was her problem?”

Me: “Equal opportunity employment, apparently.”

Checkouts Are Places For Change

| Sandy, UT, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Money, Top

(I am standing in line around midnight. In front of me is a pregnant girl, around 20 years old. She is wearing pajamas, and clearly looking as if she has seen better days. She also has a black eye, which is a little alarming to me.)

Cashier: “Did you find everything alright?”

Pregnant Customer: “Yes, thanks. Can you see if my card has anything on it before you ring it up?”

Cashier: “No, sorry. I could ring things up one at a time and see if it’ll take for each one. If you don’t mind waiting for me to cash out the other three people in line, I’ll be more than happy to do that for you.”

Pregnant Customer: “No, no, let’s just try. I hope the deposit has hit already.”

(The cashier rings everything in, and the pregnant customer swipes the card. It declines.)

Cashier: “Do you have another form of payment?”

Pregnant Customer: “No…” *starts crying* “He must have already cancelled the card.”

Cashier: “Cancelled the card?”

Pregnant Customer: “My ex-boyfriend kicked me out tonight. He came home and said the baby couldn’t be his, hit me, and threw me out. He must have called and cancelled our food stamp card. I don’t even know where I’m going to put all this. A friend is letting me use her extra fridge until I can get an apartment.”

(One of the customers in line behind me speaks up.)

Customer Behind Me: “Ma’am, just put it on my ticket.”

(I move out of the way so the customer behind me can push his cart forward. He clearly has $200 or more worth of food on his own, and the pregnant customer has about $150.)

Cashier: “Sure.”

Pregnant Customer: “No, no I can’t.”

Customer Behind Me: “Honey, don’t lecture me. My mom was kicked out by my dad because he thought she was sleeping around on him. She worked two jobs to keep a roof over my head. I’m not letting some deadbeat a**-hole throw his girlfriend out because he has trust issues.”

Pregnant Customer: “I can’t. It’s too much. I don’t have a job; I can’t pay you back.”

Customer Behind Me: “Take my card. I’ve seen you in here a few times during regular shopping hours. You’re always very nice to the employees and everyone in line. I need a receptionist for my apartment complex on [street]. Come by tomorrow, and we’ll have an interview. I give discounts to my employees on their rent.”

(By this time, the cashier has finished ringing in the items, and they’re bagged already.)

Cashier: “Your total is $459.92.”

(The customer behind me gently pushes past the pregnant customer. He swipes his card, enters his pin, and then hugs her.)

Customer Behind Me: “Things do get better. See me tomorrow; I’m serious.”

(Sir, wherever you are… You restored some of my faith in humanity. Thank you. Ma’am, wherever you are, I hope you and your baby have a great life, and you find someone to take care of you both and love you the way you deserve. I hope you got that job, but judging from how the man was talking, I’m sure you did!)