No Real Cause For Concern

| USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests

(I work at a very busy furniture store that is often out of stock of popular items and is constantly changing stock. A customer demands an item that has been discontinued and is no longer displayed as current merchandise. A manager and I find out there is an order of one left coming in but the date is unknown and a week later explains to the customer that the date is set to arrive a month from now.)

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, but the merchandise you ordered isn’t expected to come in until the 31st, so—”

Customer: “What do you mean the 31st!? This is not acceptable.”

Me: “Ma’am, we have no control over the expected date. We no longer carry it on our floor and a final order has been fulfilled for you at the expected date but we will—”

Customer: “No, that is not acceptable. No one told me it was no longer available. You need to make this right for me.”

Me: “Well, ma’am, before you started talking I was trying to tell you we would refund your money for delivery since you are having to wait such a long period of time.”

Customer: “Well, you should apologize for that.”

Me: “Ma’am, I did apologize right before the first time you interrupted me.”

Customer: “You should do something to make me happy.”

Me: “Ma’am, after I apologized I offered you our delivery service for free which would normally cost you $120.”

Customer: “Fine. You should sound more concerned. Your voice didn’t sound sincere enough for me.”

Now You’re Talking

| Allentown, PA, USA | Bizarre

(I am alone in my store when a customer comes in. Because of where I am located, I can’t get to within her line of sight immediately, but it’s not a very big store so she can hear me.)

Me: “Hi! How are you today?”

Customer: “I’m well, thanks, and you?”

Me: “Fine, thank you!”

(I continue talking as I walk. I am now two feet away from her and wearing a nametag.)

Me: “Has it been a while since were here?”

Customer: “Oh. Um. I guess it has?”

Me: “Okay, welcome back!”

(She gives me a puzzled look.)

Customer: “Do you, um, work here or something?

Me: *baffled* “Yes, ma’am?”

Customer: “Oh, I thought you were another customer. I wondered why you were so chatty!”

Pajama Drama, Part 2

| San Francisco, CA, USA | Health & Body, Rude & Risque

(I work in the lingerie section of a very well-known department store when a male customer walks in.)

Me: “Hi there. What were you looking for today?”

Customer: “I’m looking for some sexy bras and underwear for my girlfriend.”

Me: “Okay, did you know her bra size?”

Customer: “Um… no.”

Me: “Well… sexy pajamas it is, then!”

Related:
Pajama Drama

Tried Explaining Until The Cows Came Home

| Santa Monica, CA, USA | Extra Stupid, Pets & Animals

Customer: “What type of leather is this bag made from?”

Coworker: “It’s made of cow.”

Customer: “What’s a cow?”

(My coworker tries to hide his general shock at this question.)

Coworker: “You know the black and white spotted animal? It lives on a farm?”

Customer: *shakes her head* “I don’t know.”

Coworker: “Where do we get our milk from?”

Customer: *shakes her head again* “I don’t know.”

(My coworker stopped short of actually mooing like a cow.)

Blood Type Z-Negative

| Orange County, CA, USA | Bizarre, Extra Stupid

(We carry liquid candy blood packs at our novelty shop. One looks like a regular blood IV bag and the other is green and is called ‘zombie blood.’ A customer comes up to the counter with a worried look and points to the zombie blood.)

Customer: “Is this REAL?”

Page 178/574First...176177178179180...Last