Some People Need To Be Put Away

, | MD, USA | Crazy Requests, Theme Of The Month

(I am finishing up my shopping experience by doing the impossible – putting the things I don’t want back where I got them. A random woman on her phone thrusts a pile of clothes into my arms.)

Me: “What the h***?”

(I drop the clothes on the floor.)

Woman: “What are you doing?! Put those away!”

Me: “Why the h*** would I put your clothes away for you?! Put them away yourself!”

Woman: “What the f*** is your problem?! DO YOUR JOB!”

Me: “I DON’T work here! Why would you assume that I did?! Pick up your clothes and put them away yourself!”

Woman: “Then why are you putting clothes away if you don’t work here?!” *smug that she caught me in a supposed lie*

Me: “Because that’s what you do when you don’t want to buy something – YOU PUT IT BACK.”

Woman: “Oh… Can you still put these away for me though?”

Me: “NO! Do it yourself!”

(She opened and closed her mouth a few times before just walking away. Some people seriously shouldn’t be allowed in stores.)

I Didn’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here

| Langley, BC, Canada | Bad Behavior, Theme Of The Month

(I’m just shopping, when another customer comes by to ask me a question.)

Customer: “Hey, how much is this?”

Me: “I don’t know.”

Customer: “You don’t know?! You work here, don’t you?!”

Me: “No, I don’t work here.”

Customer: *muttering* “God-d*** it, no one f****** works here. Can’t find any god-d*** help anywhere.”

(The customer walks away, and I figure that is the end of that. Fast-forward a few months later: I need a job, and I just so happen to end up working for this very same store. On my first week I am feeling rather chipper and enthusiastic about helping customers.)

Me: “Hello, sir, is there anything I can help you with today?”

Customer: “I thought you didn’t work here! Were you being a lazy s*** back then?!”

(Yep. Same customer.)

Related:
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 16
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 15
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 14

Loading Up Goodwill

| Netanya, Israel | Home Improvement, Theme Of The Month

(I am a customer at a popular Swedish cheap furniture mega-chain. On this evening I have just finished exchanging a disassembled table I mistakenly bought for the model I wanted. While I am loading the new box into my car, an older lady asks me to help with her new furniture.)

Customer #1: “Excuse me, can you help me load this into my car?”

Me: “But of course!”

(As I load the woman’s furniture into her vehicle, a middle-aged man nearby sees me doing that and assumes that it is my job.)

Customer #2: “When you’re done there, can you come help me?”

Me: “Um, I don’t actually work here, but sure.”

Customer #2: “Oh, you don’t? I’m sorry.”

Me: “It’s no problem, I’ll help anyway.”

(I help the man load his car, and he hands me a coin.)

Customer #2: “Well here, take this for your trouble.”

(I got a tip of 5 shekels – about $1.3 – without even working there.)