Sunday Funday

| London, England, UK | Extra Stupid, Family & Kids

Customer: “It’s a Sunday! You all shouldn’t be working; I feel so sorry for you.”

Me: “I’d rather be home, but the shops stay open so we have to work.”

Customer:  “Why don’t they just stay closed?”

Me: “Well if people didn’t shop on Sundays, there would be no need for us to open.”

Customer: “They should cancel all Sunday shopping so that you can be home with your family.”

Me: “I’d sure love that! Maybe you should be home with yours, too?”

Customer: “But my family is here! We’re all shopping together!”

To Hang Up Would Be Poetic Justice

| Indianapolis, IN, USA | Bad Behavior, Technology, Theme Of The Month

(I’m working the closing shift in the electronics department, which is in charge of video games and the photo lab in addition to the actual electronics section. We’re currently running an upgrade on our photo lab’s software, and I’m expecting a call from corporate to check up on the progress of the upgrade. An outside call comes in on my phone. It’s not corporate but a male customer who sounds perfectly normal. I am also male.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, what’s the price on your Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare?”

Me: “I can check on that for you. I think it’s $59.99, but I’ll be able to confirm that for you in just a second…”

(As I’m walking over to the video game section, the customer begins reading me some of the most bizarre, suggestive, awful love poetry you’ve ever heard and starts making advances. I assume he wrote the poetry himself. This freaks me out, and I end the call immediately and call my team leader to let her know what had just happened.)

Me: “Hey, if you hear that I just disconnected a call, I did. Some guy called and started reading me poetry.”

(My team leader hears this and starts cracking up.)

Team Leader: “What? You should’ve transferred that call to me! I would’ve had fun with the guy!”

(‘Poetry Guy’ became an inside joke around the store. Every time I got a call from another one of my coworkers that night, they ‘read’ me poetry!)

How To Get Ahead Of The Sales

| USA | Bad Behavior, Holidays

(It is the middle of the Black Friday rush. One of my coworkers approaches me looking particularly disheveled.)

Me: “Are you okay?”

Coworker: “You know it’s Black Friday when you have to pick up discarded items from all over the floor… and while doing so, a customer tries to step on your head to avoid taking a few steps around you…”