(I’m a customer looking at a fragile jewelry display. There is a huge sign in bright colours, bigger than the display itself, saying ‘Please do not touch! We’ll be happy to come and assist you!’. I call the sales assistant over. There is another customer right next to me, looking at the same display.)

Me: “Hi, I’d like to have a look at that necklace please?”

Sales Assistant: “Oh, my God! You read the sign; I think you’re actually the first person to read it all week!”

Me: “Well, it is kind of obvious!”

Sales Assistant: “You’d think so, right?”

(We walk back to the counter. From behind us, we hear a crash. We both turn around to see the other customer with a necklace in her hand, and the entire display on the floor. She looks at us like a frightened animal, and turns bright red. She puts the necklace down, and sheepishly runs out the door. I look at the sales assistant; she looks at me, and face-palms.)

(A mother comes in with her two children: a little girl and an older boy.)

Mom: “Do you sell lip balm?”

Me: “Of course! It’s $3. Was there anything else you’d like me to get?”

Little Girl: “You’re buying lip balm? I WANT LIP BALM! I WANT IT!”

(The little girl starts screaming and demanding her mother buy her a lip balm.)

Mom: “You can share with mommy and your brother!”

Older Boy: “I don’t want to share with her! She eats lip balm!”

Little Girl: “I WANT MY OWN LIP BALM!”

(The little girl starts screeching, and punches her mother in the stomach.)

Mom: “Don’t you want to share? Sharing is fun!”

Little Girl: “I HATE YOU! I WANT MY OWN!”

(The mother turns to me, exasperated.)

Mom: “Can you just pretend to ring me up for two?”

Me: “Suuuuuuuure.”

Older Boy: “Her face is covered in barf; I don’t want to share!”

(Upon closer inspection, the little girl’s mouth does appear to be caked with some sticky substance. The mother pays, and gives her daughter the lip balm. She immediately starts eating it.)

Older Boy: “I told you!”

Mom: “Oh, my God! Give the lip balm back to mommy right now!”

Little Girl: “IT’S MINE! IT’S MINE! I HATE YOU!”

Mom: “Stop it! Here, take this. Mommy will buy this for you; do you want it?”

(The mom hands the little girl one of our incenses from the counter.)

Little Girl: “I HATE IT!”

(She throws the incense on the floor and steps on it. The mom just grabs the little girl, and they all run out.)

(I am at a high-end department store looking at shoes. I am being helped by an employee when, in the middle of our conversation, he walks off to talk to a coworker.)

Employee: *to a coworker* “I hate wasting my time on customers who aren’t going to buy. Look at her! There’s no way she can afford these shoes!”

(Note: I’m in sweatpants, but I’m carrying an expensive purse, keys to an expensive car, and wearing an expensive watch.)

Me: “Excuse me; can you come here for a moment?”

Employee: “Seriously? Fine.”

Me: “I just wanted to let you know that, if you’re going to talk about your customers, you should at least do it quietly. I know that, because I’m young, you assume that I can’t afford this stuff but if you had taken a second to pay attention to me, you probably would’ve seen that I can obviously afford these shoes. That being said, you should treat all of your customers equally well whether you think they can afford your merchandise or not. I don’t care if a homeless person walks in and enquires about your most expensive item, you should treat that person just as well as anyone else. Now I’m taking my business somewhere where they’ll treat me nicely.”

(I walk away, leaving the employee looking dumbfounded.)

(I have just finished setting up a display of fabric softener liquid and sheets. A customer approaches me and gestures to the price sign.)

Customer: “Excuse me, but is everything on this display two for $5?”

Me: “No, ma’am. That sign is for the liquid. The fabric softener sheets are only $1.99.”

Customer: “But the sign says they are two for $5!”

Me: “That’s for these items. But the sheets are only—”

Customer: “That’s what the sign says, and that is the price I want them for.”

Me: “Let me get this straight. You want me to charge you more for these items?”

Customer: “No, I want you to give them to me for the price you have advertised them for.”

(She pauses abruptly, looking down at the phone where she had been fiddling with her calculator app. She realizes her error.)

Customer: “Oh, I am so embarrassed!”

Me: “It’s okay! Enjoy your two for $3.98 fabric softener sheets!”

Manager: “Guess what?”

Co-worker: “What?”

Manager: “The new store in [city] just made $9,000 last week. That’s almost a million!”