The Pope Might Have Something To Say About That

, , , , , | Right | April 2, 2008

Customer: “Sir, it is a sin to sell these Halloween decorations.”

Me: “How else could folks get them?”

Customer: “That’s not the point. Halloween is for devil worshippers.”

Me: “No, it’s a Christian holiday, ushering in All Saints’ Day.”

Customer: “No, that’s Catholic. I’m a Christian.”


This story is part of our Devilish Halloween roundup!

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A Customer And A Blowtorch: This Cannot End Well

, , , | Right | April 1, 2008

(At our store, we sell mostly tool related items. At the time, I worked in the welding section and was letting a customer try out a few welding tools. He was trying a MIG welder, which requires you to be quite close to the work.)

Customer: “Why isn’t this working?” (Holds torch about three feet from work.)

Me: “Well, you have to hold it about an inch away from the work for it to work.”

Customer: “Why isn’t it working?” (He has it about a foot away now.)

Me: “Closer…”

Customer: (Six inches.)

Me: “Closer…”

Customer: (Three inches.)

Me: “Closer…”

Customer: “Why isn’t it working!” (He has just welded the torch to the work.)

Me: “Not that close!”

(This goes on for a good 20 minutes, even after I ran a beautiful bead for him at the right distance.)

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When In Doubt, Kick ‘Em Out

, , , , | Right | April 1, 2008

(A customer comes in to a video game store, obviously angry.)

Customer: “Hello, I’m here to return these two games.”

(Hands me the two games and the receipt.)

Customer: “For this game, I want my money back; for this DS game, I want a different game. It’s the same price so I don’t have to pay the difference.”

Me: “Okay, ma’am.”

(I scan the receipt and fill out the return information.)

Me: “Ma’am, your total will be $19.56.”

Customer: “What?! Why is it going to be so much if it’s the same price as the other DS game?”

Me: “Well, ma’am, you got this game for free.”

Customer: “If I would’ve paid for it, it would have been the same price so I don’t owe nothing!”

Me: “You didn’t pay anything for this game, so you won’t get anything back.”

Customer: “But if I would’ve paid for it, it would’ve been the same price. Let me speak to your manager.”

(I call my manager.)

Manager: “Well ma’am, as my employee was saying, you didn’t pay anything for this game. Therefore, you will not get your money back for something you didn’t pay for.”

Customer: “But if I would’ve paid for it–”

Manager: “You paid nothing for this game.”

Customer: “But if I would’ve paid–”

Manager: “Get out of my store.”

Customer: *walks out in a huff*


This story is included in our Videogame Store roundup.

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Like Comic Book Guy, Except Much Prettier

, , | Right | March 30, 2008

(Background: I’m the only female employee at the comic/card shop, and I was hired for my comic knowledge.)

Customer: *to my male coworker* “Did Booster Gold have a series before the new series?”

(Male coworker looks to me because he’s the card guy.)

Me: “Yeah. Early nineties. We’ve got a couple of back issues in the dollar box.”

Customer: *to my male coworker* “So you guys have it?”

Coworker: “If she says we have it, we have it.”

Customer: *finally looking at me* “Oh, you know about comics?”

Me: “That’s why they hired me.”

Customer: “But you’re a girl!”


This story is part of our International Women’s Day roundup!

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Yet Still They Come

, , | Right | March 28, 2008

(Due to a power outage we had to close our store. The lights were all out and there were 2 large green bristol board signs displaying “CLOSED, NO POWER, SORRY”. A woman walks up, walks through the entryway, and tries the door to the store proper, which is locked. She then turns around goes to the exit door, pulls it open, and walks in. I stop her.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, there is a power outage. We’re closed.”

Woman: “Does that mean I can come in?”

Me: “No. ‘Closed’ means you can’t come in.”

Woman: “Then how come THEY’RE allowed in?” *points to people behind cash registers all wearing store aprons*

Me: “Uh… they work here.”

Woman: *leaves angrily*

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