Humor Is Generational

, , , , , | Right | July 21, 2010

(A customer of about 85 years old approaches customer service. It is Father’s Day.)

Customer: “Where do you keep your belts?”

Me: “Over in the men’s department.”

Customer: “And where do you keep your grooming sets?”

Me: “In the men’s department as well.”

Customer: “Oh, thanks! I’m buying a Father’s Day present for my dad and grandfather!”

(I tell him he’s welcome and turn back to what I was doing. I notice a few seconds later that he’s still there.)

Me: “Is there something else I can help you with?”

Customer: *grinning widely* “Do you believe me?!”

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In(Console)able

| Right | July 20, 2010

(A young little girl walks up to the one of the cashiers.)

Girl: “Do you have any [gaming console] ?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sweetie. We’re all out right now.”

Girl: “Can you go in the back and make one?”

Me: “We can’t make [consoles]. We get shipped the [consoles] to sell.”

(With a sullen look, the little girl walks away and comes back soon after with her mother.)

Mother: “You don’t have any [consoles] currently?”

Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, we do not.”

Mother: “Well, can you go in the back and make one?”

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Who Is The Dumbest Of Them All

| Right | July 19, 2010

Customer: “Are these mirrors weird?”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Customer: “These mirrors, are they weird?”

Me: “Not to my knowledge.”

Customer: *looks in mirror* “But that’s not me!”

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Playing The Name Game

| Right | July 17, 2010

(A customer calls in with a question. This is during heavy snow, so traveling to a store is a big deal.)

Customer: “Hi I’m looking for [name of video game], but not [game with very similar name]. I’ve called in everywhere and no one seems to have it.”

Me: “Okay, Let me just look that up for you.”

(I proceed with looking up the game and find out that they stopped making the series and that there wasn’t in fact even a game by the title she wanted.)

Me: “Okay it looks like we have [game with similar name] but they never made [game she wanted].”

Customer: “Oh great! I’ll come right down to pick it up! I can’t believe you have it!”

(The customer hangs up before I can repeat that we didn’t have it and that it doesn’t exist. Later in the day my boss informs me a lady up front wants to talk to me; I dread going to the front to a woman who has driven through to snow to look for a game doesn’t exist.)

Customer: “Hi, [my name]! I just wanted to thank you in person for helping me find [game she wanted]. My son was looking for it everywhere!”

(As she says this, she holds up the game with the similar title.)

Me: “You’re… welcome?”

Son: “Mom! You’ve been calling it the wrong name all day!”

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Salvation Barmy

| Right | July 13, 2010

(We take electronics and recycle them for people.)

Me: “Thank you for calling! How may I help you?”

Caller: “Yes, do you recycle clothes?”

Me: “Clothes? No, we only take electronics. You should try the homeless charity across the street.”

Caller: “I don’t want to give them to homeless people. I just want to recycle them!”

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