(I am a teenager fresh out of school. I need some money but don’t have much work experience, so I apply for several retail and entry-level jobs. I get a few interviews, including one at a well-known retail chain, [Store]. The interview goes well, and I am told I’ll hear from them within the week. In the meantime, I continue going on interviews, and about two weeks later I accept a job in another field. Two full months after my interview at [Store], I get the following phone call:)

HR Representative: “Hi, this is [HR Representative] from [Store], calling for [My Name]. We just wanted to let you know that your first shift is on Monday, so we need you to come in and fill out some paperwork before then.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. It’s been so long since the interview, and I hadn’t heard anything, so I accepted another position. I appreciate your call, but I’m afraid I won’t be able to work with you.”

HR Representative: “But you filled out an application and said you wanted a job.”

Me: “Yes, I did. But my interview was two months ago, and no one from [Store] ever contacted me to offer me a job, or to tell me that I was in line for one. Your call is the first contact I’ve had. I applied several places and have accepted a position in another field. I really needed a job, you see, so I took one when it was offered.”

HR Representative: “Well, we’re really short-staffed, so we need you to start on Monday.”

Me: “Again, I’m sorry, but I really can’t. The job I’ve accepted is full-time, Monday to Friday, so I really wouldn’t be available for anything beyond occasional part-time work.”

HR Representative: “But we need you on Monday.”

Me: *pause* “…and I’m very sorry, but I am not available.”

HR Representative: “You shouldn’t lie on your application. If you say you want a job, you should take it when it’s offered.”

Me: “That’s exactly what I did.”

(This has happened multiple times as I finish ringing up a customer.)

Me: “Is there anything else I can help you with today?”

Customer: “No, that’s it.”

Me: “Okay, your total is [total].”

(The customer then points at a child holding a toy, on the other side of the store, who in no way has displayed any connection to the customer until just this moment.)

Customer: “Did you get his toy?”

Me: “No. Please bring it up here and I’ll ring it up.”

(I work in a large retail chain and part of my job is theft prevention. A customer approaches me with a trolley containing one of our most expensive MixMasters and a pillow.)

Customer: “I have just realized that I left my wallet in the car; would you mind leaving this pillow behind registers for me while I go and get it?”

(I notice that the MixMaster has one of our store’s security stickers on it with the store name clearly printed on it.)

Me: “Not a problem. I will just need to see a receipt for that MixMaster before you leave the store.”

(The customer hands me a receipt — from a different chain of stores — that has no product name on it whatsoever, only a price at the bottom which doesn’t not match the price of the product.)

Me: “Sorry, but this receipt isn’t for this product. It is also from a different store, whereas the product you have in your trolley is from our store.”

(At this point, I am well aware that the customer is attempting to steal the MixMaster. The customer knows this and begins to get very defensive.)

Customer: “No! I brought this from [Other Store], and you can’t prove I didn’t. I have given you the receipt for it, so it is mine!”

Me: “As I said before, the receipt doesn’t match the product, and this product is from [Our Store], as you can see from this sticker here. If you can’t prove that you have paid for it here, I have to take it from you.”

(This goes on for a while longer, and the customer becomes more and more difficult to deal with. It is at this point that I realize the box the customer has in her trolley is, in fact, a display box, meaning it contains nothing at all.)

Me: “Fine. Have it your way. You can keep the MixMaster if you want; however, it won’t do you much good, since what you have in your trolley is actually a display box.”

(I picked the box up to confirm it was, in fact, empty, and the customer seized it from my hands. I watched her face drop as she realized that the box contained nothing at all. She then proceeded to slam the box onto the ground and run out the front door without another word.)

(I work at a popular retail chain in the copy and print department. It is Labor Day, so because of shortened hours, I am working from open to close, alone. A very unhappy man wants some flyers printed off of his flash drive.)

Customer: “I want this flyer here printed at a full half-page. I want like 100 or 200 printed.”

Me: *pulls up document, checks the actual size of the image in inches* “Sir, it looks like this image is 5×5 inches, which is a perfect square; without stretching it out of proportion, it won’t fill it. There will be a white border around some of it in order to keep the proportions of the image in check and not obscure it. I can show you the biggest I can print it without stretching it.”

Customer: *silent*

Me: *prints off the sample document and shows it to him*

Customer: “This won’t work; I need it to fill the whole half of the page.”

Me: “The only way that I can do that right now is to put it into Photoshop and stretch it out of proportion in order to fill it.”

Customer: “No! You shouldn’t have to do that! I had this file made specifically for this; there’s nothing wrong with it!”

(My manager has come over because she needs to count the tills and lock the doors.)

Me: “Okay… Well, because the image is square, it won’t fill it without me stretching it, which might make the small words on the bottom here hard to read.”

(I print him a few more sizes as examples. We get probably eight different sizes printed for him.)

Customer: *looks at all the different sizes of images on the paper in front of him* “I don’t feel like you guys are giving me the time of day. There’s a way to do this, but you guys are just making it harder than it really is.”

Me: “Like I said before, in order to meet the criteria of the image you are requesting, I would have to stretch it to fill the half page, because the file is square and the paper is rectangular.”

Customer: “I deserve more attention than this.”

Manager: “I’m sorry, but like she said, it’s not really coming out.”

(I look at the clock and it’s now 6:27, three minutes before I’m supposed to clock out and go home. I haven’t even touched my closing duties because I’ve been helping this guy.)

Me: “It’s 6:27. I need to start cleaning up soon; we’re supposed to be leaving in three minutes.”

(The customer ignores my comment. We print him off some more sizes.)

Customer: “I don’t get why you guys just can’t do this.”

Me: “If you want, I can take down your name and phone number, and I can leave a copy of the image in our customer files. When I come back in the morning, I can make it the correct size, since there isn’t much time tonight to fix the file and print off a hundred flyers.”

Customer: “No, I feel very disrespected. I want my flash drive back.”

Manager: “I’m sorry that you feel that way. We didn’t want to make you feel that way.”

Customer: “Then, why can’t you guys just print it correctly?”

Manager: “It’s just that we closed at six, and it’s a holiday.”

Customer: “Oh, so, you closed at six and it’s a holiday; that’s your excuse. I’m going to make sure you both get written up about this.”

Me: “Yes, we closed over a half hour ago. Did you still want us to try and work on it tomorrow morning?”

Customer: “No! I know there’s nothing wrong with this file. I paid to have it made.”

(The customer storms off towards the doors. My manager follows to she can open the doors and move the gate. As he is leaving, he is making it obvious he is looking for contact information somewhere by the door, and then, thankfully, he wanders off into the night. My manager comes back to the print department.)

Manager: “Well, he was kind of rude, wasn’t he?”

Me: “Yeah, but what can we do?”

(We were both late in starting our closing duties, so we didn’t finish until a half-hour after we were supposed to have already left. My manager said he probably would have been happier had someone with “more technical experience” been working. I don’t know if she meant me or her, but I’ve printed off hundreds of different flyers, so I know how to do it. I might not know every trick in the book. Maybe there was an easier way, but either way, we tried. The next morning I saw my manager again. She told me that she kept waking up last night because of that guy. She was so worried that he was really going to report her that she kept checking our customer survey review website to see if he had anything to say.)

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(It’s not uncommon around where I live for people or businesses to leave off sales tax when customers pay in cash. Because this is illegal, my business does not leave tax off, but many customers are still used to this practice. I’ve had many variations of this conversation:)

Me: “Hello! Your total today will be $425.”

Customer: “Okay, but I have cash so there’s no tax.”

Me: “Sorry, sir. Your material is taxable, so I’ll have to charge sales tax.”

Customer: “What?! What are you talking about? I’m. Paying. In. CASH. NO TAX!”

Me: “Sir, it is against the law to not charge tax on taxable items.”

Customer: “Well, I don’t see how that’s my problem!”

Me: “Sir, I am not willing to get in trouble with the government over your $25 in tax money. If you do not intend to pay the full amount, I’m afraid you will not be leaving here with your material.”

Customer: *pays, but leaves muttering about us and the government*