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Ignorant Of Your Ignoring

| Louisville, KY, USA | Bad Behavior

(Part of my job involves greeting customers and touching back with them to make sure they’re able to find what they were looking for. I also have to ask them about opening store charge card which is as awkward for me as it is for them. Most of the customers are polite and good-natured about it.)

Me: “Oh, good afternoon, ma’am! What brings you in today?”

(The customer is already walking in the other direction. This happens sometimes since sometimes my voice can be kind of soft, especially when we have several customers coming in over a short period of time, so I just assume she didn’t hear me and think nothing of it. Later, I find her browsing in my zone while I’m touching back with customers.)

Me: “Hi, ma’am, are you finding everything all right?”

Customer: “Hm.”

Me: “Will you be shopping with our store charge—”

Customer: “I don’t like this kind of service. I thought I made that clear when I ignored you at the door!”

(I’m so stunned that I can’t say anything as she walks out the door. I turn to see one of my coworkers and another customer staring after her in surprise.)

Coworker: “Woah.”

Customer: “But… you were just doing your job, weren’t you?”

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You’ve Got Zero Ground To Mock Ground Zero

| NJ, USA | Bad Behavior

(I worked at my parent’s local general store when I was young, around 15. Note: Our parents are some of those who responded to 9/11 and all of us lost family members, like my aunt. It’s a very personal topic. The following takes place at our little 9/11 memorial shelf, which I’m restocking.)

Customer: “Why are they making such a big deal out of 9/11? It’s not like it happened here!”

Me: “Ma’am, our parents are ones who responded to 9/11… We only live an hour or two away from New York!”

Customer: “Oh, sweetie, 9/11 was nothing! The government makes a big deal out of everything!”

(Having not had to deal with bad customers since, I’m not used to this b**** and begin to tear up.)

Me: “Ma’am, my auntie was killed being on the thirtieth floor when the first plane flew in. My father, just two aisles away, was a responder only thirty minutes after it happened and saved three people, with my mother and me, at one year old, worrying at home! My best friend lost his big sister! Please, if you’re going to disrespect our country, leave!”

(She turned white-faced and went to leave, but was stopped by my muscular dad who threatened to call the cops. We haven’t seen her or her out-of-state car again!)

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In Line And Out Of Line, Part 16

| Temecula, CA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(A customer goes into the wrong line to do a return. She is a woman older than I and has with her a young girl, probably her daughter. While taking care of a layaway, I ask the lady if she is in line for a layaway, which is what the line is for. The following exchange ensues:)

Customer: “No, it is for a return.”

Me: “This line is for layaways only; the other line is for purchases and returns.”

(She immediately starts screaming at me.)

Customer: “I HAVE TO GO ALL THE WAY TO THE BACK OF THAT LINE?!?”

(The line has 2-3 customers, all with small purchases.)

Me: “That is the purchase and return line.”

Customer: “One of your employees told me that returns go to this line!”

Me: “Well, I can take you after this person.”

Customer: *whispering venomously to me* “I’ll make a scene, and you don’t want me to make a scene.”

(So I beat her to the punch.)

Me: *yelling* “Ma’am, I ALREADY told you I would go ahead and take you after this customer. This is the layaway line, and that is the purchase and returns line. I am doing you a favor.”

Customer: *in shock, quietly* “Thank you.”

(I finished up the layaway with the very nice lady I had been joking with before and took self-righteous return lady. She started up again, this time in a much more polite manner, telling me how she was told that that was the return line. I said nothing to her the entire transaction, so she stopped talking. I handed her the receipt without words, put back on my customer service face, and politely called the next person that had been in line longer than she had. I told my supervisor about it later, and she said, “Good for you. Do not let them run you over.” I just feel sorry for the kid.)

Related:
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 15
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 14
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 13

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Doodles Of An Adult Nature

| ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Movies & TV

(I’m a cashier at a grocery store, and I like to draw in my free time. It’s a slow day, so I pull out my doodle book and finish up with colouring a picture I’ve been working on. It’s a picture of a female character from a video game I enjoy. Note: said character usually wears just a tank top and a skirt. I don’t notice the customer at my counter.)

Customer: *clears throat*

Me: “OH! I’m sorry, ma’am. I didn’t see you there.” *I start to put away my drawing*

Customer: “Oh, no! Would you mind if I looked at that picture?”

Me: “Oh, uh, sure.” *I show it to her*

Customer: “What an interesting drawing. Does she have a name?”

Me: *scanning her items* “Yup, she’s called Pauleen.”

Customer: “What a nice name. Did you make her yourself?”

Me: “Well, I made the drawing, not the character. She’s from a video game called [Game Series].”

Customer: “Cool! But, uh, does she always wear so little clothes?”

Me: “Yes. Here, I’ll show you.” *I pull out my phone and show the customer the official art I used for the basis of my drawing*

Customer: “Oh. Okay, good. I thought you were drawing porn or something!”

Me: “Haha! No. I don’t do that. I have another picture of her, though.”

Customer: “Oh, can I see it?”

(Note: The page that my other drawing is on accidentally got torn out of my doodle book, so I keep it at my house.)

Me: “No, sorry.”

Customer: “Aw, why not?”

Me: “Well, it—”

Customer: *suddenly backs away in horror* “WAIT! I know what the problem is! You DID draw her naked, didn’t you!”

Me: “What?! N—”

Customer: “Don’t lie to me, young man! You drew a porno version of this picture and posted it online!”

Me: “No, it—”

Customer: “You probably think it’s ‘hot,’ too! You sick b******!”

Me: “For the love of God, lady! I can’t show you the other picture because it’s at my house!”

Customer: *turns red and runs out with her groceries*

(Later.)

Coworker: “So, apparently you draw [Game Series] porn?”

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Friendship Is Tragic

| OH, USA | Bad Behavior, Wild & Unruly

(A frequent customer who bears a striking resemblance to Liza Minnelli will constantly call our jewelry department and ask vague questions. She has a distinctive voice and particular cadence when she speaks so you always know it’s her on the phone. Around Christmas, we receive this call:)

Me: “Jewelry Department, this is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Not-Liza: “Do you… do you have jewelry boxes?”

Me: “Yes, we have an assortment of jewelry boxes. Are you looking for anything specific?”

Not-Liza: “I want… a jewelry box.”

Me: *knowing that she has a young daughter* “Are you looking for a little girl’s jewelry box?”

Not-Liza: “Are they pink?”

Me: “We have a few different types.”

Not-Liza: “Do you have… one with princesses on it?”

Me: “No, but we have a My Little Pony—”

Not-Liza: “I don’t want the My Little Pony!”

Me: “Well, we have the My Little Pony—”

Not-Liza: “I don’t WANT the My Little Pony!”

Me: “I’m trying to tell you what all we have.”

Not-Liza: “What DO… you have?”

Me: “We have ones with ballerinas, some that are sparkly, and… the My Little Pony—”

Not-Liza: “I DON’T WANT THE MY LITTLE PONY!”

(Two hours later my coworker and I spot her in the store, with a beautiful My Little Pony jewelry box nestled in her cart.)

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