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In Line And Out Of Line, Part 11

| Surrey, BC, Canada | Popular, Spouses & Partners

(A married couple are checking out at my till. I’ve scanned everything that they’ve placed on the counter, and I have the total ready for them. All that’s left is for them to pay, and for me to give them their receipt.)

Wife: “Hold on a sec. I need to check something out.”

(The wife walks away from the till to do some more shopping. Her husband and I are just standing at the till, dumbfounded. Seconds turned into minutes, with no conclusion in sight.)

Husband: “All right, honey, I think that’s enough; let’s go.”

(The wife ignores her husband, and keeps shopping.)

Husband: “Honey, will you please come back to the till? Honey? Sweetheart? Babe? Princess? Please come back to the till. You’re keeping the nice man waiting. Honey, there’s a line forming behind us. Honey? Will you please come back? Honey? Honey? Honey? Dear? Sweetheart?”

(After all that, she’s still ignoring him.)

Husband: *to me* “Dude, don’t ever get married. It’ll ruin your life.”

(When the wife did come back, she acted as if she did nothing wrong. The nerve of some people.)

Related:
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 10
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 9
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 8

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A Bad Sign About This One

, | Sacramento, CA, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(A customer approaches my print center counter.)

Customer: “Hi! I’d like to order a sign for my business’s door, but I want it to be in full color.”

Me: “Sure! What size did you need the sign to be?”

Customer: “It’s a sign for my door. But in full color.”

Me: “Yes, that’s no problem. I just need to know what size you’d like to order.”

Customer: “IT’S A SIGN FOR MY DOOR. BUT I WANT IT TO BE IN FULL COLOR!”

Me: “Ma’am, I need a measurement. I have to tell the sign company what size you want them to make your sign.”

Customer: *holds up her smartphone* “If I show you a picture of my old sign, will that help? It’s on my door. But I want the new one to be in full color.”

(She eventually had to call her husband over, and HE informed us that the sign they wanted was 2”x10” in size.)

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Insert Inert

| MD, USA | Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Popular

(I am at a shoe shop that sells special inserts. I’m the only customer in the shop, and the only [visible] employee on duty is being very helpful.)

Me: “Thanks, so will these inserts do?”

Employee: “Yeah. Now, when you insert them in your shoes, remember to place it this way.” *he picks up a shoe and demonstrates* “With the arch placed where your foot’s arch will be. If you don’t put them in right, it could mess with your hips when you walk.”

Me: “Right… that’s fairly obvious, isn’t it?”

Employee: “Oh, you’d be surprised at the people I’ve seen. One lady came back to the shop complaining about pain in her legs, and it turned out she’d put in her inserts completely backward. I was kind of impressed with how she managed to squeeze the inserts inside those shoes without noticing they didn’t fit that way. So, now I make sure customers know how to put them in correctly. I’m not taking any chances with my job ever again.”