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Common Sense On A Diet

, | Chicago, IL, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(A few friends and I are in the car driving home from the city. We pull into [Fast Food Restaurant]. I pull up far enough for my friend in the back seat to order.)

Friend: “I’ll like a number five with no pickles and a [Soda #1], a number seven with a [Soda #2], two large fries, and a diet water.”

Person Taking Order:  “What was that last part?”

Friend: “Two large fries and a diet water.”

Person Taking Order:  “One moment, please.”

(The person taking the order forgets to mute his headset. We hear him asking another coworker if they carry diet water. His coworker starts laughing hysterically.)

Person Taking Order:  “Please pull up to the window”

(I pulled up to the window to see that the person that took the order was bright red and highly embarrassed for not realizing what he asked his coworker for. His coworker was still laughing hysterically and struggling to stand back up in the background. I tried my best not to laugh even though everyone in the car was in tears from laughing so much.)

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The Gift Of Giving Was Lost On Them

| Greenwood, IN, USA | Money, Non-Dialogue

I worked my way through college waiting tables at an Applebee’s in a mall just south of Indianapolis. The money wasn’t great, but it was enough and I needed a job with really flexible hours.

One evening, I’m given a five-top that’s a couple of parents and their three boys. I come by to introduce myself and the father introduces himself as a local minister there with his family. He mentions they’ve been given a $500 gift card from his congregation. I set about taking care of them and they go for a good sized meal; drinks, a few shared appetizers, main courses and even desserts.

All things considered, they aren’t a terrible table, but I did have to push two tables together which made my section smaller.

At the end the minister asks about using the gift card and I tell him it works just like a credit card. I run it through and return the slip. I hand it to him and he shakes my hand and tells me what an excellent job I did for him and his family and then they’re all out the door. I go back to help bus the table and pick up the credit card slip.

When I find it, I see it’s been signed with a big zero for the tip. I turn and watch them walk to their car out the window in total amazement. I got a hand shake for how well I’d done serving them their free meal and they didn’t give me a cent.

I know it’s not the worst burn — I’d seen people get worse — but it was the first time I was dumbstruck by getting stiffed.

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In The Days Before The Phantom Was A Menace

| OH, USA | Geeks Rule

(This takes place before the newer Star Wars movies came out (Episodes One, Two, and Three). I am cashing out customers at the front register. A man and woman come up.)

Me: “Hello. How was everything?”

Man: “It was great, young Jedi!”

Me: *dumbfounded*

Man & Woman: *chuckle*

Me: “All right… here is your change. Oh, and I’m not going to tell you to have a nice day… instead, I’m going to say…”

Me & The Man: “May the Force be with you.”

All Three: *chuckles*

Man: “Have a good day!”

(That made me smile.)

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Complaining To Have Nothing To Complain About, Part 2

| Long Island, NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Popular

Me: “Hi, welcome to [Restaurant]. What can I get you today?”

Customer: “I’ve had a really bad day so far! I’ll have a double shot espresso with extra cream.”

Me: “Oh, no! I’ll make sure to give your order extra attention to try and cheer you up.”

Customer: “Thank you!”

(I make her coffee, and place it down on her table.)

Customer: “Wow, that was quick!”

Me: “Yeah, and just so you know, there’s cream and sugar on the table over by the entrance.”

Customer: “Thanks again.”

(About five minutes later she starts screaming at my coworker.)

Customer: “I DEMAND TO SPEAK TO [My Name]! RIGHT THIS INSTANT!”

Coworker: *on the verge of tears* “I’ll go get him…”

Customer: “These people…”

(My coworker comes over to me.)

Coworker: “[My Name], [Customer] wants you…”

Me: “I know…”

(I walk to her and she immediately starts yelling at me.)

Customer: “THIS COFFEE IS BETTER THAN I EXPECTED! I DEMAND A COMPENSATION DRINK!”

Me: “Isn’t it good if the drink is better than you expected?”

Customer: “NO!”

Related:
Complaining To Have Nothing To Complain About

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A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 3

, | Pensacola, FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Popular

(At 30 minutes until close, a customer calls in to order a pepperoni, bacon, and extra cheese pizza. I let her know that I have a pepperoni prepped (not baked yet) and ask if she would mind having extra pepperoni without any cost. She agrees, I make her order, and I send her the food. An hour after close, as I’m about to walk out the door, I get a call. I pick it up to let whoever is calling know that we close early on weeknights, and this conversation follows:)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]! I apologize, but we close at 11 on weeknights.”

Customer: “Hey! I ordered a pizza from you guys and it was really greasy! I want one that’s less greasy!”

Me: “I apologize for the inconvenience but we’re already closed.” *look up her order history and see she has a complaint and credit for all of her orders*

Customer: “Well, I want a credit! You should’ve told me it would have been greasy!”

Me: “I should have told you a double pepperoni, bacon, and extra cheese pizza was going to be greasy?”

Customer: “Yes!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I can’t credit your account. It seems you have a note here that says we’ve issued too many credits in the past. I apologize, but there’s nothing I can do for you today.”

Customer: “What?! That is OUTRAGEOUS. I have never complained in my life!”

Me: “The last time you ordered you had wings and said they were raw. Our wings come in precooked and we heat them when you order them.”

Customer: “They were RAW! You were trying to give me SALMONELLA!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we’re closed and I won’t be able to help you today.”

Customer: “You f****** b****! I’m going to let your manager now and you’ll be FIRED!”

Me: “Ma’am, I am the manager.”

(The customer hung up and we didn’t get another order from her again.)

Related:
A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 2
A Hot Slice Of Justice

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