A Big Gap In Their Knowledge

| Brisbane, QLD, Australia | Right | July 27, 2015

Me: “Hi—”

Customer: *cuts in* “Hey, I see a couple outside eating this thing. I don’t know what’s the name of it.”

Me: “Um… could you please describe it to me?”

Customer: “I don’t know how to describe it, it’s a… it’s a big thing.”

Me: “…”

Customer: “I want it!”

Me: “…”

Cappuccino-no

, | SA, Australia | Right | July 27, 2015

(I’m waitressing when one of our baristas calls me over. She asks me to go to one of the tables and confirm that the elderly customer had ordered a long black and a cappuccino, as she had forgotten to write it down. The customer confirms this, and I take the order out to the customer and her husband who has now joined the table.)

Me: “Okay, long black?”

Customer: “Thank you.”

Me: “And your cappuccino, sir.”

Customer: “That was supposed to be a flat white!”

Me: “I’m so sorry; I thought I confirmed with you that it was a cappuccino.”

Customer: “Yes, but I forgot what my husband usually orders!”

(The husband spoke up and half-heartedly told me a cappuccino will do. I apologised again and then walked off wondering what part I had to be sorry for!)

A Sudden Change In Attitude

, | USA | Right | July 27, 2015

(I’m taking money in the drive-thru.)

Me: “Hello, sir, your total was $10.03.”

Customer: *shoves a stack of bills in my hands* “That’s 11.”

Me: “All right.” *I proceed to count the bills*

Customer: “What are you doing? You don’t need to count them! I told you there were 11, so just type in 11 and give me my change!”

Me: “Sir, I have to check to see how much money you handed me. Even if you tell me I still have to count it.”

Customer: That’s bulls***! How can you be so distrusting? I’m not trying to scam you. If I say I gave you 11, then I gave you 11 dollars! God, you’re so rude. I can’t believe this.”

Me: “I’m sorry sir. Here’s $1.97 for your change.”

Customer: “Wait, what?”

Me: “You gave me 12. Not 11. That’s why I count everyone’s money. More often than not, people give me too much money by accident.”

Customer: “Oh… yeah. Thanks, I guess.”

(That wasn’t the first time I’ve had this conversation, and I’m sure it won’t be the last.)

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Mickey Maus

| Atascadero, CA, USA | Romantic | July 26, 2015

(My boyfriend and I are just leaving a restaurant after dinner. Over the course of the weekend we have had several different conversations about WWII Japan and the U.S.S.R. about war atrocities and the experiments they performed.)

Boyfriend: “Okay, lets talk about something different, something happy. Like Disneyland!”

Me: *absentmindedly* “Yeah… like Mickey, Goofey and Donald going in with shotguns and blowing them away…”

(My boyfriend starts laugh and smiling as he grabs me in a hug.)

Boyfriend: “And this is why I love you!”

Running Afoul Of The Customer

| USA | Right | July 26, 2015

(I work in the drive-thru of a fast food restaurant. The day before, I tripped and fell while jogging. As a result, all the skin on my knuckles, my palms, my elbows, and my right cheek is gone. I’m heavily bandaged for aesthetic and sanitary reasons. I’ve been fielding questions all day about them. A guy drives up to pay for his order.)

Customer: “Wow, what happened to you?”

Me: “I had a jogging accident.”

Customer: “A jogging accident?”

Me: “Yeah, I tripped over my own two feet and landed hard.”

Customer: “That sucks. You need a better cover story.”

Me: “What?”

Customer: “Tell people you fell off the back of a motorcycle. That’s so much cooler!”

Me: “…”

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