Too Much Gravy For The Brain, Part 2

| Scotland, UK | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

Customer: “Could I get the whisky gravy without whisky please?”

Me: “Of course, I’ll ask the chef to make your dish with plain gravy.”

Customer: “No! I don’t want plain gravy! I want the whisky gravy without the whisky!”

Me: “Sir, the whisky gravy without whisky is just plain gravy.”

(This goes on for a minute or two. The customer’s wife turns and whispers to me.)

Customer’s Wife: “Just bring him plain gravy; it’ll take him a while to figure it out.”

Related:
Too Much Gravy For The Brain

She Also Speaks Ironic

, | Brisbane, QLD, Australia | At The Checkout, Bigotry, Language & Words, Top

(I manage a fast food restaurant. I’m currently serving a customer who is from East Asia. She is clearly new to the country, as she is having significant trouble with the transaction, and I’m finding it difficult to communicate. My coworker steps in.)

Coworker: “Excuse me, where are you from?”

Asian Customer: “I am from Korea.”

(Suddenly, the next customer in line speaks up.)

Customer: “Racist! You’re a racist!”

Coworker: “Excuse me, ma’am?”

Customer: “I said you’re a racist! It doesn’t matter where this young lady comes from, she should be welcome in your store. You should feel ashamed!”

(The shouting customer turns to me.)

Customer: “You! Do something about her!”

Me: “I absolutely agree. You see, my coworker here is studying a master’s degree in Asian studies. She was just asking because she could process this transaction in Korean, Japanese, Mandarin, Cantonese or Indonesian, and didn’t want to look like an idiot by making an assumption about someone she didn’t know.”

Work Hard, Break A Leg

, | Phoenix, AZ, USA | Food & Drink, Health & Body

(I’m currently recovering from a broken leg. I am at work getting my schedule for the week. As I’m walking out the door, a customer entering the restaurant shoves the door open and hits me right in my bad leg. I fall to the floor, crumple over in pain, and the customer literally steps right over me without a word, as if nothing has happened and I am just in her way. She goes to order at the counter which is being manned by my manager, who has seen the whole thing happen.)

Manager: “You need to leave.”

Customer: “Why, because I hit that idiot? He was in my way.”

Manager: “Yes. That’s one of my employees, and he just had surgery on the leg you hit.”

Customer: “Well he shouldn’t have been standing there!”

Me: “I was trying to open the door and leave; I wasn’t just standing in front of the door.”

Customer: “That’s hardly my problem. Now take my order.”

Manager: “We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone, especially self-centered morons. Now get the h*** out of my store.”

Customer: “F*** you and f*** [restaurant chain]!”

(The customer storms out, literally walking right over me again.)

Manager: “[My name], why don’t you go ahead and take tomorrow off? I’ll cover for you.”

Me: “Thanks, I’m probably gonna need it!”