Here Today, (Not) Gone Tomorrow

, | Melbourne, Australia | Extra Stupid

(A man approaches the counter.)

Me: “Hello, sir, what can I get for you today?”

Customer: “Yes, I was wondering what days you guys are closed.”

Me: “We’re open everyday.”

Customer: “Yes, but which days aren’t you open?”

Me: “None. We are open every day.”

Customer: *irritated* “Are you deaf? Which days AREN’T you open?”

Me: “Sir, we are open on days that end with the letter Y.”

Customer: “Right! So you’re open 4 days a week! Why didn’t you just say that?”

The Rewards Of Hard Work

| British Columbia, Canada | Bigotry, Food & Drink

(At our store, we have this point card where if you get 10 points, you get a free drink. Unfortunately, if a customer has more than one card, we aren’t allowed to combine the points together.)

Customer: *throws four cards in front of me* “Check these.”

Me: “Wait, what?”

Customer: “Check them! I want you to combine the points together. I should I have a free drink now.”

Me: “Sorry, but we aren’t allowed to combine the poi—”

Customer’s friend: “What’re you waiting for? She’s a customer! You have to do as we say. Hurry up and give us our free drink.”

Me: “I’m sorry. As I was trying to say before, we can’t combine card points.”

Customer: “Oh, well, just use the one that has the most points on it.”

Me: *proceeds to check each card*

Customer’s friend: “Hurry up! You’re Chinese! You have to work faster!”

(Once we’ve finished dealing with the customers, my co-worker comes up to me.)

Coworker: “Man those two were just…really annoying. I’m surprised you didn’t tell that guy off.”

Me: “Ah, it’s okay. I just used the card with the fewest points.”

Illegal Tender

, | Australia | Criminal & Illegal, Food & Drink

(I work late at night at a well-known fast food chain. We often get customers who are a little bit under the influence at night.)

Me: “That comes to $23.95, thanks.”

(The customer goes through his wallet and pockets and comes up about $5 short.)

Customer: “Do you want to buy some weed off me so I can pay for this order?”

Mentally Closed Down

| Goodyear, AZ, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(It’s a little after 10:00 PM and two customers walk in.)

Me: “Welcome to [restaurant]! Two tonight?”

Customer: “Are you about to close?”

Me: “No, we are open 24 hours.”

Customer: “Oh…” *to his friend* “Let’s go then, dude.”

Some Are Born Deaf To Manners

| Arkansas, USA | Bigotry, Food & Drink, Top

(We employ a deaf, hard-working lady at our restaurant.)

Customer: *agitated* “Excuse me, are you the manager?”

Me: “Yes, sir, how can I help you?”

Customer: “That employee over there ignored me. I asked for help, even yelled, and she just walked right by. She is rude!”

Me: “Sir, she is deaf.”

Customer: “That doesn’t matter! Your employees must answer when I call!”

Me: “Sir, she is deaf. She can’t hear you at all. Even if you got her attention, she wouldn’t respond unless you use sign language or let her read your lips.”

Customer: “Well, then why does she work here?”

Me: “Because she is a hard worker and does her job well.”

Customer: “Well, you shouldn’t hire rude people!”

Me: *shaking my head*

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