I worked as a waitress for several years, so I have a lot of stories, but this is one I could not wrap my head around. It started off normal. I sat the customer at the table, delivered drinks, and then asked for their order.
Customer: “I’ll get the bacon and egg meal.”
Me: “All right, and how would you like your eggs done?”
Customer: “Basted.”
Me: “Okay, basted soft, medium, or hard?”
Customer: “Basted.”
Me: “Yes, I have basted noted, but would you like it to be basted soft, medium, or hard?”
Customer: “I just want them basted.”
Me: “Okay, but would you like the yolk to be runny, solid, or in between?”
Customer: “I don’t know. Runny maybe.”
Me: “Okay.”
I finish taking the rest of the order and send it to the kitchen. When the order is ready, I double-check it and the eggs are as requested. I bring out the order to the table and the customer gets really quiet staring at his plate.
Me: “All right, here’s your bacon and egg breakfast. Can I refill your coffee?”
The customer doesn’t say anything; he just keeps staring at his plate.
Me: “Sir, more coffee? Anything else I can grab for you?”
The customer still doesn’t respond, so I double-check to make sure the table has ketchup, salt, pepper, etc. Everything seems fine.
Me: “Okay… Well, enjoy your meal.”
I start to back away and the customer finally looks at me.
Customer: “How am I supposed to enjoy it when you screwed it up?”
Me: “I’m sorry? Uh, what appears to be wrong with it?”
I am looking closely but it’s exactly what he ordered.
Customer: “Ugh! I ordered basted eggs, not this s***!”
Me: “Sir, those are basted. They’re basted soft so the yolk is still runny.”
I figure maybe they are upset because the top of the egg shook slightly as it was put down on the table and they actually want medium or hard.
Customer: “No, this is not a basted egg. I specifically asked for a basted egg because it’s the closest thing to a poached egg you guys offer!”
Me: “Uh, sir, we do offer poached eggs here. Would you like me to take your eggs back and get some poached ones, instead?”
Customer: “No, you don’t do poached eggs here.”
Me: “I can assure you we do. We even have eggs benedict on the menu, which requires poached eggs. If you want, I can get some for you instead of basted eggs.”
Customer: “There’s no use lying. I know what you serve. I’m here all the time.”
This is the first time I’ve seen the customer and I’ve been here full-time for five years. I know all the regulars.
Customer: “You must be new here if you don’t even know you don’t have poached eggs or that these eggs aren’t basted!”
Me: “Sir, I assure you that these eggs are basted as per your request, and we do have poached eggs, as well, if you would prefer those.”
Customer: “No, you don’t, and how are you going to fix this? My breakfast is ruined now!”
Mind you, he still has not even picked up a fork to touch the meal.
Me: “Sir, there’s not a lot I can do here. Those eggs are basted soft just like you asked for. I’ve already offered to replace them with poached since that’s what you really wanted. If you don’t want to accept that, then I can get the eggs made in a different way, or you can just accept the basted ones you have.”
I’ll admit I am starting to lose my temper a little and am a little sharper than I should be.
Customer: “Fine, I’ll eat these, but next time, make sure to actually bring basted eggs when I ask for them.”
For the rest of his meal, the customer ignored me any time I went to the table to check up or offer a coffee refill or bring the check. At the end of the meal, when he went to pay, he complained to my manager (who runs the till) that their server “didn’t know what a basted egg was” and how ridiculous it is that “we don’t serve poached eggs.” Even the manager could not convince him that we do.
