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Tipped To Be An Interesting Closing

| Chicago, IL, USA | Awesome Customers, Money

(It is after closing after a LONG day waitressing. I was stiffed on a tip by a large party that I was really nice to, and am in a bad mood. I am helping my friend clear the bar when a woman from the party comes up and starts knocking frantically on the front door. She can’t see me, and I contemplate just not answering for a moment.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, we’re closed for the night.”

Woman: “Oh, thank heaven, it’s you!” *she looked a little manic*

Me: “Um, yes? Did you forget something at your table?”

Woman: “Yes! Your tip! I thought my sister was paying it, but she paid for the drinks, instead of my brother, who I thought was paying for the drinks, but he didn’t pay for anything!”

Me: “Huh?” *long day, and this woman is hyper*

Woman: “HERE!”

(She shoved a wad of cash in my hand and darted out. They ended up tipping about 40% on a three-figure bill. I was really glad I answered the door.)

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In A Late-Night Pickle

, | USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Time

(The restaurant I work at used to be open 24 hours but now we close at 1 am. This has been going on for 5 or 6 months now. All the signs around the building have been changed to reflect this. The outside lights are off and the only employees are myself doing paperwork and the person getting the place ready for the morning shift. I get a call at 1:50 am.)

Me: “[Restaurant].”

Caller: “I’m at the drive-thru but no one is taking my order.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we are closed right now.”

Caller: “But you’re supposed to be open right now. Google says you are 24 hours.”

Me: “We have not been 24 hours for a few months now.”

Caller: “But you’re still here.”

Me: “Everything has been put a way for the night and I’m just here to finish up for the day.”

Caller: “Can I just have some pickles?”

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Your Joke Is A Complete Turkey

, | OK, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(Two customers come in looking for something quick so they don’t miss their flight.)

Customer: “How about a turkey sandwich?”

Me: “Sure, that’ll be super quick.”

Customer: “And could you add bacon to it?”

Me: “Well, I could, but that would take a while. We make all our food fresh.”

Customer: *being a smart-a*** “Oh, really? So you’ve got a live turkey back there?”

Me: *just smiles but slowly dying on the inside*

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Have No Reservations About Stealing Reservations

| Boston, MA, USA | Bad Behavior, Liars & Scammers

(I am working as a host in an upscale restaurant on a busy Friday night. As we have a large number of reservations – including one reservation for 12 people – we are currently not accepting any walk-in customers. Four men approach me.)

Me: “Good evening! Welcome to [Restaurant]. How can I help you?”

Guy #1: “Yeah, Hi. Erm, there’s 15 of us meeting here, so…”

Me: *cringing* “Do you happen to have a reservation?”

Guy #2: “Maybe under [Name]? Probably not, though.”

Me: *checking the system* “Unfortunately, I have no reservation for that name and, as we are pretty busy tonight, I can’t accept any more walk-in customers until at least [two hours later]. I am so sorry!”

Guy #1: “Oh… erm, well, we weren’t the ones organizing this so when the rest arrive we will ask if they made a reservation.”

Me: “Okay, no problem, but I don’t see a reservation for that amount of people in the system… The largest I have is for 12 people.”

Guy #2: “Okay, cool. Let us get back to you on it!”

(The rest of the group arrives around five minutes later and a lady approaches me. She stands behind me as she talks to me, facing the computer which is not completely unusual to do.)

Lady: “Hi. I have a reservation for 12 people but I have 15 here now. We want to be seated now.”

Me: *panicking because the restaurant is nearly at full capacity* “Oh… sure, what was the name on the reservation?”

Lady: “It’s on the screen behind you! [Name]!”

Me: “Perfect! Just give me a minute to set your table up.”

(I sit them down and just about manage to grab another table for the extra people that had arrived. The group has been nothing but rude and dismissive of me the entire time. Ten minutes later another lady approaches the host stand.)

Me: “Good evening and welcome to [Restaurant]!”

Lady #2: “Good evening! I have a reservation for 12 people under the name [Name]. We are ten minutes late and only 10 have made it! Sorry about the inconvenience.”

Me: *gesturing* “Oh! I believe I already sat your group just over there.”

Lady #2: “Um… I don’t think so. I don’t know anyone at that table.”

Me: *paling* “Oh… If you could just give me one moment, I will arrange a table for you.”

Lady #2: *shows me emailed confirmation of reservation and laughing* “Did that table steal our reservation?”

Me: “It appears that a mistake was made. However, it’s no problem as I can seat you also!”

(It turned out the first group did in fact steal the reservation as the server overheard them bragging about their ingenuity. Thankfully, the second group found the whole situation funny and I was able to seat them anyway, even with a busy restaurant!)

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Allergic To Common Sense, Part 10

| Charleston, SC, USA | Crazy Requests, Health & Body

(I am a cashier at a restaurant. We are a small business and the owners are still working on the perfect way to run the business. A couple walks in and orders at the counter as usual. After finding a table, the woman returns to the counter.)

Customer: “Excuse me; do you have any larger chairs? My husband is too large to fit in these.”

(I know we don’t have any, but I go in the back to ask the owner for advice anyway. I return to the counter with no real solution.)

Me: *”No, ma’am. We don’t have any larger chairs; I’m sorry for your husband’s discomfort.”

Customer: “Okay, thanks anyway.”

(She goes back to her table, visibly upset. The husband returns to fill his drink, and I notice he is wearing an adult bib. They eat all their food with seemingly no complaints. They talk for a few minutes, and then the wife returns to the counter.)

Customer: “Excuse me, I’m having an allergic reaction. Is the manager around?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. Let me go grab the owner for you.”

Owner: “What’s wrong, ma’am ?”

Customer: “My throat is itchy. I’m allergic to something in your food. Could you name the ingredients for me?”

Owner: *names every ingredient in the food she and her husband has eaten*

Customer: “I’m not allergic to any of that.”

Owner: “I’m sorry, ma’am, then you didn’t have an allergic reaction here.”

Customer: *becoming more angry by the second* “I said my throat is itchy and I’m having an allergic reaction! Don’t you care at all about your customers?”

Owner: “Would you like me to call an ambulance?”

Customer: “No! I’m fine! We were just leaving!”

(She pulled her husband out the door. He seemed indifferent to her “allergic reaction.” He even waved to us on the way out.)

Related:
Allergic To Common Sense, Part 9
Allergic To Common Sense, Part 8
Allergic To Common Sense, Part 7

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