Mamaaaa, Just Killed A… You…
I’m a manager. I get a call from an employee.
Employee: “I can’t come in today; my mom died.”
I offer my condolences and tell her to take the time off that she needs. Less than an hour later, I get another call, this time anonymously.
Anonymous Caller: “I know [Employee] called you to tell you that her mom died. She’s lying.” *Click*
This makes me a little suspicious. While mostly okay, [Employee] does have a habit of calling in often. In the meantime, word has got around, and the office has collected an envelope of money to help with the costs of the funeral and missing work. I call the number I have on the employee’s file to send my regards and get an address to send flowers.
Me: “Hello. Can I speak to [Employee], please?”
Person: “She’s in Vegas with her friends for the weekend. This is her mother. Can I take a message?”
Me: “You’re her mother? You’re [Employee]’s mother?”
Person: “That’s right.”
Me: “And… she’s gone to Vegas for the weekend?”
Person: “Yes! Why are you repeating back everything I’m saying?”
Me: “I’m just… very relieved to hear that you’re okay!”
I explain, and her mother is shocked to find out her daughter used her death as an excuse to go to Vegas for the weekend.
When [Employee] returns, I hold a big meeting with everyone in the office and present her with the envelope of money and flowers. She actually takes it and fake-cries. I call her into my office to reveal:
Me: “We all know your mom’s alive. There’s no actual money in that envelope.”
Employee: *Changing her demeanor entirely* “Ugh… I don’t give a f***.”
She threw the flowers into the trash and stormed out, shouting that she quit to everyone laughing at her.


