Way back in the day, I used to be a VCR tech. We couldn’t really fix much in-store; we had to send it out. People were always wanting something fixed but didn’t want to pay too much to fix it, since you could buy a new one for a cost similar to our repair costs.
Customer: “I hear you guys fix VCRs? I’ve got mine here, so… can you take a look?”
Me: “We can take a look, but we can’t give you an exact quote until we’ve opened it up and identified the problem.”
Customer: “Fine. Call me when you do.”
We take it in, and I call him when I’ve identified the problem and tell him the repair cost.
Customer: “That’s so much! I’m not paying that!”
Me: “I understand, sir. Please come back to collect your VCR.”
But he doesn’t. I have to make phone calls every couple of days to people that have things there to be picked up. I call this guy at least two times a week for months.
We can destroy a customer’s item if we follow a specific procedure: send out a first, second, and final warning through certified mail. I send these out every week. Because our customer service department gets the mail, and sucks at giving me the return receipts, it takes me most of a year to get receipts of all three letters.
Usually, when we destroy one, we smash it with a hammer and throw it in the compactor. Sometimes, I let someone who is upset with a customer smack one with the hammer. Not this one. I take it apart. Every single screw, every piece. I keep the VCR heads as a trophy.
Eventually, this a**hole shows up to pick it up.
Me: “Wait here, sir.”
I go and get the stack of paperwork that I sent and all the call logs, and I get my manager, just in case. I then tell the customer the story, showing him the paperwork, and the customer promptly loses his s***.
Customer: “I want a new one!”
Manager: “No. That’s not going to happen.”
Customer: “There isn’t anything left of it?”
I snatch up the trophy.
Me: “I think this is a piece of it. Want it?”
He stormed out, but it felt so good to have that name off my list!
