Refunder Blunder, Part 45

, , , , , | Right | May 15, 2020

I work in the dispute department for a credit card company. The amount of people who think that they don’t have to give a product back to get their money back is astounding.

Me: “Disputes, this is [My Name].”

Customer: “Yeah, I bought the wrong item from this merchant and I just want my money back.”

Me: “Not a problem, [Cardholder]. Have you returned the item to the merchant?”

Customer: “No. Why would I need to do that?”

Me: “Well, [Cardholder], the only way that we can file a dispute is if the merchant is refusing to refund your money after they get their product back.”

Customer: “Well, if I give them their product back I won’t have any leverage to get my refund.”

Me: *Dies inside*

Refunder Blunder, Part 44
Refunder Blunder, Part 43
Refunder Blunder, Part 42

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She’s Not In Controller Here

, , , , | Right | May 15, 2020

A “Karen” type woman — middle-aged with a permanent scowl etched on her face — comes up to the counter in a huff with her ten-year-old-looking son. She plops down an Xbox One controller on the counter, in its box, and forks over the receipt.

Customer: “I want to return it because it doesn’t work. I want my money back.”

Me: “Do you have a rewards account?”

She gives me her information and I pull up her account. As I look over her receipt, I notice that it is a new controller, it was not purchased under her account, the warranty was declined, and it is past the thirty-day exchange policy. I explain this to her.

Me: “The best I can do is run the controller through our test system, trade it in as a defective, and put the money towards a different controller, as is our store policy on such matters.”

She won’t accept this, and now I’ve got about five people in line waiting on me. My manager is out sick, so I call another store to see what their take is, already knowing what policy is, and the manager of that store tell me exactly that. When I tell her what the other store manager told me, she starts fuming.

Customer: “Get your manager!”

Me: “I am the manager on duty.”

Customer: “Get your manager on the phone!”

Me: “She can’t answer because she is on medical leave and currently in surgery.”

Customer: “Get the assistant manager on the phone!”

I go to the back room to call her. She tells me what I am doing is right, but if the customer simply won’t accept it to just refund it back to her as a store credit, technically breaking policy. I go back and say exactly that, but she is still fuming.

Customer: “I wanted the refund in cash! I won’t leave the store until I get it!”

Even under all the stress, I held my resolve. I was kind and courteous, but also firm on what I could and could not do. And when she stood there, holding up the line like a petulant child, I had had enough. I gave her her receipt and her gift card and told her that was all I was authorized to do.

Then, I called to the next customer behind her that I could help them. She gave me the death glare, and I looked her straight in the eyes as she was forced to move over for the other customer.

I never saw her or heard from her, and she didn’t even leave me a bad review!

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This Policy Is No Joke

, , , , | Right | May 14, 2020

After talking to a woman dissatisfied with her order over the phone, she comes down to the store to get her refund.

Me: “I am really sorry about the sandwich; our toaster just doesn’t toast the sub bun like it should.”

Customer: “I don’t f****** care; just give me my money back.”

She hands me a single sandwich and her receipt showing she bought another meal in addition to her food.

Me: “Due to policy, I can only refund you for what you brought back, not the whole order.”

Customer: “It’s called ‘refund me my entire meal.’”

Me: *Pause* “No, it’s called ‘store policy.’”

I refund her as she throws a fit.

Customer: “This is a joke! I am never coming back here again!”

I have a huge smile on my face.

Me: “No joke, just policy.”

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The Card Will Expire Before You’re Done

, , , , , | Right | May 6, 2020

I’m working the returns and customer service desk at a home improvement store when an elderly lady comes in with a thick accent and a return. I process the return, which was paid with debit, so it goes back to her debit card.

Customer: “What do I do?”

Me: “Just put your chip card in the machine and follow the prompts. It’s just like making a purchase except I’m giving you money.”

She puts in her card and I turn my back. I don’t want to be accused of trying to spy on her PIN code. 

I hear the machine beep and a small receipt spits out. The transaction was cancelled.

Customer: “I’m done?”

I turn back to the customer:

Me: “Looks like it was cancelled by accident; let’s just try that again.”

I reset the machine.

Customer: “What do I do?”

Me: “Just put your chip card in the machine and—”

The customer hits “Cancel.”

Customer: “I have my money?”

Me: “No, looks like we’re just having some technical problems. One more time, chip in the bottom.”

I reset it again. The customer puts the card in the machine.

Customer: “Now what?”

Me: “It’s just like when you use it to buy. Press ‘Yes.’ The amount is correct.”

I reach over and press “Yes.”

Me: “Now, just select the account: chequing or savings—”

The customer hits “Cancel.”

Customer: “Do I get a receipt?”

Out of the corner of my eye, I see my supervisor shaking slightly. I reset the machine, yet again.

Me: “Of course, as soon as we finish your return. Let me just come around and see what’s going on.”

Customer: “What do I do?”

Me: “Let’s just put the card back in the machine. Now, don’t hit the big red button. Then, ‘Yes,’ the amount is good, so just select the account: chequing or savings.”

Customer: “…”

Me: “Chequing or savings?”

Customer: “Chaving!”

The customer hits “Cancel.” I see my supervisor shaking hard, covering her mouth, and slipping into the office just behind us. I reset the machine.

Me: “One more time. We’ll get this. Just select the account: chequing or savings.”

Customer: “Just select the… chaving.”

Me: “Just press the button for the account.”

I have my hand over the keypad so she can’t hit “Cancel” now.

Customer: “…”

Me: “Just press the button for—”

Customer: *Still not moving* “Chaving.”

I take a stab and press “Chequing.”

Me: “Great! Now just enter your PIN and hit the green enter button.”

She enters her PIN and… “Cancel.”

Customer: “You give me money now?”

Me: “Not just yet. We’ll get it this time for sure.”

We get to the PIN. I’m watching like a hawk now, privacy be d***ed!

Me: “So, enter your PIN.”

The customer enters her PIN and I slap my hand over the PIN pad. 

Me: “Is that your whole PIN?”

Customer: “Yes.”

I take a deep breath and press “Enter,” fearing and hoping at the same time. Transaction complete and the receipt spits out.

Customer: “You give me money now?”

Me: “Yep, it’s been put back to your debit card, just the way you paid.”

I hand her the receipts with all the cancelled copies and bid her a good day. I’m standing there, dumbfounded by what I’ve just seen and just glad it’s over, when my supervisor comes out.

Supervisor: “I’m sorry, I had to leave before I burst out laughing. How did she buy the stuff in the first place?!”

Me: “How did she find her way back to the store?”

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That Weedwhacker Needs To Be Put Out To Grass

, , , , | Right | April 30, 2020

I am heading to the customer service desk when I see a man at the desk with a weedwhacker. It looks like it is absolutely covered in at least a quarter of an inch of grass clippings with a thicker coat on the actual trimmer head. I overhear this while signing in as a vendor.

Customer: “I need to return this.”

The employee takes a dubious look at the weedwhacker.

Employee: “Okay. Do you have a receipt for it?”

Customer: “Ah, naw. But you’ll still take it, right?”

Employee: “Well, yes, but I would need to see an ID.”

Customer: “What for? Why do I need to do that?!”

Employee: “It’s company policy, and would you mind if I ask why is it being returned?”

Customer: “F***, I didn’t even use the thing! Why you have to make it so d*** hard?”

He almost throws the ID at her. The employee picks it up and types up the weedwhacker’s brand.

Employee: “Oh. Okay. You have the option of a straight exchange or a gift card.”

Customer: “I want money!”

Employee: “I’m sorry, but it’s above the amount that we’re allowed to give in cash without a receipt. I can’t override it.”

Customer: “Never mind!”

He snatches his ID and stalks off, shedding grass clippings with every step.

Me: “‘Never used it,’ huh?”

Employee: “You think he would at least clean the thing before making that claim.”

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