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A Cool-Headed Manager Turneth Away Wrath

, , , | Healthy | CREDIT: rainbownator96 | November 26, 2020

I’m working the drive-thru at a pharmacy when an older patient who has occasionally been a handful pulls up. She has two prescriptions to fill and she hands me an empty tube of name-brand hydrocortisone cream.

Patient: “Can you get me another tube of this, too, please?”

Normally, we’re supposed to encourage patients to call ahead for curbside pickup, but we are slow and I am feeling nice. I leave the pharmacy, pick up the same tube, and add it to her order. The cream is about $6.

Later she comes in and starts complaining to the manager on duty.

Patient: “I bought this in the drive-thru earlier, and the employee there was rude to me, and she overcharged me! I demand that she be fired!”

She started generally causing a scene. Apparently, she wanted the store brand that was $3 cheaper. Surprisingly, after the manager reminded her that I was doing her a favor and I technically wasn’t supposed to leave the pharmacy to get over-the-counter products, she calmed down and left. I realize I could have been a bit friendlier, but I’m not a mind reader, lady.

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You’ve Heard Of The Dead Parrot Sketch, Now It’s Time For…

, , , , | Right | CREDIT: DangerMorg | November 26, 2020

It’s a week before Thanksgiving. While I am checking out customers, my supervisor hands me a frozen turkey.

Supervisor: “It needs to go back to the meat department. I’ll take over for you while you take it back.”

This is routine and I think nothing of it, so I accept and headed toward the meat department. I arrive at the frozen turkey selection and place a turkey down within the freezer. A friendly old lady walks up to me:

Old Lady: “Excuse me, do these turkeys get any bigger?”

Remembering a certain meme I had found, I chuckle and say:

Me: “No, ma’am, they’re dead.”

She laughs wholeheartedly along with me, and I tell her I’ll check with the meat department since I’m only a cashier and they’d have a larger turkey for her. She thanks me and I meet with the meat manager in their cooler and tell him about the customer. I then retire back to my post on the checkout line.

I would have forgotten about this altogether if it wasn’t for my manager calling me to her office to talk to me.

Manager: “We’ve got a complaint from a customer about you telling a joke. The customer said a joke about dead turkeys is insensitive towards the animal and that if you wouldn’t be making those jokes about people you shouldn’t do it with turkeys.

We both agree that it was kind of stupid and that I shouldn’t have done it, but she did find the joke funny so I think I got off easy with that one.

A few hours later I am on self-checkout when a lady approaches me, with a leather purse and fur coat.

Customer: “Why are you still here? I filed a complaint against you! You should’ve been fired for what you said!”

Everything had made sense to me at that point. This lady had overheard my joke with the older lady and had taken offense to it. She begins to berate me saying that if someone were to joke about my death I wouldn’t take kindly to it.

Me: *Politely retorting.* “Ma’am, I wouldn’t mind because I’d be dead.”

She starts fuming. With a smug confidence, she gets in my face:

Customer: “Would you kill me if I was a turkey?”

She then starts doing chicken motions and making chicken noises at me, and I can’t help but laugh. From the other self-checkout kiosks, I can see customers stifling giggles and pointing towards the chicken customer. Now finished with her poultry outburst, she repeats her question.

Customer: “If I was a turkey, would you kill me?”

While I am enjoying this tirade, all good things must come to an end so I begrudgingly tell her:

Me: “Ma’am, I’m gonna have to ask you to leave; you’re causing a disturbance to the other customers.”

She demands that I answer her question.

Me: “No, I wouldn’t kill you but I would call security if you do that again.”

Fortunately, she seems to be deterred, and as she walks towards the door she begins to yell the standard spiel like:

Customer: “I won’t ever shop here again until you get fired! Your soul will burn unless you repent you animal-killer!”

I can’t help but ask the question: why was someone like her in the meat department anyway?

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You Gotta Learn To Coexist

, , , , | Friendly | CREDIT: VenNeb21 | November 25, 2020

I live on the second floor of an apartment building in a college town, so there are lots of young people getting their first taste of “the real world”.

My neighbor below me comes to my door one day.

Neighbor: “I need you to keep the noise down.”

I am confused, since I’m a rather quiet person, until she explains that the “noise” is from me walking around my apartment. She doesn’t appreciate how loudly I walk in my own home.

All the apartments have wall-to-wall carpets except for the first floor. I remember something my uncle once told me about how, if you don’t want to hear people walking above you, then you need to live on the top floor.

Me: “If me walking in my own apartment bothers you, you shouldn’t have chosen to live on the first floor.”

Neighbor: “I have trouble with stairs, so I didn’t have a choice. You just need to be quieter when you’re walking around.”

Me: *Politely* “I’ll work on that.”

And I shut the door. I am not going to alter how I walk in my own apartment just for her and her attitude problem.

Oddly enough, though, shortly after this encounter, I broke my foot walking down the stairs. I would be on crutches for six weeks with a cast and then have a walking cast for several weeks more after that. This made it difficult to move around my apartment since my crutches would get caught in the carpet.

I found that it was easier to sit in my desk chair and push myself around my small apartment with my still functioning foot and arms. However, again, the problem here was the d*** carpet. The wheels would get stuck in the carpet and would cause me the occasional problem. This meant I would have to hop around my apartment if I couldn’t get the chair unstuck from the floor. I could hear her complaining sometimes, especially when I had my balcony door open and she was outside. I honestly didn’t care about her petty problems, but I was tired of hearing them.

Then, one day, I was trying to push myself across the apartment to the kitchen and the wheels got stuck. I had just given the chair a big push, right as it got caught, and I promptly fell out of the chair and onto the floor. I didn’t land gracefully, and I ended up with a huge bruise on the back of my leg from landing on the armrest of the chair. Needless to say, I was not in a good mood and I was in pain.

My lovely neighbor came upstairs not too long after this and to complain that I woke her from her nap with “that loud bang,” I answered the door sitting in the evil chair with my broken foot in plain view. I politely told her that the “loud bang” she heard was my body hitting the floor. In my best sugary-sweet, sarcastic voice, I told her that I appreciated her concern for my well-being and that I was fine. I then thanked her for coming by to check on me and slammed the door in her face.

She never bothered me again.

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“I Don’t Work Here,” Wholesome Edition!

, , , , , | Friendly | CREDIT: Mel9879875 | November 25, 2020

I am at a popular retail chain looking for a window air-conditioner for my small apartment. I have never bought one before, and I don’t have any idea of how many square feet my apartment is or how big an AC I will need.

This older gentleman is in the same aisle, wearing khakis and a blue shirt.

Me: “Excuse me, sir. Can you help me?”

Gentleman: “I don’t work here. But I can try!”

His wife then walked up next to him, and they spent a good ten minutes helping me figure out what would work the best for me. They were super nice and said they had a daughter around my age and would appreciate someone helping her if she was in a similar situation. I bought the AC they recommended, and it worked great for years. Not all “I don’t work here” stories are bad!

This story is part of our Feel Good roundup for November 2020!

Read the next Feel Good roundup story!

Read the Feel Good roundup for November 2020!

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Is Throwing Her Out The Window An Option?

, , , , | Friendly | CREDIT: sassy-cheese-cube | November 25, 2020

When I am fourteen, I have to go to Australia with my parents for my uncle’s wedding. To a fourteen-year-old me, that sounds pretty good. Little do I know that I will be encountering an entitled jerk on the plane.

Our seats are a bit far from each other, but I am okay with it. I sit next to a woman and her toddler, who is asleep. I offer one of those fake salutation smiles, but she just stares blankly at me. I think nothing of it. I just sit down and open my laptop and play some games. After a while of playing, I decide to do my summer homework, basically translating some English paragraphs into Hindi — I’m Indian.

I have not been thinking about the woman next to me, but suddenly:

Woman: “What do you think you are doing?!”

Me: “My assignment? I am a student.”

Woman: “Uh, no! You are a terrorist! That’s what you are!”

I just give her a confused look.

Woman: *To the air hostess* “Excuse me, miss! This is a very dangerous man; he is writing something in Afghanistan!”

Hostess: *Visibly sorry for me* “Ma’am, he is a child.”

Woman: “But he’s Pakistani!”

Me: “I’m Indian, and I’m just doing my homework—”


At this point, a gentleman stepped in and started full-on verbally attacking the woman. He called her out on her racism and called her a stupid b**** and an Islamophobe.

My angry parents came up, wanting to kill the woman.

The sleeping toddler woke up crying.


The airhostess reprimanded the woman, and most people of colour on the plane were trying to strangle her with their eyes. To my shock, the woman decided to shut up. She did not, however, apologise to me.

The air staff apologised profusely for the woman’s behaviour, and ultimately, they decided to give me an upgrade so that I didn’t have to sit with her. I was not scared, but I was really disappointed in the woman.

My family and I thanked the gentleman who interceded, and the rest of the trip went well.

People, be like that gentleman. Sir, if you’re reading this, thank you again!

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