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A collection of stories curated from different subreddits, adapted for NAR.

A Customer By Any Other Name Would Be As Frustrating

, , , | Right | CREDIT: kuduloka | April 10, 2021

I am working in the photo department of my store. For the past few weeks, we’ve been scrambling to keep up with the myriad of photo and Christmas card orders. Today was probably the most unusual customer pickup I’ve dealt with.

Most of the time, I get their name and order type and send them on their way.

Me: “Hi. Can I have your name?”

Customer: *Immediately* “I don’t know.”

Recognizing that this is not off to a great start, I am a bit flabbergasted at his following response.

Customer: “It could be under any of five aliases.”

Not names, aliases. To further my confusion, he gave me just given names for some, surnames for others. It finally took us taking down his order number, entering that into the computer, and finding what the prints looked liked to match them with a printed order. And it wasn’t under any of the names he’d given us.

Patience All Around!

, , , , | Right | CREDIT: Waifer2016 | April 9, 2021

I discover, much to my dismay, that I have lost my credit card. Where it wandered off to, I have no idea. The HOW it went missing is quickly solved with the discovery of a rather large hole in the card slot of my cell phone case. After a few minutes of panicked account checks to make sure all is okay, I relax and call my bank.

After ten minutes of battling the Interactive Voice Response system within their call center, I get through to an employee. He gives an opening spiel and introduces himself.

Me: “Hi, [Employee]! I lost my credit card.”

Employee: “Ohhh, crap, dude. That sucks!”

Me: “Yeah, it does. The sad thing is that this is the fourth one I’ve lost; it’s very sad.”

Employee: *Laughing* “I can relate. Okay, I need your bank account number.”

Me: “The number is [account number], my address is [address], and the bank is located on [Road].”

Employee: “Holy crap, you’re doing my job for me!”

Me: “Sadly not my first rodeo, [Employee].”

Employee: “I’m pulling up your account; one minute.”

Me: “No worries, the last two transactions are at [Store] and are legit.”

Employee: *Howling with laughter* “Oh, you’re awesome! You have all the questions down!”

Me: “No sense me being cranky about it.”

Employee: “Um, now comes the sucky part where I remind you to update all your auto payments, shopping accounts, and memberships.”

Me: “Arrrgh, you’re killing me, [Employee]! I forgot about that!”

He chuckles sympathetically.

Employee: “Okay, I canceled your card and reported it stolen for you. Anything else I can do?”

Me: “Yeah, have some chocolate for me, [Employee]; you deserve it.”

Employee: “You’ve made my day!”

And he laughed some more. I was dumb and lost my card again, but I made the poor bank dude smile. Win, right?

This story is part of our Feel Good roundup for April 2021!

Read the next Feel Good roundup for April 2021 story!

Read the Feel Good roundup for April 2021!

Should’ve Had Better Brain Filters

, , , , , | Learning | CREDIT: Zeldaspellfactory | April 8, 2021

Many years ago, my oldest child was in junior high. He took a computer class his first year in junior high. His teacher was interesting. On Parent-Teacher Night, she announced to all the students and parents that if a child in her class could hack the school’s Internet filters, they would get an automatic A for the entire year in the class. She even had this printed up on handouts she gave us parents.

My oldest child can be a challenge. I never wanted to be one of his schoolteachers. He just thinks of the most random things to do and then does them without thinking of consequences. (Thankfully, he has mostly grown out of this!) I could tell that my son was going to take her up on this “offer”/challenge. He was good enough with computers that I was pretty sure he could do it.

I warned the teacher that the school district did NOT want students hacking the Internet filters, especially not my son. Who knows what he would find that I didn’t want to know about?

Less than two weeks later, I was called up to the school on very little notice. My son was going to be expelled. That was all the info I had before I got to the school. I had a feeling it was about the computer class, so I brought in the handout the teacher gave out on Parent-Teacher Night.

I was right. He had hacked the Internet filters successfully, and because of this, the school was going to expel him. Permanently.

I had quite the chat with the principal. He was completely shocked that the teacher had challenged the students this way but claimed it didn’t matter because the school had rules that my son should have known. He was flabbergasted when I called the Superintendent of Schools for our city. He was more shocked when I chatted with him on a first-name basis. It might have been an entitled thing to do but messing with my kids brings out my inner Mama Bear.

My son did not get expelled; he didn’t get punished in any way, mostly because the teacher was an absolute idiot. I later learned that this was not the first time she had issued this challenge, nor the first time a student was able to do it. She had been warned not to do it again, ever, and she had ignored that.

They had a new teacher in under a week, because you are just not smart enough to teach school if you openly challenge kids to hack the school’s filters.

No Allowance For Such Nonsense

, , , , , | Working | CREDIT: SuspiciousAttitude71 | April 7, 2021

Earlier this summer, I temporarily took a job as a roofing salesperson for a construction company. The job description said I was managing a book of insurance agents and realtors, working referrals. In the interview, the boss was adamant that there was no door-knocking —just working relationships and referrals. I took the job and came to learn about week into my hire that they expected five or more hours a day of door-knocking. I could’ve quit right away but I figured I’d give it a go for a bit and just see how things went.

The job was full commission with a small weekly vehicle allowance, and I wasn’t responsible for working a regular schedule. But eventually, my boss started expecting everyone to work a regular schedule and report “at least forty hours” on our timecard app.

I fought with him about it because, as a non-hourly or non-salary employee, there was nothing to report. I got paid only for the work I brought in. Whether I worked eighty or five hours, the pay was the same and there was no contractual obligation to my time.

He got upset that I didn’t just give in and he told me that, because I hadn’t filled out a timecard, they wouldn’t give me my weekly vehicle allowance. It wasn’t a huge amount of money, but it was a matter of principle; I don’t get paid for time worked, so why do they need to know my hours?

My best friend is a labor attorney, and I asked him what I could do. He said I should just threaten to call the department of labor for withholding wages. So, I told my boss I’d call the department of labor. At this point, I was already in the process of getting hired for a job I really wanted, so I was planning on quitting soon anyway; I figured the company had it coming for all their lies and deceitful nature.

They agreed to give me the allowance. But then, later that day, Human Resources rolled out a policy that said that they would now be paying out the allowance based on hours logged on our timecard app. It was the expectation that we’d log forty hours, and if you didn’t meet forty hours, they would deduct a prorated amount from the vehicle allowance. The policy also said it was retroactive for the previous week. Therefore, I didn’t get my allowance for that week’s pay, as I continued to not log everything. I was a little pissed off about it.

That week, our boss made us work a great many more hours than usual, commuting several hours a day, each way, to a town he wanted us to get some work in. I went into our timecard app and logged my hours for the week — *a lot* more than forty. When the pay came that week, I only got the regular allowance — for “forty” hours. I asked my boss where the rest was, and he said it was a flat rate. I cited the new policy and said he owed me based on the “hours worked” and that I’d be calling the department of labor if I didn’t get it.

They ended up giving me the allowance based on my full logged hours. Later that week, Human Resources emailed the department saying that full commission people were exempt from logging hours and would be receiving the flat pay.

I won. I ended up quitting a short time later, followed by pretty much the whole sales staff.

The Well-Behaved Child Doesn’t Fall Far From The Tree

, , , , , | Related | CREDIT: LoneWolfWi13 | April 6, 2021

My grandmother (and my mother) are both extremely strict about not being interrupted while on the phone.

One year while visiting my grandmother, I decide to climb a large tree in her yard. I don’t know how high it is, but I am almost to the top. Now, being eleven, I naturally climb onto a dead branch, and it snaps.

I fall, plummeting to the ground. As soon as I realize I’m alive, I notice that I can’t quite move my left arm.

Me: *To my brother* “Go inside and tell Grandmother!”

My brother has Asperger’s and is a couple of years younger than me. He goes into the house, sits down, and waits. I’m sure it’s only a few minutes, but for me, it seems like an eternity.

Finally, my grandmother hangs up the phone.

Grandmother: “What’s the matter?”

Brother: “[My Name] fell out of a tree.”

At the hospital, a nurse asks me about the details. I tell them I lay there on the ground for a while after I fell.

Nurse: “Why?”

Brother: “I had to wait until Grandmother got off the phone to tell her about it.”

My grandmother had to explain to them what was going on. I do remember a social worker ushering them out of the room and asking some questions. After that, both Grandmother and Mother explained to us that if it’s an emergency, we need to tell them right away.