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A collection of stories curated from different subreddits, adapted for NAR.

If I’m Lyin’, My Son Is Dyin’

, , | Right | CREDIT: HenriquesDumbCousin | August 11, 2021

I work for a car rental company as an escalation agent. Basically, when a customer demands a supervisor, I take the call.

Customer: “I was going to cancel this reservation, and much to my surprise, when I clicked the cancel button, it said that I was going to be charged a fee.”

Me: “Can you please tell me why you’re cancelling the reservation?”

Customer: “I was going to take my son to a soccer tournament, so I paid for this rental, but another parent offered to take us to the tournament, so I don’t need the vehicle anymore.”

Me: “Is there a possibility that instead of cancelling the reservation, we could reschedule it for another location or time?”

Customer: “I would, but I don’t travel too often.”

Me: “I do apologize, ma’am, but if I were to cancel the reservation, there would be a cancellation fee.”

Customer: “But your agent never said there would be a cancellation fee. I specifically asked if I could cancel at any time and he said yes.”

Statements like that make me think that the customer isn’t being honest. She insists that she made all the “necessary” questions and that the agent never warned her about the consequences of cancelling the reservation.

Me: “I’m truly sorry, but my hands are tied.”

Customer: “Your hands aren’t tied. I’ve worked for customer service for like a million years. Well, maybe not that long, but I know you can do something about the fee.”

Me: “Uhhh…”

Customer: “I used to work for Customer Service in [Rival Rental Car Company].”

Me: “Different company, different policies, ma’am.”

Customer: “Yeah, but your hands aren’t tied. I could say that my son just died and you’d have to give me my refund.”

I’m unable to believe what this woman just told me.

Me: “If that was the case, I’d require you to send a death certificate, ma’am.”

The customer laughs in disbelief.

Customer: “Oh, my God… What’s the number for corporate?”

I give her the number.

Customer: “Thank you, goodbye.” *Hangs up*

We Can Believe It

, , , | Right | CREDIT: accidentlyclueless | August 10, 2021

I have about three people in line, and just as I am about to serve the next person, a lady cuts in and puts her clothing items on the counter.

Lady: “Can I leave these here while I quickly go and look at some other things?”

Me: “They can’t be left on the counter, but I can put them on hold for you until you’re ready.”

Lady: “Oh, no. I want them now. I just want to quickly look at something over there, but you can start scanning them now so they’ll be ready for when I come back.”

I look at her and then look at the line of customers I have yet to serve.

Me: “No, sorry, I need to serve the customers that are already in line.”

I honestly can’t believe I had to state that out loud to a grown woman.

I’m Not A Someone

, , , , | Working | CREDIT: NinjasWCandy | August 9, 2021

I work for an Internet service provider assisting sales agents with order entry issues.

Me: “Thanks for calling ISP. This is [My Name]; how can I help?”

Representative: “Hi. I’m entering an order, but it’s not letting me waive their tech installation fee.”

Me: “What services are they ordering?”

Representative: “Only Internet.”

Me: “Ah, for the tech install to be waived, they need to purchase TV services as well as Internet. The fee, in this case, cannot be waived, so the customer will have to pay $49.99.”

Representative: “Is there someone I can talk to?”

Me: “You’re talking to someone right now.”

The representative hung up.

An Employee By Any Other Name…

, , , , | Right | CREDIT: victablook | August 9, 2021

Me: “Hello, this is [ISP]. My name is [My Name]; how may I help you?”

Customer: “Did you say your name is [My Name]?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “Hello?”

Me: “Yes, hello?”

Customer: “I’m asking you if your name is [My Name].”

Me: “Yes, it is.”

Customer: “Hello?”

Me: “Yes, that is my name.”

Customer: “See, I want to cancel my internet now. Because you people are always so rude to me. I don’t need your Internet anymore.” *Muttering to herself* “All this attitude because I asked for your name, come on…”

I had a neutral tone in my voice the entire time. I’ve had other customers ask me to repeat my name multiple times in a similar fashion and they’ve never had an issue. Calls can have audio issues, I understand that. Normally, I would try to do some retention methods, but I was just so taken aback by the response that I just cancelled her. Jeez, lady… all I did was tell you my name.

Water You Doing With Your Water?!

, , , | Right | CREDIT: butterthenugget | August 8, 2021

Caller: “Hi, I was just calling in to see why my bill went up.”

Me: “It looks like your usage increased last year. We are seeing this a lot because of everything going on at the moment. Did you start working from home?”

Caller: “No, we weren’t working; we were just sitting in the garden.”

Me: “We have here that there are two children at the property. Were they home from school?”

Caller: “Well, yeah, but they weren’t showering all the time.”

Me: “But they were home a lot more than normal.”

Caller: “Yeah, but they weren’t using water.”

I got the customer to do a leak test because, apparently, nobody in the house was allowed to use the water except for a weekly shower, according to the caller and many others I have spoken to over the last year.

Yes, water can be expensive, and it’s a pain that we have to pay for something that is so basic for our survival, but it is clean and delivered straight to our houses which is better than a lot of people get.