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I Can’t Hear You; I’ve Got Ovaries In My Ears

, , , , | Right | CREDIT: braptonmassive | October 17, 2021

I was working as a receptionist and office admin for a company in London. It was my first proper job, so I wasn’t as witty or quick with my replies as I am now. It’s coming to the end of the day and my boss — the Head of IT and Office Manager — has just left for the day and this call comes in. It’s a condescending sounding guy from an IT sales company asking to speak to my boss.

Me: “He has just left for the day.”

Caller: *A bit irritate* “Well, I know [Boss], and I could just call his mobile, so just put me through to him.”

Me: “I can’t do that. He is no longer on the premises. If you have his mobile, then feel free to call him directly. Otherwise, I’m happy to take a message and ask him to call you back tomorrow.”

Caller: *Getting pissed* “I don’t want to leave a message with a woman; you wouldn’t understand the technical wording. So, don’t you worry your pretty little head about it. Put me through to a man now!”

This is the point where I should have said, “Yeah, no. Bye,” or just hung up, but being young and having no confidence, I kind of froze, said, “Yeah,” and passed the phone to my colleague, who told the guy to sod off.

There is a happy ending, though. We told our boss the next day, and he rang the guy and essentially slaughtered him verbally down the phone while we got to listen. One of the best bosses I’ve had!

Stress Is Bad For Your Health

, , , , , , | Working | September 30, 2021

I have avoided going to the doctors for ages, way before the health crisis, but I finally made an appointment for a physical consultation as I have been told I am high-risk. I am not at all worried, but they keep sending me messages!

I am there on time but there are two people in front of me and it takes me ten minutes to speak to a receptionist.

Receptionist: “You’re ten minutes late.”

I am irked by her facial expression and tone, not to mention having to wait because a man talked to another receptionist for at least ten minutes being told repeatedly, “They probably won’t do that for you.”

Me: “Why do you think that is?”

She’s taken aback.

Receptionist: *Mumbles* “I don’t know.”

Me: “I have been standing in the queue having to listen to some bloke wasting everyone’s time.”

She didn’t know how to deal with my lateness on the computer and turned to a colleague. I could hear them say that I would have to wait for the next available time or rebook.

I didn’t want to be there in the first place, so I swanned out, telling them as much.

I am not a patient person and especially not with people who blame the service user. I will delete their texts for a few months and rebook when I feel I have gathered sufficient patience to try again. 

A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 13

, , , , , , | Working | August 27, 2021

I get a voicemail from my dentist’s office saying that I have an outstanding bill and to call them right away. This is odd because the last time I saw them, all that was done was a routine cleaning and I paid a copay at the visit. I’m not looking forward to the call since the receptionist is frequently rude.

Receptionist: “[Dentist]’s office, this is [Receptionist].”

Me: “Hi, [Receptionist], this is [My Name]. I’m returning the call I received from you about a bill.”

Receptionist: “It’s about time you called! Do you know how much you owe?!”

Me: “No, I never received a bill in the mail.”

Receptionist: “It’s $700. Get your credit card so we can take care of this.”

Me: “Wait, what?! $700 for a cleaning? Is that with insurance?”

Receptionist: *Smugly* “You didn’t have insurance. So, how are you planning on making the payment? I can take a credit card number right now.”

Me: “Yes, I do have insurance. It needs to be run again.”

Receptionist: “The insurance I have on file didn’t go through. You owe us $700.”

Me: “Is that with the old insurance or the new one I provided you with when I came in?”

Receptionist: “Uh, what?”

Me: “Was it [Old Insurance] or [New Insurance]?”

Receptionist: “It was [Old Insurance].”

Me: “That one isn’t current anymore.”

Receptionist: “Well, you didn’t give a new insurance when you were here, so now you owe us $700.”

Me: “No. I have insurance and I did give you the new insurance. I’d be more than happy to provide you the insurance information and have you run that again before making any payments.”

Receptionist: “I guess that’s the only option you’re giving me?”

Me: “Yes.”

She begrudgingly takes the information, asking for it in a very nasty tone.

Receptionist: “Fine, I did what you want. Is there anything else I can do for you?”

Me: “Yes, actually. Cancel my next appointment.”

Her attitude suddenly changes.

Receptionist: “Oh, uh, can I ask why?”

Me: “Because I never want to deal with you again.”

Sure enough, the $700 bill disappeared once sent through the correct insurance company.

A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 12
A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 11
A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 10
A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 9
A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 8

This More Painful Than Whatever You Had Done At Your Appointment

, , , | Healthy | August 26, 2021

I am on Medicaid for a short time during college. When leaving the doctor’s office, I ask if there’s anything I owe and they tell me no. A few months later, I receive a bill in the mail from the doctor’s office for $3, along with instructions on how to pay it online. When I go online, the site tells me it won’t accept payments under $10, so I call their office.

Me: “I received a $3 bill from your office but it won’t accept the payment online since it’s under $10. Can I pay over the phone?”

Receptionist: “No, we don’t accept payments under $10 over the phone, either.”

Me: “Can I mail you the money, then, or drop it off during off-hours? My work schedule doesn’t work with your hours of operation.”

Receptionist: “No, it has to be in person.”

Me: “You’re only open from 9:00 am to 5:00 pm. I work from 8:00 am to 5:00 pm and only have a thirty-minute break. My workplace is a thirty-minute drive from your office. Are you really giving me no other option than asking for time off to drive an hours’ worth to pay $3?”

Receptionist: *Long pause* “I’ll waive the fee.”

I’ve Always Been A Morning Person, A Morning Girrrrrrl, HOORAY!

, , , , , , | Working | August 25, 2021

I tell every boss I’ve ever had that I am not a morning person. No one ever believes me as I seem upbeat and chipper in the mornings, usually due to tons of caffeine and my “work persona.” There’s also a huge disconnect with my brain in the morning because I sleep like I’m dead. I usually don’t answer my phone in the morning cause I don’t hear it

I somehow answer the phone when it rings early one morning on my day off.

Me: “’Ello?”

Receptionist: “Hey, [My Name], I know it’s your day off, but you have a client in here to talk to you.”

Me: “What?”

Receptionist: “You have a client in here. Do you want to come in?”

Me: “I don’t… Why?”

Receptionist: “Oh, hang on. Here’s your boss. He needs to talk to you.”

Me: “Uhh…”

Boss: “Hey, [My Name], I know it’s early and your day off, but one of your clients showed up. Would you be able to come in and help them out? If not, I can flip it to one of the other client advisors.”

Me: “Wait, who is this?”

I start to actually wake up.

Boss: “This is [Boss]. Do you want to come in?”

Me: “Why would I come in?”

Boss: “Because your client is here?”

Me: “Oh… Yeah, no, I just woke up.”

Boss: “I can tell. I’ll get someone to help them.”

Me: “Awesome, bye.”

I remembered literally the very last part of this conversation and ended up calling my boss after I actually woke up. He was laughing so hard at how I was and how I couldn’t remember anything that had happened. It was used as an illustration that I needed to have coffee or an adequate amount of time before having a conversation.