Unfiltered Story #108944

, | Unfiltered | April 15, 2018

This story takes place at 5.25 in the morning. My ticket window is open and my colleague is just about to start, he hasn’t got his microphone on yet so customers cannot hear him. A customer comes up to my window.

Customer: How much is it for a single to Chippenham?

Me: (After looking the fare up) £20

Customer: That’s a bit steep, where am I?

Me: Reading.

Customer: Where’s that?

Me: (Starting to think it’s going to be one of “those” mornings) Berkshire.

Customer: B***** Hell. I only popped out for a pint of milk.

Coworker: (Socco Voce) I think you’ve popped out for something a bit stronger.

After this it all goes downhill from there, after suggesting he grabs a cup of coffee while he thinks things over, he comes back at 7.30 to buy a ticket.  He then comes back at 11.30 saying that he has a ticket for collection and was eventually escorted off the station premises at 13.45 in the company of 2 very large and very annoyed transport police officers.

That Remark Is Going To Go Down A Storm

, , , , | Right | March 28, 2018

(I am a greeter at a very large car wash, and we are about to close early because it’s been pouring down rain all day. A customer approaches.)

Me: “Hi there, sir. How are you today?”

Customer: “Are you guys still open?”

Me: “Yes, but we will likely be closing soon because of the storm.”

Customer: “I don’t even know why you guys opened up today! Who in their right mind would get their car washed on a day like this?”

(The customer then proceeded to purchase an exterior car wash.)

Who Prescribed Some Madness?

, , , | Healthy | January 4, 2018

(We have a new member of staff at the pharmacy and we’ve got a number of regulars who come in to get their weekly medications, often quite a few items. This employee somehow gets it into her head that anyone with a weekly prescription is a drug abuser. One of our regulars is on a lot of different pain medications.)

Regular: “Good morning! I’m here to pick up my prescriptions. My name is [Regular].”

(The new staff member goes out to the back of the store and comes back out a few minutes later.)

New Staff: “No, there isn’t anything.”

Regular: “I pick this up every week, and I know I have at least three months’ worth of repeats for all these from the doctor.”

New Staff: “No. No, we have nothing.”

Regular: *spotting our pharmacist who knows her very well* “Hi, [Pharmacist]! Got my weekly meds?”

Pharmacist: “Oh, yeah. I did them yesterday—”

New Staff: “No! No, you didn’t. We have nothing!” *to Regular* “You need to leave; we have nothing for you!”

Pharmacist: “Don’t be daft. I’ll go fetch them.” *heads to the back and comes out with a large bag* “Can I just check your address and date of birth?”

Regular: *gives details*

Pharmacist: “Yup, here you go. See you next week!”

New Staff: “I told her we had nothing! Why did you make me look like a liar?!”

Pharmacist: “Because you were lying? [Regular] comes in every week and I always have her meds done.”

New Staff: “I saw what she’s on. She’s a f****** druggie. You shouldn’t enable these people.”

Regular: “I beg your pardon?”

Pharmacist: “Okay, we do not treat customers like that. Whatever personal views you have on certain medications, you leave those views at home.”

New Staff: “She’s a druggie. Why would anyone else need [strong pain medication]?”

Regular: “Because half my lower spine was smashed in an accident and I live in constant, agonising pain?”

New Staff: “Shut up, druggie.”

Pharmacist: “Right. That’s it. Go home.”

(She was fired that day, and officially cautioned by the police when for two weeks afterward she kept hanging around the pharmacy entrance waiting for our regular customer so she could yell at them some more. We know this because she told EVERY other customer entering our store. Luckily, our regular has a good sense of humour and just laughed off the whole episode.)

Bait And Switching Stores

, , , , | Working | November 5, 2017

Me: “I need a new, cheap desktop.”

Floorwalker: “This one’s a good one. £320—” *goes on about the technical specs*

Me: “Yes, that will suit me fine.”

Floorwalker: “Oh, dear! We’re out of stock. You’ll have to have this one instead; it’s £340, and nearly as good as that one.”

Me: “The classic bait-and-switch, eh?”

Floorwalker: “No, it’s not like that! Seriously, we’ve run out of the other one.”

Me: “Well, I suppose I might as well… Okay, let’s go for it.”

Floorwalker: “Ah, er, we’re out of that one, too.”

Me: “Um, you do actually have some computers, don’t you?”

Floorwalker: “Er… No. Not many. Our deliveries come in tomorrow. If you come in tomorrow, you can have one then.”

Me: “Nope, I need one now. Suppose I’ll have to go to [Rival Store].”

(I did, and got one for £230, of a higher spec than the one I was offered at the first place.)

Not Into Darcy’s

, , , , , , | Related | October 24, 2017

(I’m female, and in my early 20s I am feeling out my nascent lesbianism. My family is pretty cool, but I am still quite nervous about coming out, especially as I’m not sure if I am gay, bi, confused, or going through a phase. One night, I go to the cinema with my dad to see the first Bridget Jones movie. At the end, he turns to me and, clearly trying to use young-person language, says:)

Dad: “So, Colin Firth? Is he… fit, then?”

Me: *caught off guard* “Ermmmmmm. Um… Ah. Um… Well, Dad, I’m not so much into boys at the minute.”

Dad: *without missing a beat* “So, Renée Zellweger. Is she fit, then?”

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