Blinky Box Bother

, , , , | Right | December 5, 2018

(I work in the service department of a large electronics store. We work on consumer electronics. While we traditionally do not do phone support, we do take phone calls, and we usually try to find out if the issue is with their computer — which we can work on if they bring it to us — or something else like their network, in which case they would need to contact their ISP. I have quickly realized the issue is with the caller’s modem and/or router, not with the computer.)

Me: “Sir, from what you are describing, this issue isn’t the computer. I would recommend calling your ISP.”

Caller: “My what?”

Me: “Your Internet provider, the people you pay for Internet access.”

Caller: “How dare you?! I have a bachelor’s degree from [Local University]; I graduated with honors! You have the gall to want to dumb down your speech to me?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, most people aren’t technically-minded, so we have to use a lot of analogies and break things down.”

Caller: “Well, that is not an excuse. Now, I need my… my…” *almost whiny sounding* “…my blinky box isn’t blinky anymore and I need it working!”

Me: “Um… We don’t work on blinky boxes, only computers. Please call your Internet access provider. Thank you and goodbye.”

(I hung up the phone and immediately burst out laughing.)

“Two Minutes” Now Means “Forever”

, , , , | Right | November 24, 2018

(I am 19. It is my last day working at a sandwich shop. I have just called an order up and am packing the next one. My friend’s mom comes up to collect her order, so I make small talk while packing the next when a blonde female customer comes up.)

Customer: “Excuse me? I have thirty minutes for lunch. I don’t have time for this.”

Me: “Ma’am, you are order [number]. I’m packing it right now; don’t worry.”

Customer: “I’ve been waiting forever for my lunch; they really shouldn’t hire kids to do this job.”

(She continues on about how the wait time has been unacceptable — keeping in mind that it is the lunch rush. I think it matters that I am not talking to a friend, but rather being respectful by not ignoring my friend’s mom.)

Me: “Ma’am, I have your order right here. We’ve just hit the two-minute mark, and our goal is to get it out to you in less than three.”

(I turn to my friend’s mom as I place the bag on the counter.)

Me: “And people like her are the reason this is my last day.”

Unfiltered Story #124619

, , , | Unfiltered | October 31, 2018

(I was working with a friend who had a table at a local HUGE farmers market. I’m an early 20s female, but i was decked out in a t-shirt and an old, dirty pair of overalls. Mostly I was giving advice on planting and helping customers with their purchases. Right in front of our table a pair of exhausted looking young parents and thier SCREAMING two year old in tow. She keeps tugging away from them and running off into the crowd. Filthy farmer girl that I was, I go up to them and ask…)

Me: “Mind if I take her off your hands? *wink* I could use an extra pair of hands mucking stables.”
Father: “Sure! She’s all yours.”
Mother: *nods*
Me: I pick up the child and start walking away from the parents slowly. (They can still fully see me, but the child cant see them.) After a few yards she starts shrieking and reaching towards where she last saw her parents. I put her down and watch her race back to them and hold both of their hands tightly. No longer fussing about anything.
Both parents mouth “thank you”
I give them a nod and they continue shopping, in peace.

Don’t Give Them Credit For Trying

, , , , | Working | September 29, 2018

(I get a phone call from an 800-number I don’t recognize. Every now and then, these are legitimate calls, so I answer.)

Recording: “Hello, this call is in regards to the interest rate on your Visa or Mastercard credit card account. To speak to a representative, please stay on the line.”

(As I only have one credit card, which is a secured card through a company that always identifies themselves on the phone, I know that this is a scam. I’ve got time, so I figure it’ll be fun to mess with the scammer, and I stay on the line.)

Scammer: “Hi, this is a call in regards to your Visa or Mastercard credit card. May I have your name, please?”

Me: “Sure, but first, what credit card company are you calling from?”

Scammer: *pause* “This is about your Visa or Mastercard credit card.”

Me: “Right, I gathered that. But which [Company] is the credit card through? Visa and Mastercard are typically issued by another company. So, which company is this?”

(He hung up on me. Rude.)

Too Chicken To Add Shrimp

, , , , , , | Right | July 31, 2018

(I am standing in line waiting to pay for a to-go order when I overhear the following:)

Customer: “I want the chicken broccoli with extra shrimp.”

Cashier: “So, you want chicken broccoli, and you want to add shrimp?”

Customer: “No, I want extra shrimp.”

Cashier: “Chicken broccoli comes with chicken; did you want shrimp broccoli?”

Customer: “No, I want chicken broccoli with extra shrimp.”

Cashier: “So, two extra add shrimps?”

Customer: “No, I don’t want to add shrimp; I want extra shrimp.”

(I see the cashier die a little inside as she realizes she won’t be able to make this person understand.)

Cashier: “It’s an extra dollar.”

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