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Free Prizes Are Not Their Calling

| USA | Bad Behavior, Popular

(I work the midday shift at a radio station, and we’re doing a “call to win” contest.)

Me: “Hello, [Station]!”

Caller: “What caller am I?”

Me: “You’re number two.”

Caller: “What caller wins?”

Me: “Number seven.”

Caller: “You giving away anything good?”

(I tell them the prize.)

Caller: “Well, f*** that! Who wants that?”

Me: “Someone who doesn’t gripe when getting something for free.”

When Larry Met Crazy

| Mt. Vernon, IL, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests

(I am working in the afternoon as a board operator at a local country music station. At the top of every hour they play a five-minute feed from CNN news.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Station Name]. How may i help you today?”

Caller: “I DEMAND TO SPEAK TO LARRY KING!”

Me: “Okay, sir, I’m afraid I cannot do that. We are a—”

Caller: “I KNOW D***-WELL WHAT YOU ARE! LET ME SPEAK TO LARRY KING!”

Me: “I understand, but Larry King doesn’t work here. We only air CNN news, which comes in via an automated service.”

Caller: “YEAH! CNN! THAT’S YOU GUYS! CNN! LARRY KING IS ON CNN! LET ME TALK TO LARRY NOW!”

Me: “Sir, I’m afraid I cannot do that. He is not here in our studio. We are not CNN.”

Caller: “YOUR MANAGER, NOW! YOU’RE FIRED!”

Me: “Okay, please hold.”

(I transfer him to my manager. 10 minutes later…)

Manager: “I just dealt with the most angry man who thinks Larry King works here.”

Me: “I tried to explain to him that we only play CNN news on the top of the hour and that we are not CNN news.”

Manager: “Yeah, I told him the same.”

Me: “So how did you get rid of him?”

Manager: “I told him that Larry King traces all his calls before taking them and he hung up really quickly after that.”

Not As Quick As Lightning

| LA, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(I work at an AM radio station, and we have just suffered a lightning hit at the tower which knocked us off the air. Then the phone rings:)

Listener: “Hey, I don’t hear anything on my radio!”

Me: “Yeah, we got knocked off by lightning.”

Listener: “Well, why don’t you make an announcement?”

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