Finally Doing The Thing

, , , , | Romantic | March 30, 2018

(I’ve been dating a guy for a while, things have been going pretty well, and he finally proposes!)

Boyfriend: “I was thinking about us getting married. What do you think?”

Me: “Swiggity swing! You get the ring, and we’ll do the thing!”

(We’re getting married in three months.)

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The Cake Is A Lie, But With A Really Good Excuse

, , , , , , | Romantic | March 5, 2018

(I am female in my late 20s. This has been the worse fortnight of my life so far; I was made redundant at work, I fell out with a very close friend over something really stupid, and someone rear-ended me. My period has also started, making everything a lot worse, as I get extremely hormonal during this time. Now, my glasses have broken. I emotionally break down, and cry at my boyfriend.)

Me: *whilst sobbing* “I have no friends, no vision, no car, and no money to sort out two of those problems! AND I’M BLEEDING EVERYWHERE!”

Boyfriend: “Shall I go get some cake?”

Me: *stops wailing, but still sniffing* “Cake?”

Boyfriend: “Yeah, let’s go to [My Favourite Cake Place].”

Me: *sniffing* “Really?”

Boyfriend: “Really, really.”

(He goes on the cake trip. He comes back sooner than I’d expect, and hands me the bag, which is too light to have cake in it. I open it up and find a ring box with a ring in it.)

Boyfriend: “Will yo—”

Me: *truly distressed* “Where’s the cake?!”

Boyfriend: “I… Erm.”

Me: “You said there would be cake!”

Boyfriend: “Okay… You’re irrationally—”

Me: *irrationally upset* “I am not irrationally upset! You promised cake! Instead, I get a ring that I can’t even see properly, because I have no vision! How could you betray me like this?!” *ugly, hysterical sobbing*

(He did go get me cake. And I did apologise to him over being overly emotional and dramatic. Surprisingly, he still wanted to marry me after that, so I said yes.)

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Here We Pokémon Go Again, Part 39

, , | Romantic | May 23, 2017

(I’ve only been dating my boyfriend for a year, but we are very close and tentatively planning our future together. We also love playing Pokémon Go. While out on a walk, he hatches an egg. This means he gets a completely random Pokémon.)

Boyfriend: “Hey, if this is a Charmander, will you marry me?”

Me: *amused* “This is how it’s gonna be huh? All right, go ahead.”

(Egg hatches, and out pops a Charmander! I crack up laughing while my boyfriend has a stunned, but happy look in his face.)

Me: “So, when’s the wedding?”

(We are not quite there yet, but after a 1 in 100 chance, at least Nintendo approves of us!)

 

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A Fortunate Proposal

, , , , | Romantic | March 21, 2017

(My boyfriend and I are having dinner with his siblings and some other friends. We’re having Chinese takeout, and afterwards there are fortune cookies. My boyfriend passes them out.)

Brother #1: “Mine says ‘Your future will be happy and productive.’ I hope so!”

Me: “Mine is ‘Believe in yourself, and others will, too.’ I like that.”

Boyfriend: “Wait, what? Let me see yours.”

(He takes my fortune and reads it, then looks in the takeout bag, looking confused.)

Brother #2: “Guys, my fortune says ‘Will you marry me?’ What?”

Boyfriend: “Oh, f***!”

(He leans across the table, snatches the fortune out of [Brother #2’s] hands and gives it to me.)

Boyfriend: “Well, no one can say I didn’t try.”

(I said yes.)

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The Wedding Before The Nightmare Before Christmas

, , , | Romantic | October 31, 2016

(My boyfriend is playing an online game with some of his friends and I’m on my computer browsing Pinterest. I catch part of their conversation: apparently, they’ve started talking about their girlfriends. Neither of us are particularly romantic.)

Boyfriend: *to his friends* “Yeah, my girlfriend is awesome. She loves to cook, helps me keep the house clean, and she crochets some really awesome stuff. She’s actually looking for crochet patterns right now.”

(He listens to his friends for a moment then laughs.)

Boyfriend: “No, dude, you don’t understand: she doesn’t just make hats and gloves like your grandma. I mean, yeah, she made me an awesome R2-D2 hat but she also made me the Enterprise.” *pause* “Yeah, THAT Enterprise. It’s sitting on a shelf in our living room.” *pause* “She’s definitely a keeper. In fact, hey, [Best Friend], would you be my best man?”

(I turn to give him an incredulous look but can’t help laughing.)

Me: “Really?”

Boyfriend: *pulls off his headset and turns to face me* “So, how about we get married on Halloween next year? That’s your favorite holiday, isn’t it? I figure we could do The Nightmare Before Christmas for the theme since it’s your favorite thing ever.”

Me: *laughing* “Sure, let’s do it. Let’s get married on Halloween. I’ll make a Pinterest board for it and start saving ideas.”

(He claps once then turns back to his game and puts his headset back on.)

Boyfriend: “Okay, so, save the date, [Best Friend]. We’re getting married on October 31, 2016 and you’re going to be my best man.” *pause* “Yes, she agreed.” *pause* “No, she wasn’t mad. You guys just don’t understand her like I do.”

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