It’s Not The Postman Going Postal Today

, , , , , | Working | June 15, 2018

(A fellow I used to know had a bit of a feud going on with some members of his family at one point. What they were doing was repeatedly going to the post office and redirecting his mail, which, of course, was illegal. When he went to the post office to fix it, they wouldn’t do anything to fix the problem and even allowed it to happen again. He was at his wits’ end, so I coached him on how to fix the problem with the post office. First, I coached him on the importance of only doing it when there were a lot of people in there — an audience if you will. Here is the process I gave him.)

Postal Worker: “Good morning, sir. How may I help you?”

Friend: “Good morning.” *drops phone book on counter and open to a random page* “This person, here: I want their mail redirected to—” *flips phone book to another random page* “—this address, here.” *flips to another page* “And this person, here—” *again flipping page* “I want it sent here.”

Postal Worker: *aghast* “SIR! I can’t allow you to redirect other people’s mail! It isn’t legal!”

Friend: *loudly* “Why not? You’ve let other people do it to me four times in the last month. I should be able to screw other people over, too!”

(Other people waiting in line started to murmur. The upshot was that the station master was called to the front, and his mail was set up requiring picture ID to be presented before his mail could be redirected, thereby ending the problem.)

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That’s How I Roll

, , , , | Related | April 5, 2018

(I am standing in a rather long line, waiting to mail a package, when I notice a guy wrapping a rather large box in packing tape. It looks like he has already used half a roll, and he doesn’t seem to be slowing down.)

Me: “I think it’s secure.”

Man: “Yeah, but this box is going to Germany to my in-laws, and they hate wasting things. This is my little ‘f*** you’ to make them mad.”

(He used the entire roll.)

The Mother Can Just Go And Suck It!

, , , , , , , , | Right | February 28, 2018

(I am standing in line at the post office waiting to send out a package. There are a few people in line, but only one person at the counter. By the main entrance, there is a spinning display full of gift cards. Next to it is a counter where a young-ish mother stands with her maybe four-year-old daughter. The daughter is having fun tearing down gift cards from the rack and leaving them near the entrance. Anyone not paying attention could easily slip and fall on the cards. The mother is downright ignoring her daughter doing this, filling out some kind of form. The clerk is clearly getting flustered with this.)

Me: “Excuse me, ma’am. Could you please get those gift cards off of the floor?”

Mother: *snippy* “I’ll do it when I’m done.”

Me: “You understand that if someone comes through that door they’re going to slip on the cards, right?”

Mother: “It’s not my fault if people are clumsy.”

Me: “No, but it is your fault that you’re ignoring your daughter tearing up the display.”

Mother: “Whatever.”

(The mother goes back to filling out her form. I get fed up at this point. I walk up to the daughter, ignoring the mother. I kneel down to talk to her.)

Me: “Sweetie, what’s your name?”

Girl: “[Girl].”

Me: “Okay, [Girl], I have a game for you. Can you match the pictures and numbers on these cards?”

Girl: “YES! I’m smart. I know all my ABCs and 123s!”

Mother: “[Girl]! Don’t talk to strangers! You, quit talking to my kid!”

Me: “Okay, sweetie, here’s the game. If we don’t get all these cards up and back in their proper place, the nice postman is going to get in trouble. So, if you can get these cards back in place in the next five minutes, I’ll buy you a tasty sucker from the counter. Can you do it? Show me how smart you are!”

Mother: “Don’t you be offering my child candy! I’ll call the cops.”

Girl: *excitedly* “I can do it! I can do it!”

(The girl starts picking up her mess and putting the gift cards back where they belong. She does a pretty good job of it, too. Meanwhile, the mother is trying to stop her.)

Mother: “[Girl], stop that! It’s not your job!”

Girl: “Mommy, I want the sucker! The man promised!”

(Sure enough, she gets them all up pretty quick, and mostly accurately. I buy her two suckers while shipping my package, and the postal clerk quietly thanks me. I walk over to the mother.)

Me: *to the mother* “Since I don’t know what you’re feeding her, here.” *I pitch the two suckers in her handbag, then I turn to the girl* “You did a very good job, sweetheart. I got you two suckers for being so quick. Next time, though, don’t pull down stuff like that, okay?”

Girl: “Okay! Thank you, mister!”

They Will Fix It In Post

, , , | Working | February 15, 2018

(A friend and I sell items in an online store. Someone makes a purchase, so we pack up the item and purchase and print a shipping label through the website, which also sends a notification to the customer. Then, we drop the package off at the post office. Several days later, I get a message from the customer asking if the order has shipped yet. I check the tracking info only to see that, for some reason, that package has neither shipped nor even been checked in to the post office. My friend confirms she definitely dropped it off. We try calling the post office, but apparently, this branch is notoriously bad at ever answering the phones. Instead, my friend resolves to go to the post office in person and find out what’s going on. When she arrives and inquires about the package, it is quickly found on the floor in a corner, the label never having been scanned in. As my friend is making the employee scan the package into the system in front of her eyes, this interaction happens:)

Post Office Worker: “In the future, you should just hand packages directly to workers, rather than dropping them in the dropbox.”

Friend: “Seriously?!”

Post Office Worker: “What?”

Friend: “I did! You are the one I handed it to!”

(The customer finally got their package, and we don’t use that post office anymore.)

Unfiltered Story #103849

, , , | Unfiltered | January 19, 2018

(I am in line behind one man at the post office to use one of their self-service mailing machines, and the woman using it is taking a while to get her package mailed.)

Woman: Turns to those of us in line and says, “Sorry I’m taking so long, this is the first time I’ve used this machine.”

Man in Front of Me: Seems to be annoyed with the lady, makes a gesture with his hands and says, “Yes, hurry it along.”

Me: “Excuse me sir, there’s no need to be rude. She apologized. I’m sure all of us in line have places to be as well, but you don’t see us berating someone for taking a little bit more time to use a machine she’s unfamiliar with.”

The man in questions shut up for the entire time he was in line, and the woman even stuck around after he left to thank me for sticking up for her and calling the man out on his rudeness.

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