Not Thinking Inside The Mailbox

, , , , , | Working | September 27, 2017

(I am standing in line at my local post office when I overhear this:)

Man: “There’s been a problem; I’ve put my mail on hold, but it’s still being delivered.”

Worker: *interrupting him* “Yes, your mail was delivered to your mailbox.”

Man: “My mail was put on hold because I don’t have a mailbox right now.”

Worker: “Well, you should have been issued a temporary city-given one.”

(In our city, if a mailbox is damaged, it will be replaced by the city.)

Man: “No, I don’t have a mailbox, temporary or not. And now I’m looking for a week’s’ worth of mail.”

Worker: “The mail was delivered to your mailbox!”

Man: “The mail that should have been on hold was delivered to the mailbox I don’t have.”

Worker: “I’m sure the delivery person was just trying to be nice!”

Man: “By delivering my held mail to a mailbox that’s not mine?”

(Throughout this entire conversation, the post office worker continued to walk in circles about the mail, which should have been held, being delivered to either a mailbox that didn’t exist or to the wrong one. No apologies were given, either, and no ETA was given on the missing mail.)

Needs A Stamp Of Reality

, , , | Right | September 26, 2017

(I’m waiting in line behind an older customer who seems disturbed about something. The nicest clerk calls her up. The customer is complaining that the only books of stamps they have are Christmas themed.)

Customer: “I went to the other post office, and all they had was Christmas stamps. I thought your office would be more updated.”

Clerk: “Sorry, but I don’t have any control over what stamps we carry.”

(She grumbles off and the clerk calls me up.)

Me: “I’ll take Christmas stamps…”

Clerk: “Yeah, my son was in the Peace Corps in Kazakhstan for three years. To reach the post office, it took three buses. And when they had to wait for a bus, they had to stand back-to-back to watch out for the wolves.”

Me: “Holy cats.”

Clerk: “Yeah, so, when people like that come in… I just don’t get it.”

Gay-itis

, , , , | Right | September 4, 2017

(I’ve just sold a pack of novelty stamps to an elderly woman.)

Woman: “Is it safe to lick these?”

Me: “You don’t need to; they’re adhesive on the back. You just need to peel it off and stick it straight on.”

Woman: “That’s good. I didn’t want to catch the gay.”

Me: “Gay?”

Woman: “From the rainbow. Everyone knows if you lick something that has a rainbow on it, you catch the gay. That’s why I stay inside when those gay floats come down my street. You don’t want anything accidentally landing in your mouth.” *leaves*

Coworker: “I wonder if she’s ever had a bag of Skittles.”

Me: “I doubt it. You definitely catch the gay from them!”

Stamping It Out Before It Starts

| Boulder, CO, USA | Right | July 19, 2017

Clerk: *weighing parcel* “Okay, you’ll need one more stamp.”

Customer: “One more?”

Clerk: “Yes, one more.”

Customer: “A whole stamp?”

Clerk: “Yes…”

Customer: “I need one more whole stamp?”

Clerk: “Well, it’s 0.7 oz over. So that will take a whole stamp, yes.”

Customer: “But it needs to be a whole stamp?”

(Eventually they sold her a stamp and she left. When I laughed and commented the clerk said some people will just tape the coins to the package!)

A Catalog Of Errors

| Moraga, CA, USA | Working | May 24, 2017

(My dad does maintenance at post offices over several counties (painting, electrical, machinery, etc). Dad would get a work order requesting a fix; he would drive over, check to see what needed to be done, go to a local hardware store, buy the part, and fix it right away. That’s how he USED to do it…)

Boss: *at meeting* “There are going to be some changes in how we handle work orders from now on. All purchased parts have to come out of a catalog from [Company the post office made a contract with]. We will no longer authorize employees to purchase parts from stores.”

Dad: “So, let me get this straight… You want me to drive to [City 50 miles away], look at the problem, drive 50 miles back here, order a part, wait a week for the part to arrive, drive back to the scene, fix it, then drive back here.”

Boss: “That’s right!”

Dad: “That’s going to be more expensive in the long run.”

Boss: “Not at all. We get a discount from the company.”

Dad: “This part right here costs $12 with our discount. I can buy it for $8 at [Hardware Store]. How does driving 200 miles on two round trips save us any money?”

Boss: “This is how you will do it from now on. I don’t want to hear any more about it.”

Dad: “Okay…”

(And until the day he retired, Dad had to listen to upper management freak out about how the costs skyrocketed and discussing frantically where they could possibly cut costs. Every time Dad told them to just let him buy from a hardware store, he was told that their discount was what was saving them money.)

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