Unfiltered Story #137112

, , , | Unfiltered | January 22, 2019

(I work in a retail store with some confusing signage. Most customers who ask about prices understand once you explain that they need to check the tag instead of assuming the price matches the sign. One customer I am checking out at the register did not understand.)
Me: Okay, you’re total is $19.95 today.
Customer: You overcharged me.
Me: The tag says $19.95, and that is what my computer is telling me.
Customer: Well the sign said $9.95.
Me: Oh, unfortunately the sign was referencing the $9.95 crop tops. This shirt is $19.95.
Customer: But the sign said $9.95.
Me: Actually it says ‘select items starting at’ and this particular item is not that price.
(The customer continues to argue with me until we go to the actual sign and I show them where it says ‘select items starting at)
Customer: Well that’s false advertising! I want to see a manager.

A New Year’s Resolution Guaranteed For Success

, , , , , | Right | January 1, 2019

(I’m the customer, arriving at my gym on New Year’s to cancel my membership because of scheduling issues. The employee is at the front desk helping a woman.)

Employee: “Welcome! Are you here for a tour?”

Me: “Uh, no… We’re here to cancel our membership.”

Woman: *looks shocked and bursts out laughing*

Employee: “Oh… uh…”

Me: “Our New Year resolution is to stop working out.”

A Dimple Explanation

, , , , , , | Related | December 30, 2018

(My husband and I recently had our first child. My parents are in town to help. It’s worth noting that both hubby and I have dimples when we smile.)

Mother: *looking at my son* “He is so adorable. Look at these dimples. He got them from his dad. Such a beautiful boy.”

Me: “Are you sure that he got them from his dad and not mom?”

(The mother continues cooing over the baby. Two days later, my mother is looking at our photos above the fireplace.)

Mother: “Oh, you have dimples, too. Is it something new?”

Me: “Mother, I’ve had dimples my entire life. How did you manage to not notice them?”

Mother: “So, [Child] could have gotten the dimples from you? I thought that it was all his dad’s side… Are you sure that you’ve always had dimples?”

There’s Really Only One Place It Could Be…

, , , , , | Healthy | December 14, 2018

(I am in labor at the hospital. My midwife comes in to check how it is going and to feel the baby’s position for delivery. After feeling my belly she says:)

Midwife: “I cannot find the baby.”

Me: “Well, I am pretty sure that he didn’t come out yet, so he must be somewhere inside.”

Unfiltered Story #129055

, , , | Unfiltered | December 2, 2018

Me: “Thank you for calling Tech Support. My name is [My Name], how can I help you?”

Customer: “Your phone gave me PTSD.”

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