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Sadly, Their Brain Is Just Syrup

, , , , , , | Right | April 27, 2022

I’m a barista at an independent café. A customer that I recognize comes in; she always orders the same drink.

Me: “Hello! Are you getting your blended mocha with soy milk?”

Customer: “Yes, and this time, I’d like to try it with peppermint syrup, as well.”

Me: “Sure thing! That will be $5.25.”

Customer: “What? My drink is always $4.75!”

Me: “Yes, but this time you are adding an additional flavor, which costs $0.50 extra.”

Customer: “But I always get the same drink!”

Me: “Yes, your usual blended mocha with soy milk is $4.75, but you ordered it with peppermint, which is a $0.50 upcharge, for a total of $5.25.”

She paid with a huff and sat down to wait, occasionally looking up to glare at me. She began to type furiously on her phone.

Sure enough, when I checked our reviews after my shift, she had given us two stars. Her review said, “Their coffee is great! It is frustrating when you come in and get the same drink often but the prices change every time you come in. Makes me not want to come in anymore knowing I could pay more or less depending on how they ring it up that day.”


Living In Their Own Little Bubbles

, , , , | Right | April 14, 2022

I’m working as a barista. My coworker spots a woman outside who is making her way over to our doors. Before she comes in, my coworker whispers to me that this particular customer often complains about her drinks.

Me: “Welcome to [Coffee Shop]! What can I get started for you?”

Customer: “I’ll have a medium latte with extra foam.”

After ringing her up, I begin to make her coffee. The milk steams up beautifully and makes a nice layer of foam on her latte. I’m pleased with how well the drink came out. I hand the woman her order and go back to my station. I glance over at her and notice that she is staring at her drink without taking a sip.

Me: “Ma’am, is everything okay with your latte?”

Customer: “Well… it’s just that when [Owner] makes my latte, there are usually more bubbles in the foam.”

Me: “I’m sorry, would you like me to remake it for you? I can make your latte with even more foam if you would like!”

Customer: “No, the foam is fine, but when [Owner] makes it there are more bubbles.”

Me: “Are you sure you don’t want your drink remade? [Owner] isn’t here today, but [Coworker] or I can happily make the latte to your liking.”

Customer: “No, no…” *Sadly takes a sip of her latte*

Unsure of what to do, I tell her that if she changes her mind to please let us know. She eventually finishes her drink and starts to leave.

Me: “Have a good day!”

Customer: *Sighs* “It’s just that [Owner] always makes it with more bubbles…”

Why complain if you won’t let us try to fix it for you? Later, when I spoke to [Owner] about her, he said she always picks something arbitrary to complain about!

This Toddler Is A Whole Mood

, , , , , , | Working | December 3, 2021

I am working at home while trying to manage my young children during the health crisis. I hear the doorbell ring and look through the peephole to see a salesman who has ignored the “No Soliciting” sign as well as our local Stay At Home orders. He sees movement and begins to knock as well as ring the doorbell. I sigh and begin to look for a mask when my three-year-old, already masked, opens the door by himself.

Three-Year-Old: “Are you Amazon?”

Salesman: “No.”

My three-year-old slammed the door, and the salesman walked away!

Leading By Example

, , , , , | Right | May 7, 2021

We’re about to close. I’m running customer service, and my coworker running our self-serve checkout comes up to me with a box of shoes and the customer saying she needs help with a price adjustment that seems fishy. He wants a pair of shoes that are on sale for $25 for $5.

Customer: “Well, there’s a tag that says five dollars.”

Me: “We have sample price tags that show what our clearance stickers look like. They say ‘Example’ over them to make it less confusing.”

Customer: “No, it said it was $5.”

Me: “You know what, if you want to take a picture of it and show it to me, I’ll see what I can do.”

He runs off to get the picture, and I work on closing the customer service desk. When he comes back, he shows me the picture. Sure enough, it is an example price that has “Example” pasted over the image, above, and below it.

Me: “Sir, that’s an example tag. The shoes are $25.”

Customer: “You’re not going to honor the price?”

Me: *Laughing and trying not to cry* “No, it’s not a real price, sir.”

Customer: “You sure?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “It’s not. A real. Price. I’m not giving you shoes for a fake sale price. Do you want the shoes?”

Customer: “Sure.”

He dropped $30 and pays easily as if we hadn’t just spent minutes arguing over a sample clearance tag. It looked like there was nothing going on in his head. I’m surprised we came to an agreement. That concluded a very long day.

Two No’s, One For Each One

, , , , , | Right | March 6, 2021

Customer: “Can I get a pack of [cigarettes]?”

Me: “Do you have ID I can look at?”

Customer: “I have a photocopy of it.”

Me: “No, sorry, I need the actual ID.”

Customer: “Or I can show you my tits.”

Me: *Shocked* “No.”

Customer: “What about your manager?”

My manager turns around with a WTF look on his face.

Manager: “No.”