Unfiltered Story #154733

, , , | | Unfiltered | June 12, 2019

I’m volunteering at the pool (recording swim test scores, tidying up gear, fixing lane lines), and I happen to be wearing a red bathing suit. A mom waiting to pick up her kid starts talking to me:

Mom: Lifeguard red! Is it fun being a lifeguard here?

I try to explain to her that I am a volunteer and not a qualified lifeguard. She is having none of it. She continues to try to make conversation about my status as a lifeguard.

Me: I am just a volunteer! I’m not even legally an adult, so I can’t be a lifeguard.

Mom: …oh. Are you a junior lifeguard?

Me: NO! No. I’m not. I’m not really into that kind of thing. I’m just working at the pool for the morning.

Mom: Well, you should really sign up for Junior Lifeguards.

Helicopter Moms Can Be Very Testing

, , , , | | Right | May 18, 2019

(I’m a lifeguard at a community center pool. At the time of this story, our company is running a promotion that gives free short-term memberships. A child, around 11 or 12, goes to go down the slide. She is missing the required wristband, so I tell her she needs to take a swim test. She nods, leaves, and returns with her irate mother.)

Mother: “Why does my child need to take a swim test?”

Me: “It’s company policy.”

Mother: “[Front Desk] said we could try everything.”

Me: *after stifling a sigh of frustration with [Front Desk]* “She still needs to take the test for her safety.”

Mother: “Fine! Give her the test!”

(I begin telling the child what is required for the swim test. After a few seconds, the mother interrupts.)

Mother: “You’re talking too fast.”

Me: “Okay, I’ll repeat myself slower.”

Mother: “No, we’re leaving.”

(The mother and child left and made a complaint to the front desk saying that I was very rude to them. The manager laughed it off.)

We Hope The Dog Had A Good Time At Least

, , , , | | Right | May 3, 2019

(I work at a swimming pool.)

Woman: “Can I leave my dog here?”

Me: “I’m afraid not, madam.”

Woman: “Why ever not? This is terrible service. I demand you tell me exactly why I cannot leave my dog here!”

Me: “This is a swimming pool.”

Woman: *after a pause* “He needs a bath!”

(As she left, she threw her dog in the pool and just left him. We called the police and they agreed to take the dog back to her. The owners of the pool felt the need to drain and refill it, and they forwarded the costs onto the woman. She apparently paid it while screeching that she’d be going to “different dog groomers” in future.)

Under-weary Of What You’re Wearing

, , | Right | April 26, 2019

(I work at an inner-city pool and, for some reason, we have a big problem with swimmers trying to swim in their underwear. A male swimmer steps out of the change-room wearing boxer shorts and heads towards the hot tub.)


Customer: “Huh?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but you cannot enter the pool unless you have proper swimwear.”

Customer: “What? What’s wrong with these?”

Me: “Those are underwear, and it’s a health and safety policy that all swimmers must wear proper bathing suits when entering the pool.”

Customer: “I’m only going into the hot tub.”

Me: “That is considered  a part of the pool.”

Customer: “What if you pretend you didn’t see me? I’ll only be a few minutes.”

Me: “How about no?”

Customer:Argh! Fine.”

(The customer storms off towards the change-room. A few minutes later, I hear the change room open and turn to see the same customer from before, now in swim trunks.)

Customer: “Now can I go in?”

Me: “Uh… yeah.”

(I still don’t understand why he didn’t wear those swim trunks in the first place.)

Beginning To See Why She Divorced Him

, , , | Right | April 26, 2019

(Unfortunately, we’ve had a pool fouling and have to close down the kiddie pool. Luckily, we have another pool completely separate from the kiddie pool that will remain open. I am telling patrons that we have to close this pool, but they are welcome to go into the other pool after they shower. Most are already leaving due to the mess, except one father and his kids.)

Me: “I’m very sorry, but we’ve unfortunately had a fouling and need to close this pool.”

Father: “What?”

Me: “The other pool is open, so you can go there after you shower. We just need to close this one so we can clean it.”

Father: “You’re serious?”

(I can’t help but glance at the mess that’s in the pool, wondering if he seriously wants to keep swimming in it.)

Me: “Unfortunately, yes, it just happened, but you can still use our other pool after you shower.”

Father: “We only got here half an hour ago! I can’t believe you’re closing the pool on us!”

Me: “Oh, no, the whole pool isn’t shut down, just the kiddie pool. We’re still open and you can use the other pool while we clean this one.”

Father: “I paid to only use this pool. We only came for this pool, and after thirty minutes you’re kicking us out of it.”

(I quickly realize that he won’t be happy with whatever answer I give him, and my coworkers are waiting to scoop and put in chemicals. So, I give him another option.)

Me: “Well, I’m sorry, sir, but these events are unpredictable. I’m really sorry this happened, but if you don’t want to use the other pool, I’m sure the front desk will give you a refund. Or they could even give you some free passes.”

Father: “Really? Just like that?”

Me: “Uh-huh!”

Father: “So, will they get my ex-wife to give me more time with the kids?”

(I didn’t know what to say to this, but I didn’t have to say anything. The man stormed off, ordering his kids to follow and muttering about how we were closing the pool for no reason. I felt bad that the guy was having a bad day, but there was another pool they could have used and others did.)

Page 1/2912345...Last