(I start working at a local take-and-bake pizza place, and instantly become good friends with my boss. A few months after I started working there, my husband gets sick and has to stop working, as do I to care for him. I walk into the pizza place with $5 to my name to get my children some dinner.)

Boss: “What pizza do you want?”

Me: “Just a $5 [Specialty Pizza].”

Boss: “Why not let the kids pick [Personal Pizzas] for themselves?”

Me: “Because I only have $5, so the $2.50 pizza with my discount is literally all I can afford right now…”

Boss: “You come with me!”

(She takes us into the back and gives each of my children their own personal pizza and one pizza for my husband and me.)

Boss: “Enjoy your dinner, and have a great night!”

(It wasn’t much, but that pizza got us two full meals and through a rough time.)

(I work for a one location pizza shop. A woman calls and orders a pizza and a salad and spends around fifteen minutes ordering, price checking, and deciding on her personal pizza and salad. My driver returns and ten minutes after she calls.)

Me: “Hello, thank you for calling [Pizza Shop] Pizza! Will this be for pickup or delivery?”

Woman: “Neither. I got a pizza from ya’ll and there’s a problem.”

Me: “I’m so sorry to hear that! How may I assist you?”

Woman: “See, when I ordered, I thought ya’ll were [Chain Pizza Shop].”

Me: “…I’m sorry?”

Woman: “So, yeah, I don’t want this. Send the driver back with my money.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, I can’t do that.”

Woman: “Why not?”

Me: “I answer every phone call with our shop’s name. You ordered from us; we fulfilled your order. Our transaction is done.”

Woman: “I must not have heard you. I don’t want this, though.”

(This continues on in this manner for another few minutes while my driver is stand there watching me incredulously.)

Me: “I don’t know what to tell you, ma’am. I will not send my driver out with a refund. This shop has never been [Chain Pizza Shop], this phone number has never been associated with [Chain Pizza Shop]. There is not a [Chain Pizza Shop] for ten miles.”

Woman: “I want to speak with your manager.”

Me: “Ma’am, I am the manager.”

Woman: “I want speak with your supervisor.”

Me: “That’s me right now.”

Woman: “Well, who’s above you?”

Me: “That’d be our owner. He’ll be here at 11 am tomorrow morning.”

Woman: “What’s your name?”

Me: “My name is [My Name], ma’am.”

Woman: “Well, I’m going to call him and tell him how rude and unhelpful you’ve been.”

Me: “You tell him whatever you feel you need to, ma’am. Have a great night!”

(My husband and I are ordering at a pizza restaurant.)

Husband: “We’ll take a number four but with no mushrooms.”

Me: “I’m allergic and I like breathing.”

Waitress: “No problem.”

Waitress: *arriving with pizza* “They made it without mushrooms.”

(I find it odd that she says that, considering we don’t see any mushrooms, but I decide to eat it anyway. The following happens about half-way through my first slice.)

Husband: “STOP!” *slaps pizza from my hand* “You have hives all over your throat!”

Me: *grabbing mirror to check* “They must have put mushrooms on it.” *grabs epi-pen from purse while he calls manager*

Husband: “We ordered without mushrooms and we told the waitress she was allergic.”

Manager: “Yeah, so we took them off.”

Husband: “Took them off? As in they were on here and then you removed them?”

Manager: “Yes, we forgot and made it with mushrooms but we got them all off.”

(I am now ready to head to the ER.)

Manager: “Stop! You have to pay!”

(It’s the weekend, and my family decides to order some pizza for dinner. We order a couple pizzas and some sides for delivery.)

Delivery Guy: “Okay, here’s your food. That’ll be [amount].”

Me: *handing over money and a tip* “Thanks!”

(We settle down to eat, only to realize one of the pizzas was made incorrectly. Unfortunately, I don’t like toppings on my pizza and thus can’t eat the pizza as it is, so I call up to complain.)

Employee: “Thank you for calling [Pizza Restaurant]! Can I take your order?”

Me: “Actually, we just had some food delivered and realized part of the order was wrong.”

Employee: “Oh! I’m sorry about that! What was wrong with it?”

Me: “One of the pizzas was supposed to be half pepper and onion, and the other half was suppose to be plain cheese, but it arrived as half pepper and half onion.”

(The employee gets some more information about our order, then goes to check the original order and let the manager know the situation.)

Employee: “All right, I found your original order here, and it says ‘Large pizza – half pepper and onion, half cheese.’ So it seems it was written down right, but the kitchen staff made it wrong.”

Me: “Okay.”

Employee: “My manager said we can make a new pizza and send it out to you. Is that all right?”

Me: “Yes, thank you.”

(The call ends, and pizza number two arrives about 20 minutes later.)

Delivery Guy: “Here’s your pizza! Sorry about the screw-up!”

Me: “Thanks!”

(The delivery guy leaves, I open up the box and become pissed. Pizza number two is also half pepper and half onion. I call them again.)

Employee: “Thank you for calling [Pizza Restaurant]! Can I take your order?”

Me: “I called a short while ago to complain about my pizza being made wrong. I just received the new pizza, and it was made wrong in the exact same way as the first one!”

Employee: “I’m so sorry! Let me get my manager for you.”

(I wait, hungry and agitated, as the employee fetches her manager and explains the situation.)

Manager: “Hello? My employee told me what’s happened. I am terribly sorry about that. If you’d like, we can send you another pizza, and I’ll give you a credit for a free large pizza on a future order for all the trouble.”

Me: “That’s fine.”

(We wait for pizza number three, and by this point it’s getting pretty late. The same delivery guy arrives for the third time.)

Delivery Guy: “Hello, again! Sorry about all the trouble you’ve been having with this. I’ve got your pizza here, and this time I checked it myself before I left the restaurant. Why don’t you check it yourself before I leave.”

Me: “Thanks.”

(I check the pizza, and this time it’s made right.)

Me: “Finally! Sorry you had to come out here so much.”

Delivery Guy: “It’s no problem. Actually, I’m off the clock now, but I offered to bring you your pizza since it’s on my way home.”

Me: “Oh! Thank you!”

(After a brief moment of thought, I get an idea.)

Me: “Hey, before you go, do you like pepper and onions on pizza?”

Delivery Guy: “Yeah, sure?”

Me: *giving him pizza number two, which remains untouched* “Then, here! Have some free pizza!”

Delivery Guy: “Oh! You don’t have to do that!”

Me: “Go ahead! You’ve been a lot of help, and besides, there’s no way we’re going to be able to eat all this pizza.”

Delivery Guy: *taking the pizza* “Well, thanks! You have a good night!”

Me: “You, too!”

(I work at a pizza place that often allows customers to switch out ingredients, as long as they are not adding any extra.)

Customer: “I want the all meat with no sausage, add bacon, and add green pepper.”

Me: “Great, sir. We can take the sausage off, but unfortunately I can only add one other ingredient. You’ll have to choose which one you’d like.”

Customer: “What if I add bacon but only get a spritz of green pepper?”

Me: “You’d still be getting one too many.”

Customer: “What about a dash?”

Me: “Sir, the manner in which we apply the ingredient won’t make any difference.”