Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

We’re Going To Need More Than Photoshop…

, , , , | Right | November 24, 2021

Me: “Here are the photographs from the shoot yesterday.”

Client: “Nice shots; I like this one from behind the man. Can you just flip the image so we can see his face and not the back of his head?”

Me: “You want me to turn him around in the photograph so you can see his face?”

Client: “Yes, and maybe we can make him black. Do you have Photoshop?”

Photografree

, , , , | Right | October 12, 2021

I do photography on the side as something to keep me busy when I feel like it and do software development as my daily job. I get messaged on my personal Facebook account a week and a half before their wedding on the 4th of July weekend.

Client: “Hi! I’m getting married on July 3rd and my photographer just dropped out. I only need 2-2.5 hours from around 10 or 10:15 to 12:15 or 12:30?”

Me: “Sorry to hear that happened. I can definitely do that! I would bill just for three hours at $100, just for some leeway for shots after the wedding with family and friends. Let me know what you think.”

In my experience as I’ve done a few weddings, a little extra time never hurts.

Client: “Thank you! I will probably take it! I will let you know. Do you have some pics of your work?”

Me: “Sounds good! You are always welcome! I do! Here’s some of what I’ve done in the past year.”

I insert my (watermarked) portfolio.

Client: “Thank you! So would we do more of a 10-1 thing?”

Me: “You are welcome! Yep! That would give me enough time to get any shots you want outside of the wedding.”

No response after that. The next day:

Me: “I was just checking in to see if you are still interested in me being your wedding photographer. I wanted to scout the location of your wedding this weekend to see what I would need to bring. I also want to get in touch with the venue operators and see if there are any regulations regarding photography at their place of business. Please let me know by tomorrow, or I will assume that you have chosen someone else to do photography for your wedding. Thank you!”

Client: “Hello! I should know within the next couple of hours if we will be receiving pictures for a gift or not! I will let you know ASAP! Also, the wedding is actually at my parent’s house.”

The evening of July 2nd involved a Coors Light or two. July 3rd involved me sleeping in and enjoying my long weekend.

About To Get Meta With The Data

, , , , | Right | October 9, 2021

Client: “I would like if you could scan about 400 old 35mm films with pictures from my vacations back in the ’80s, and put them on an external SSD.”

Me: “Sure, that can be done.”

Client: “Great. Could you also write the dates and locations on each photo? Like it is on my iPhone?”

Me: “Yeah… about that…”

When This Is Your Job, They All Look The Same

, , , , , | Learning | March 28, 2021

I am a pre-k teacher and it is picture day. I have a set of identical twin girls in my classroom. Their mom asks me if I mind asking the photographer to get a picture of the two of them together. The school has used this photographer in the past and I know he’s usually willing to take a photo of siblings together. His assistant comes into the room, and one of the children she asks for, by first and last name, is one of the twins.

Me: “Would it be okay if [Other Twin’s First And Last Name] came, as well? They’re sisters and their mom would like to get a picture of the girls together.”

Mind you, I have both girls standing next to me. The only difference is that one wears glasses, but without the glasses or personally knowing the girls, you wouldn’t be able to tell them apart.

Assistant: *Rolls her eyes* “Are they siblings? Because we don’t do friends.”

There’s a very long pause before I respond.

Me: “They’re identical twins.”

She blushed and muttered an apology and took both girls. The girls thought it was very funny that the lady didn’t see that they were identical.

Wish You Could Have Taken A Photo Of His Face

, , , , | Right | February 24, 2021

I’ve been the official photographer of a local racetrack for several years. Usually, a pilot can buy all the photos of his track day for thirty euros or a single picture for ten euros. This particular client has been very annoying, asking for his photos many times during the day, complaining about the quality, and being very rude to my coworkers.

After a long time in my shop, he selects five pictures out of eighty. We say that he could save twenty euros by buying the full service, but he refuses. He ends up buying five single pictures for fifty euros.

When he exits my office with the receipt, he realizes that he has done a very stupid thing. He asks me if he can talk with my boss about that.

My boss just says, “You’ve just done it, and I’m sorry. We can’t do anything.”

Karma feels good.