Customer: “I’d like to pick up my printed photos.”

Me: “Sure.”

Customer: “Thank you.”

(Another customer requests their photos while the lady begins scribbling on the envelope. After helping the customer I offer to help the lady.)

Me: “Was there anything else I could help you with?”

Customer: “Yes, I wanted to know what the price per print was.”

Me: “Oh, looks like you ordered 4×6 prints, so the price is 32 cents per print.”

Customer: “Yes, but she said she’d make it 25 cents per photo.”

Me: “All right, once I help this customer, I’ll get the calculator to help you.”

(After taking the other customer’s photo, I return with the calculator.)

Me: “All right, it looks like the $3 discount covered one set of the prints, leaving your total, before tax, at $12.54 for 49 prints.”

(Customer punches numbers into the calculator.)

Customer: “But this says 29 cents per print.”

Me: *after reviewing the calculations* “Oh, you divided the full cost of the order before applying the discount.”

Customer: “No, let me show you.”

(The customer carries out calculation again and shows that her total should be $13.07 after tax, then calculates without the discount applied to the total.)

Customer: “See!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but it looks like the discount was applied; the total you were charged after tax was $13.07, which is only slightly above the 25 cents per print promised.”

Customer: “But I was charged 29 cents per photo! This is why I stopped coming here years ago. You people can’t even spare a cent to be generous.”

(Choosing to give up explaining, I allowed her to leave after a short apology to her. While taking a passport photograph for the next customer, I thought about how obsessive one must be to concern themselves about a single dollar’s difference, if we had actually neglected to apply the discount.)

(I work in a shop that lets customers print photos using self-service kiosks, but we are there to help customers who may need it. A young girl of around 13 to14 years of age is uploading photos from her phone to print out. I ask her if she needs any help, but she declines. A short while later her order receipt prints out behind the counter, which tells me she’s ordered her prints on the one-hour service. However, she’s still standing at the kiosk, obviously waiting for her photos to print.)

Me: “Are you uploading any more photos or have you finished?”

Customer: “Oh! Oh, I’ve finished.”

Me: “Okay, you’ve put those through on the hour service so you can collect them at 2:30.”

Customer: *stares blankly at me*

Me: *stares back*

Customer: “So… they’re going to take an hour?”

Me: “Yeah, you put them through on the hour service.”

Customer: “Oh… do you need me to pay?”

Me: “Yes, please!”

(She pays, and then stares at me again.)

Customer: “So they’re definitely going to be an hour?”

Me: “Yes, they’ll be ready at 2:30! Thanks!”

(She stared at me for a few seconds longer, and then finally left. The best part? She was wearing a t-shirt that had “IDIOT” written on it.)

(I own a custom photo lab/frame shop/studio and do lots of restoration work on photos, something we’re very well known for. A first time client comes in with an old print that has quite a bit of damage and will take a good amount of work to restore. After looking at it I tell him what we can do and the cost.)

Me: “This is going to take a while to repair; there’s lots of damage. We’re going to have to rebuild part of the face on two people and fix the discoloration in several places. The cost for the Photoshop work will be [total].”

Client: “That’s a lot of money; I don’t know if it’s worth it.”

Me: “Well, it’s a lot of work. Only you can decide if getting the image restored is worth it. The memories that go with it are the reason most people want them restored.”

Client: “Tell you what we can do. You restore it and I’ll take a look to see if I’m willing to pay for it and how much.”

Me: “No. If you want it restored you’ll need to pay in advance now.”

Client: “I’m not paying until I see it and then I’ll decide what I’ll pay.”

Me: “Doesn’t work that way. You have no idea the amount of time I will spend and the skill needed to make it look right. This is the price; it’s your choice to pay it or not. But the work only gets done once you pay it.”

Client: “I know it’s all a computer doing it for you. All you do is click the fix button and it’s done in five seconds.”

(This is a bad thing to say to someone like me. My wife will tell you how I yell at TV shows that make it seem that all you have to do is click and the computer not only enhances an image but does all kinds of impossible things automatically.)

Me: “Sorry, that’s not how it works. All the artwork to restore is done by hand; there are no secret plug-ins that do it automatically. If you don’t want to pay the price, then we’re done talking.”

(He ranted a bit more trying to convince me that he understood my job far better than I do since he saw it on a TV show, and they just clicked a button and it was instantly done. I held my ground on the price and not doing the work unless he paid in advance. I knew if I had done the work he would have pulled the “The work is done, so you might as well get what I offer for it than nothing” stunt. It’s good owning the place. I can tell people to take a hike when needed.)

This story is part of the Artists-Versus-Clients roundup!

Read the next Artists-Versus-Clients roundup story!

Read the Artists-Versus-Clients roundup!

(I’m the customer in this story and I’ve called the photo store.)

Owner: “Hi, how may I help you?”

Me: *using a fake old-man voice* “Hi, I need to get some color prints made.”

Owner: “No problem. 35mm negatives?”

Me: “Yes. I took these years ago. The prints I have are just gray and fading.”

Owner: “Black and white negatives?”

Me: “Yah, that’s why I want them printed as color.”

Owner: “Um… you can’t get color prints from black and white negatives, sir.”

Me: “But it’s color print paper, right?”

Owner: “But… you see…”

Me: *voice slowly returning to normal* “But you really shouldn’t take silly requests from your brother-in-law.”

Owner: “Oh, hi. Hah, I’ve been asked stupider things.”

Me: “Really?”

(Of course, this was many years before NAR. I’ve learned a lot since.)

(I just recently finished my Master’s from a prestigious college. I still work for this retailer since student loans payments are high and they actually pay me good money at this store, working in the photo center, since I have been there for many years and the job market in my field is lacking at the moment.)

Customer: “Why are my pictures all blurry?”

Me: “The resolution of the photo was not high enough to be printed clearly.”

Customer: “These are professional photos taken by a PROFESSIONAL. They are of the highest quality possible.”

Me: “How did this professional send them to you.”

Customer: “By email.”

(This happens a lot and few know that with certain emailing services, they will compress the photo being sent in order for it to email properly. Basically, emailing even a “professional photo” will ruin the quality. I explain this to the customer.)

Customer: “Yes but this is by a professional. He knows what he’s doing and what he’s talking about, unlike you.”

Me: “Ma’am, I have a Bachelor’s degree in Photography and a Masters from one of the best universities in the country in Digital Curation and Preservation. With all due respect, I KNOW what I am talking about.”

Customer: “If you had those degrees you wouldn’t be working here. I don’t believe you. You guys are just doing a crappy job printing my professional wedding photos.”

Me: “The reason why I am working here is none of your concern. I am trying to explain to you why your photos are not coming out clear. We have a PROFESSIONAL printer. It is not our fault they came out this way. If you would just contact your photographer and have them put it on a flash drive or CD, the quality will be much better and we can print them.”

Customer: “Clearly you have no idea what you are talking about when it comes to professional photography. I am going to the drugstore down the street to print these.”

(Let’s see if she finds someone who knows what they are talking about there!)