A Paucity Of Verbosity

| Working | November 25, 2012

(I need to get some prescription medication, and decide to use the opportunity to get some exfoliating cream, which helps remove dead skin.)

Me: “Hi, this is a prescription I need filled. Can you also tell me where you keep the exfoliating creams?”

Cashier: “…The what?”

Me: “Exfoliating creams?”

Cashier: *slowly* “Ex-fooo-liating creams…” *turns to her manager* “What’s exfoliating creams?”

Manager: *to me* “They’re right this way.”

Cashier: “Sorry, I haven’t learnt big words yet!”

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Might We Prescribe A New Job

| Working | November 22, 2012

(I’ve just come from the emergency department of the hospital, with instructions to fill two prescriptions immediately. I’m obviously sick and having difficulty breathing. It’s about 9:30 PM, which is 30 minutes before closing.)

Me: “I have a severe corn allergy, so can you please double-check the ingredients on those before filling them?”

Pharmacist: “No.”

Me: “…Pardon? ”

Pharmacist: “Almost all medications are made with corn starch, you know. I don’t think I can fill them.”

Me: “My understanding is that very few prescriptions meds have corn in the them. Can you check them please?”

Pharmacist: “No. I don’t have the ingredients.”

Me: “Aren’t they on the bottle?”

Pharmacist: “No.”

Me: “Can you look them up somewhere? Online or in a compendium?”

Pharmacist: “No.”

Me: “I really need these medications immediately.”

Pharmacist: *sighs* I guess I could leave them for someone tomorrow, and they could call the company.”

Me: “I need them tonight. I’m not sure what to do.”

Pharmacist: “I’m sure you’ll be fine. There’s only a little bit of corn starch in a pill.”

My Husband: “NO! Didn’t you hear her? She’s ALLERGIC!”

Pharmacist: “Well, there’s nothing I can do tonight. I guess I can keep these until tomorrow and someone else will deal with it.” *wanders off*

(I called another pharmacy in the same chain, and they were able to check the ingredients immediately. We retrieved my prescriptions from the unhelpful pharmacist, and my husband made a complaint the next day. It turned out he was a temp and was fired.)

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This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 16

| Right | November 13, 2012

Customer: “Excuse me, miss? I’d like a $20 iTunes card, but there are none here.”

Me: “Oh, yes. Unfortunately we haven’t received that shipment yet. But we do have the $10 cards.”

Customer: *frustrated* “But I want a $20 card.”

Me: “Well, ma’am, you could always buy two $10 cards instead.”

Customer: *yelling* “That doesn’t equal 20 dollars!” *storms out of the store*


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Discretion Is The Better Part Of Disclosure

| Working | October 10, 2012

Coworker: “Hello, how may I help you?”

Customer: “I need… um…”

(The customer is clearly too embarrassed to speak, so she pulls out a piece of paper and writes what she wants down.)

Coworker: *reads the paper and looks over at me* “HEY, [my name], WHERE DO WE KEEP THE THRUSH CREAM?”

Me: *facepalm*

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Contraception Misperceptions

| Right | October 5, 2012

(I am a pharmacist working at 24-hour pharmacy. This takes place on a late Sunday evening.)

Female Caller: “Hello, um… I… um… you know the morning after pill?”

Me: “Yes, certainly. What would you like to know about it?”

Female Caller: “Is there an anti-morning after pill?”

Me: “Sorry? An anti-morning after pill?”

Female Caller: “Yes. You see, this guy, he came around today, and he brought some flowers and everything, so now I’m kind of regretting taking that pill. So is there an anti-morning after pill I could take?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry, there isn’t such a thing.”

Female Caller: “Oh, that is a shame. Do you think they will make one?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry, but I really don’t think they will.”

Female Caller: “Really? Oh, that is a bummer.” *hangs up*

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