(After delivering medicine and receiving payment by a customer, I’m ready to leave so I can go home.)

Me: “All right, Ms. [Customer], have a great evening.”

Customer: “All right, I’ll probably be calling you on Mon… Oh, wait, y’all are closed Monday.”

Me: “No, ma’am, we’re open on Monday, same hours as usual.”

Customer: “Oh, right, tomorrow is Saturday; that’s what I meant.”

Me: “No, ma’am, we’re open tomorrow, as well. We are open every day except Sunday.”

Customer: “My stomach has been hurting. I’m gonna take some of the medicine now.”

(The medicine in question is a cream for itching/discomfort on the skin.)

Me: “Uh…”

Customer: “You know, I don’t have any kids, so I can buy myself anything I want.”

Me: “Oh, well, that sounds really nice.”

Customer: “I used to live in New York, you see.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

Customer: “I had to go to the movies to see how a baby came out.”

Me: “Pardon?”

Customer: “I’ve never been married, so I had to go to the movies to see how a baby came out.”

Me: “Oh, really?”

Customer: “Okay.”

Me: “Okay, Ms. [Customer], have a nice evening.”

(I work in a community pharmacy. I cannot tell you how many times I have heard this story in some variation, as have my staff and coworkers in this field.)

Patient: *comes up to the counter* “Hi, I need to fill my medication.”

Clerk: “Oh, of course. Which medication did you need today?”

Patient: “I don’t know; it’s on my profile.”

(The clerk reviews the patient’s profile, which has more than 25 prescriptions dating back years.)

Clerk: “Do you know which one? There’s a bit of a list on your profile.”

(At this point, they will usually say one of two things:)

Patient: “I don’t know. Just fill all of them.”

(Or…)

Patient: “It’s the white pill.”

(This is where the clerk will grab one of the pharmacists.)

Pharmacist: “I’m sorry, sir, but we can’t just fill everything on your profile, as we don’t know which of these medications you take or have stopped taking.”

(Also, the staff hate having to fill a dozen or more prescriptions, only for the patient to say they need one or two of them; the rest we have to put back, wasting all the time and effort we needed to fill.)

Pharmacist: “Do you know what you take it for? Diabetes? Blood pressure?”

Patient: “I don’t know. It’s the white pill.”

Pharmacist: “Most of the pills on your profile are white. Do you know how many times you take it? Was it big or small? The first letter of the name or the doctor who wrote it?”

Patient: “How am I supposed to know?! You’re the pharmacist! You should know this! IT’S A WHITE PILL! I KNOW IT’S ON THE COMPUTER!”

Pharmacist: “Sir, I need a little more information to go on than just the color. Here’s our card; you can go home, find it, and then call it in. Or bring the bottle with you next time and we can help you more.”

(The patient stomped off. Seriously, if you come to the pharmacy, please know something about what you want to pick up. The vast majority of all the pills on the shelf are white. Bring the bottle, take a picture of the bottle, write down the name. Something!)

I am picking up a small item at a well-known pharmacy chain and I use a self-checkout machine with a sign that says, “No cash, card only.” That’s fine because I don’t have any cash on me anyway; however, it is late, and in a moment of auto-pilot, I press the “cashback” button. 

“Is this amount correct?” the machine asks me, and I press the “no” button, but somehow it is too late and the machine has already processed my payment. One staff member comes over and gives me a huge eye roll and has to find a manager to fix it. 

The manager comes over and has to unlock the machine and manually take out the cash box to give me the cash. “I’m sorry,” I say, and offer to take a refund on the cashback but she says that’s not possible and makes a big show of how annoyed she is opening the machine. She says to me, “It’s a really big sign.”

Listen, I work in customer service, too. I’m sure these staff members deal with people who make this mistake all day and I’m certain that it is super annoying, but I’m human, okay? Save your snide comments for rude people instead of shaming the apologetic ones.

I work as a veterinary assistant at a cat clinic and know basic information about feline pharmacology. My friend’s cat takes 5 mg of a medication every day to control stress-mediated urinary crystals. His prescription is for 45 of the 10 mg tablets, with directions to give half a tablet each day.

My friend went to pick up the cat’s prescription from a large corporate pharmacy after work and did not think to check the prescription until she got home. What the pharmacy gave her was 90 of the 10 mg capsules, which cannot be cut in half, with instructions to give one capsule each day, which would be a double dose. The margin for error in many cat medications is pretty small, and a double dose could well cause serious harm. They also charged her about three times what that particular drug should cost from that pharmacy.

My friend called the pharmacy to complain and was put on with the pharmacy manager, who angrily insisted she had called the vet, the vet had changed the prescription, and the pharmacy had filled it according to the vet’s instructions. My friend knew this was nonsense but couldn’t prove it at that time because the vet clinic had closed for the evening.

The next day, my friend called the vet, whose receptionists confirmed that the prescription hadn’t changed and the pharmacy had never called them. My friend went back to the pharmacy after work with the information from the vet clinic, and they refunded her money and filled the correct prescription so fast she didn’t even get to ask for a manager. Another friend and I are encouraging her to make a formal complaint with corporate, as the mistake of instructing a patient to take a double dose could get the patient killed if the drug was, say, heart medication or a sedative.

The county fair is currently going on, and a band popular in the 60s and 70s is playing tonight. I am delivering medicine to a customer.

Customer:
“Are you going to the fair tonight? I know a lot of people are going tonight. Hey, what are [Band]?

Me:
“They’re a band that was popular in the 70s, I think. Have you ever heard [lists off their most popular songs]?”

Customer:
“Yeah, I guess. I didn’t know it was their song, though. I’m too old to keep up with that stuff!”

I thanked her and left, trying not to laugh at the fact that the band had formed in the early sixties, before my parents were even born, and I knew who they were. She had to have been about in her thirties at the time they were popular. But hey, maybe thirty is the new sixty for her!