Doesn’t Have The Drive To Study Geography

| WV, USA | Extra Stupid, Geography, Transportation

(As I ring up a customer’s purchases, she gets chatty.)

Customer: “My neighbor is from Puerto Rico.”

Me: “That’s neat!”

Customer: “Yeah. Have you ever been to Puerto Rico?”

Me: “No, I haven’t. It would be nice to visit, though.”

Customer: “I think I’m going to try to go with them to visit sometime.”

Me: “That sounds fun.”

Customer: “How long do you think it takes to drive to Puerto Rico?”

Me: *thinking she’s kidding* “Oh, about as long as it takes to invent a floating car.”

Customer: “Oh. So, like, a long time?”

Me: “Yeah…”


Trash-Talking Hits The Bottom Of The Barrel

, | Malden, MA, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular

(I work in a city where the people have to buy city trash-bags that are expensive. We had to get rid of our trash barrel from outside the store because people started throwing away their home trash in it.)

Customer: *walking in with bag full of trash* “Do you have a barrel so I can throw away my trash?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we had to get rid of it.”

Customer: “Well, why?”

Me: “Because people started to bring their home trash to our store and leave it around our barrel because they didn’t want to buy city bags.”

Customer: “Well, that’s stupid. Where am I supposed to throw away my trash?”

Me: “At home with your city bags?”


You’ve Got Me In A Box Here…

| Australia | Crazy Requests

Customer: “Hi. I need some tablets. You know the one I got last time? I didn’t come here but it comes in a box.”

Me: “…”


I Can Hear You Dumb And Clear

| Du Quoin, IL, USA | Bizarre, Technology

(I have just started working at my local pharmacy. It’s my first time answering the phone and I’m really nervous.)

Me: “Pharmacy, this is [My Name]. Can I help you?”


Me: “Can I help you, ma’am?”


Me: “Hello… ma’am?”


Me: *holding phone away from my ear at this point* “Loud and clear, ma’am.”

Caller: “Oh, good. I just wanted to make sure my phone was working.” *click*

Me: *stares at phone*


Didn’t See The Smoke Signals, Part 2

, | PA, USA | Extra Stupid

(I work in the front end of a pharmacy retailer that recently stopped selling cigarettes in an effort to promote customer health. It’s been almost two years, but exchanges like this still happen regularly.)

Customer: “Hi, I’ll have a carton of [Brand] cigarettes.”

(I look behind me to where the cigarettes used to be stored, where there is now a large sign with a crossed out cigarette and a slogan that reads: “Quitting starts here.”)

Customer: “…You don’t sell cigarettes, do you?”

Didn’t See The Smoke Signals

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