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Manager Versus The Couponator

, , , , | Right | August 21, 2023

I work in a retail pharmacy with a drive-thru window. On numerous occasions, people would just wait in the drive-thru for their prescriptions to be processed. It didn’t matter to them if there were people behind them. Every once in a while, someone would flat-out refuse to move.

Drug reps gave us one-time use coupons for customers that are prescribed various brand medications. A lady is given the coupon.

Me: “We’ve processed that coupon for you. Please remember that these are one-time use, so you won’t be able to use this aga—”

The customer waves me off and drives away mid-sentence.

On her next refill, she comes through the drive-thru and is told her normal co-pay price.

Customer: “What! I should have that coupon applied!”

Me: “That’s a one-time use coupon, and you’ve already—”

Customer: “You get me my refill at the correct price, or I’m not moving!”

With that, she actually crosses her arms like a toddler having a tantrum. I call my manager over and explain that she refuses to move until she gets her meds at the coupon price.

Manager: “Ma’am, I understand—”

Customer: “—I want you to—”

Manager: “—Ma’am! Has anyone ever told you that it’s very rude to interrupt someone?”

Customer: “I’m not interrupt—”

Manager: “—annoying, isn’t it? It’s also annoying to hold up all the other customers behind you in the drive-thru. Therefore, I am not going to even entertain a single word you say until you pull up to the front of the store, and we can discuss your issue over the counter.”

Customer: “But I—”

Manager: “—I will not be discussing this matter anymore at this window. Drive around to the front, or be escorted out by the police. I will be waiting.”

With that, he closes the window and waits at the front. She does eventually come inside and he gives her a detailed explanation of what one-time coupons are. Every time she tries to counter with a “yes, but” he interrupts and repeats the question “do you understand what a one-time coupon” is? 

Eventually, she got so frustrated she left, and hasn’t been back since!

Related:
The Couponator 41: The Saga Of The Long-Suffering Wife
The Couponator 40: Armageddon
The Couponator 39: The Yarn Of Time
The Couponator 38: The Sandwich Of Frustration
The Couponator 37: The Year Of Reckoning

Better Than Not Getting Notifications When You Need Them, I Guess

, , , , , | Working | August 18, 2023

My wife is in the hospital on Monday and Tuesday. She tells me they have sent a prescription to our local pharmacy, so I pick it up Wednesday morning before 9:00 am. (It isn’t time-sensitive.)

On Thursday, around noon, I get a text saying [Wife]’s prescription is ready.

Wife: *Confused* “I guess it’s possible they put in the antibiotic too, just in case.”

On Friday morning, I go back to the pharmacy.

Pharmacy Assistant: “That prescription was already picked up.”

Me: “Why did you send me this text, then?” 

Pharmacy Assistant: “You must have picked it up after our cutoff.”

So, apparently, if I don’t pick up a prescription before they open for the day, they will send me a reminder the following day.

They Didn’t Make You Do The Thing, Ma’am

, , , , | Healthy | CREDIT: gwynforred | August 18, 2023

I work for a mail-order pharmacy. A patient called to reorder her birth control, and she started ranting.

Patient: “The last time you sent out my birth control, you sent out the wrong quantity, and I got pregnant!”

The wrong QUANTITY. So, we sent her the right thing, and it didn’t get delayed in the mail, but it was short, so instead of using the little she had to give her time to get MORE, she let it run out and then STILL decided to have sex, and it’s OUR fault?

I made sure we sent out the right amount this time; heavens forbid it happen again!

That being said, a coworker pointed out that I messed up because I didn’t offer the patient a chance to talk to the pharmacist, which we are supposed to do when they have “side effects”!

The Blame Game Is Not The Best Medicine

, , , , , , , | Healthy | August 14, 2023

Pharmacists buy meds from our company through their dedicated software. Monday morning, there’s a ticket in the system asking us to call back a pharmacist. The ticket says that the pharmacist placed her order Friday afternoon and didn’t receive the products the next day, which isn’t normal since we deliver twice a day.

Me: “Hello, I am [My Name] from [Company]. I’m calling you back regarding the problem with your order.”

Pharmacist #1: “Ugh, finally! I’ve been waiting for your call for days!”

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that you had a problem with your order. Unfortunately, we don’t have any orders from you since Friday. I was wondering if you could place your last order again with me right now, so we—”

Pharmacist #1: “WHAT?! ALL OF MY ORDERS?!” *Mumbling* “It’s so inconvenient to call me now, the drugstore is packed, I can’t believe it…”

Me: “Whatever would be easier for you: the whole order if you have the option to send it again or just a specific product. Would you prefer if I called you back this afternoon?”

Pharmacist #1: “I’m not here this afternoon!” *Mumbling again* “This is so inconvenient. Why are you even calling me right now?”

Me: “I could call you back tomorrow or at a quieter time if—”

Pharmacist #1: “Well, I don’t want to wait until tomorrow! I want my order delivered!”

Me: “Okay. Are you in front of your computer? Could you check the order history and—”

Pharmacist #1: “What? I won’t do anything. I just want you to fix it. We didn’t do anything wrong.”

Me: “Actually, I can’t find your order on our system. If you could check the order history and give me the order number it would help me research it. Sometimes a specific product causes an issue, or your software may have received a bad update, or maybe there was an error message, or—”

Pharmacist #1: “We didn’t do anything; it’s your system’s fault! And I already explained what happened to Whatshername [Her Salesperson]!”

Me: “Okay, could you please explain it to me?”

Pharmacist #1: “No.”

There are a few seconds of silence.

Pharmacist #1: “Well? Is it fixed now?”

Me: “I… I can’t fix the issue if you don’t—”

Pharmacist #1: “I won’t. Can you fix it?”

Me: “Could you try to place your order again so I can see if there’s a problem on our end?”

Pharmacist #1: “NO! Ugh, what an incompetent child. FIX IT!” *Hangs up on me*

I’ve left out a few exchanges that were basically in the same spirit, with the pharmacist cutting me off and questioning my intelligence. I call this client’s salesperson, who unfortunately doesn’t have more information besides, “It worked before Friday, and now it doesn’t.”

I take a five-minute break before calling the drugstore again. A different person picks up the phone.

Me: “Hello. I called earlier about the problem with the order for [Company].”

Pharmacist #2: “Oh, right. We can’t order anything since her son made those changes.”

Me: “I… What changes?”

Pharmacist #2: “She didn’t tell…” *Sighs* “I’m sorry. [Pharmacist #1]’s son started some programming course. He explained that he could encode the different company names with different colors and that it would be easier for us to see the company we’re ordering from. I wasn’t so sure about it, but she’s the boss, so…”

Me: “I see. Could you please take a minute to go in front of a computer and read to me the exact name for our company in the last order?”

The pharmacist’s son tried to insert HTML and CSS (basically web programming language and stylesheet language) in a completely differently coded software. Instead of “Company1” or “Company2”, there was a mixup of names with “<“, “/”, “=”, and a lot of characters that the software couldn’t process. They couldn’t order anything from anyone since that change, and the pharmacist was absolutely adamant that it was our — and all of our competitors’ — system’s fault. Worst client ever!

Jane Complain Reaches The Next Level

, , , , , , , , | Right | August 5, 2023

I worked for a nationwide (USA) chain pharmacy known for their five-mile-long receipts. The first thing you need to know is that most of those receipts were tons of coupons that could be applied to future purchases. Oftentimes, there would also be manufacturers’ coupons further reducing the price of sale items.

A customer who knew how to work the system could stage their purchases into several transactions, using the dollars-off coupons from the first transaction toward the second one, and so forth, often paying next to nothing for their purchases. Some would game the system, find every loophole, and generally abuse the coupon policy.

The second thing you need to know is that there were two types of cards we could provide customers getting a return: a gift card (used if the original purchase was made with a gift card) and a store card (used to refund an item when the customer didn’t have a receipt).

We had a woman who gamed the coupon system to the nth degree. We’ll call her Jane. She had everything organized by purchase, right down to the dollars and cents she expected to pay after taxes. Jane would buy laundry soap, makeup, toilet tissue, or ANYTHING she could to wrack up [Store] coupons, and then she’d buy expensive items with them, making those items essentially free — stuff like diet pills, razor blades, etc.

A few weeks later, she’d bring the expensive things back and return them without a receipt saying, “These didn’t work out, and I can’t find my receipt,” so she could get a store card for the full amount the item cost BEFORE any coupons were applied because corporate made us refund the coupons, too. If Jane paid $2.00 after coupons for a $50.00 box of diet pills, she would still get $50.00 back on her store card. I never thought this was right and grumbled every time I had to process one of these returns.

Jane also bought food with coupons and her EBT (food stamp) card, which I never minded because who doesn’t love a good deal on groceries? Jane didn’t, apparently, because she always returned the non-perishable food items a week later saying she had changed her mind. This was back before our register system could put money back on the EBT cards, so again, we would refund the entire amount, before coupons, onto a store card.

Once a month, Jane would also call corporate and complain about something, and she’d be sent a $25 gift card as an apology. She often used the gift cards toward her sale-item purchases.

No one knew what she did with the store cards, as she never used them at the front register.

One day, I was going on my lunch break and happened to stop by the pharmacy in the back of the store to pick up a prescription. Jane happened to be there and I watched the following.

Pharmacy Tech: “That will be $87.53.”

Jane: “Why so much?”

Tech: “You wouldn’t let us run your insurance for [narcotic medication], so it’s more expensive this time.”

Jane: “Oh, that’s fine, then. Here, you can run each of these until my total is zero.” 

She handed over about eight store cards. The tech swiped them one at a time until Jane’s balance was nothing and handed Jane back the unused cards. Jane picked up her bag and left. It was then my turn.

Tech: “Oh, hey, [My Name]. Here to pick up?”

I had a sudden thought.

Me: “Yes, thanks. Say, does Jane always use store cards to pay for her stuff back here?”

Tech: *Laughing* “Oh, yeah. Every time. She says she could never afford her medicine without them. It’s annoying when there’s a huge line of patients waiting and we have to swipe like, ten cards, to pay for all her prescriptions. It’s even worse when she makes us do her refunds back here.”

Me: *Suppressing a grimace* “Oh, yeah, I can see how that would be a pain. Thanks!”

I immediately went to the front and asked to talk to my store manager in the office.

Manager: “What’s up?”

Me: “So, you know how Jane is always getting store cards, but we never knew what she was doing with them?”

Manager: “I always thought she used them in other stores.”

Me: “Nope. She’s using them to pay for her prescriptions.”

Manager: “Oh. And?”

Me: “Manager, she gets those store cards by having us refund coupons and EBT items.”

Manager: “…And?”

Me: “By extension, she’s using [Store] coupons, manufacturers’ coupons, and food stamps to purchase prescription drugs, including narcotics.”

The manager’s eyes went wide as she followed my logic.

Me: “Which, as a person with a criminal justice degree — like me — can tell you, is highly illegal.”

Manager: “Oohhhhh. Yeah.”

Me: “If anyone found out, we could be in massive trouble. We should notify corporate. I mean, the DEA could own our a**es if they knew.”

Manager: *Smugly* “Leave it to me and enjoy your lunch. I have some phone calls to make.”

I went to lunch and thought nothing more about it.

The next day, there was a new policy printed up which all of us had to sign to state that we understood. The policy stated that STORE cards were no longer allowed to be used on restricted item purchases: tobacco, lighters, cough medication, pseudoephedrine, diet pills, and prescriptions of ANY kind. We also put up multiple signs at the front door, at every register, and in the pharmacy stating this. Gift cards could still be used to purchase these items, as gift cards were generally purchased or were from valid refunds with a receipt.

Furthermore, all refunds without receipts had to be made with a valid ID, and no one could have more than one of these returns per month. All refunds had to be made at the front register and nowhere else. If the value of an item being returned was $50 or more, or the total refund amount was $50 or more, a manager had to come sign off on it. Any employee caught violating the new policy would face write-ups and potential termination. I grinned as I signed.

Later that week, it happened.

Jane walked in with some items in a nondescript bag. She came to the register and dumped them on the counter.

Jane: “I need to return these. I don’t want them anymore.”

Me: “Of course! Do you have your receipt?”

Jane: “No. I don’t keep those things.”

Me: “Ah, okay, then. I’ll just need your ID.”

Jane: “What? Why do you need that? No one’s ever asked for that before.”

Me: “Oh, sorry. We have a new refund policy. Any refund without a receipt has to be made with an ID.”

Jane: “But why?

Me: “I dunno. It’s a corporate thing. Sorry about that.”

Jane: “Get me your manager.”

Me: “Right away!”

I paged the manager to the front register, and she came up and stood beside me.

Manager: “How can I help?”

Jane: “Your cashier asked me for my driver’s license so I can refund these things I do not. Want.”

Manager: “Yes, ma’am. Corporate sent down a new policy to limit store losses from no-receipt refunds. I apologize for the inconvenience.”

Jane: “Where is that in your return policy?”

Manager: *Pointing to all the new signs* “It started a few days ago. We have it posted so our customers can be aware.”

Jane: “Well, I never keep receipts! I have so many that if I kept all of them, my purse wouldn’t close!”

Manager: “I’m very sorry, but we’ve been told there are no exceptions to this.” 

Jane:Fine. I’ll return them somewhere else!”

She gathered up her things and stomped away.

Manager: *To me* “Let me know if she causes any problems.”

A few minutes later, I was ringing up a different customer and heard Jane shouting from the back of the building.

Jane: “WHAT DO YOU MEAN, I CAN’T?!”

Me: *Paging overhead* “Manager to the pharmacy! Manager to the pharmacy!”

I saw the manager make her way to the back, and I returned to the customer I have. I didn’t hear anything else until Jane was storming back up, swearing. She marched out of the store with her phone to her ear, muttering about getting us all fired, especially for “singling her out”.

I could hear parts of the conversation through the automatic door, which opened now and then while she was yelling at some poor soul in customer service. Eventually, Jane left.

As it turned out, corporate was VERY interested in how Jane was buying her prescriptions and agreed with me about the illegality. They contacted the district manager, who put the new return policy in place at all the locations he oversaw — ten stores in total.

Jane’s account with corporate was flagged for fraud and she couldn’t get any more apology gift cards. Ever. They also told her that if she ever attempted to use store cards to buy prescriptions again, they would report her to the police. It was SO satisfying that she’d been caught.

My manager treated me to lunch for it. It was a small reward for stopping a potentially massive fine from the government, but I was happy about how things turned out.

Related:
The Continuing Saga Of Jane Complain
The Saga Of Jane Complain


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