Brain At A Low Dollar Value

| Winchester, VA, USA | Working | December 9, 2014

(I’m at a well known pet store looking at fish since I have recently upgraded my aquarium. I notice that one of the fish that I’m looking at is currently running under a 5 for $5 deal with the store card.)

Me: “Okay. So I think I’ll go ahead and get some of these since they’re 5 for $5. But I want 10.”

Employee: “What? No. You can’t do that. It’s 5 for $5. Not 10 for $5.”

Me: “I understand that. I want 10 fish for $10.”

Employee: “No! It’s only 5 for $5! You can’t do 10 for $10!”

Me: “Just go ahead and give me 10. Let’s just see what happens at the registers.”

(Sure enough when we go to the registers, I am right and I get my 10 for $10. She seems extremely confused by this.)

Employee: “I really didn’t know it worked like that.”

Freely Bathing In Stupidity

| Hiram, GA, USA | Right | December 4, 2014

(The pet store I work at sells coupon books for $20 that are meant for people who are planning to buy puppies or have just bought them. They greatly help with a lot of the up-front cost and include a sign-up for the customer to continue receiving coupons through their email. A customer comes up with a grooming slip to pay for her dog’s grooming. She is holding a puppy kit and reading it over.)

Me: “Hey, how are you today? Find everything okay?”

Customer: “Yeah. Hey, am I allowed to take this book thing home with me and decide later if I want to come back and buy it?”

Me: “Um, no, ma’am. You have to purchase merchandise before you are allowed to leave the store with it.”

Customer:” Oh… Well, I guess I don’t want it then. Maybe I’ll get it some other time.”

(She puts the puppy kit back with the ones at the register and places the grooming slip and a coupon on the counter. I notice the coupon is for $5 off the grooming. In the puppy kit, there is a coupon for a free puppy bath which is what is listed on the grooming slip. To try and save her some money, I decide to explain that to her.)

Customer: “Hmm… sounds good. I’ll take it.”

Me: “So you do want to get a puppy kit?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: *confused look* “Then what are you wanting to get, ma’am?”

Customer: “Just the free bath.”

Me: “Ma’am, the coupon for the free bath is in the puppy kit.”

Customer: “So, I’ll take the coupon. But I don’t think I want the kit today.”

Me: “Ma’am, unless you purchase the book I can’t just give you a free bath. It’s a coupon included in the puppy kit and you can’t use the coupons without buying it first.”

Customer: “Oh… Well, I don’t want the kit thing tonight.”

Me: “Okay. I’ll just run it through with the $5 coupon, then.”

Customer: “Yeah, that would be good. Since I can’t get the bath for free without the book, I’ll at least save something that way…”

They Don’t Have You Covered

| GA, USA | Working | November 9, 2014

(I worked the morning shift and am due to clock out. One of the other workers has called out, so the only people on duty are me and a manager. Note that this manager is known for shirking her responsibilities and texting instead of working.)

Manager: “[My Name], can you stay a little longer? [Coworker] just called to say she’d be late and I can’t run the store on my own.”

Me: “Sure thing.”

Manager: “Great, thanks!”

(She then proceeded to shut herself in the office – leaving me to run the store on my own.)

Some Strangers Slither Right Up To You

| USA | Friendly | October 31, 2014

(I am buying a guinea pig and am pretty excited. The clerk has gone to get it for me when a woman in her late 50s, a stranger, comes up beside me.)

Strange Woman: “Just bought one?”

Me: *happily* “Yes!”

Strange Woman: “Mmm. I wonder if they’ll… you know… feed them to the snakes?”

Me: “…uh.”

Strange Woman: “I’d feed them to my snakes… if I had some…” *walk away*

Reached Rock-Bottom Dollar

| NC, USA | Right | October 27, 2014

(I’m finishing up a transaction with a customer when she hands me two coupons. I scan the $5 off coupon first, and then the 10% off coupon.)

Me:“Your total comes to [total].”

Customer #1: “YOU JUST CHEATED ME OUT OF A DOLLAR!”

Me: *taken aback* “I’m sorry, what?”

Customer #1: “You scanned the $5 one first, which then lowered the price so the 10 % off comes out to less!”

Me:“Oh, I’m sorry it looks that way. It’s actually just the way our system works. The $5 coupon is seen as a coupon, and not a form of tender. You haven’t actually paid $5, so if I had scanned the 10% one first, once I scanned the $5 one, it would have lowered your discount to the same.”

Customer #1: “No, it wouldn’t have. You’re just making that up. You did that on purpose!”

Me: “Ma’am, I promise you it would have. That’s actually why I did the $5 one first, because I’ve seen it happen, and customers get upset when they see the discount get smaller.”

Customer #1: “Look, I know it’s only $1, but what you’re saying makes no sense. You have no idea what you’re talking about!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’ve been here three years. I can promise you that is what would have happened, However, if you would like, I can call the manager up here to void the transaction and I will do it your way so you can see.”

Customer #1: “No, I don’t have time for that! It’s only $1, but you cheated me. I don’t have time for this!”

(This goes on for a full three minutes of her yelling at me for cheating her out of $1 and me offering to have the transaction voided and her insisting that she doesn’t have time. Finally, a customer at the tag engraving machine decides that he’s had enough.)

Customer #2: “Lady! You keep insisting that it is no big deal and that you don’t have time, but you’ve wasted her time and mine by arguing even though she has offered numerous times to do it your way. I will give you the d*** dollar if it means you will shut the h*** up and just leave!”

Customer #1: *grunts, glares at me and him, RIPS her bags out of my hands, and storms off*

Customer #2: *sighs* “You couldn’t pay me enough to work even one shift for you.”

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