Puppy Purchase Power

| Albuquerque, NM, USA | At The Checkout, Pets & Animals

(I am a customer at a large pet store, waiting in line to buy my cat a new collar. Checking out before me is a man and his very young Husky puppy, who is on the floor while this exchange goes on.)

Cashier: “Okay, so, is this it for you?” *begins scanning various items*

Man: “Yep, I think this is it.”

(Meanwhile, the puppy has gotten himself into a bin of rope toys near the ground, pulling three of them out with his teeth and spinning around with them, having the time of his life.)

Cashier: *looks over the counter at the puppy* “So, did you want a rope toy?”

(The man looks down, seeing the pup surrounded by rope toys, looking very happy with himself.)

Man: *laughs* “Sure, let’s get two of those.”

(The pup got to take one out in his teeth. His cuteness completely made my day!)

A Rock Solid Alternative

| Nanuet, NY, USA | Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals

(I’m the manager and am back in the aquatics department writing up the weekly order of fish when a woman and her two young kids approach me:)

Customer: “How long do these fish live?” *she gestures to a tank full of assorted community fish*

Me: “Usually a few years, ma’am, sometimes longer or shorter, depending on the fish.”

Customer: “And these?” *holds up the betta cup she brought over*

Me: “Bettas generally live up to three years. It’s possible for them to live longer, but it’s uncommon.”

Customer: “How old is this one?”

Me: “I don’t have an exact age, but it’s approximately a year. Baby bettas are very plain, so we don’t sell them because you won’t know what color you’re getting.”

Customer: “How long will this one live, then?”

Me: “Given the average lifespan, about 1 to 2 years.”

Customer: “That’s too short. What do you have that doesn’t die.”

Me: “…Excuse me, ma’am?”

Customer: “I want a pet that doesn’t die. What do you have that doesn’t die?”

Me: “Rocks.”

Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 8

| Seattle, WA, USA | Bizarre, Health & Body

(An elderly woman has asked me to grab a large bag of dog food off the floor for her. As I am walking over to retrieve it, this conversation happens.)

Elderly Woman: “Oh, no, dear, I didn’t mean you grab it. Just get one of the nice young men to grab it for me.”

Me: “It’s no problem at all, ma’am! I assure you I lift these bags all the time!”

Elderly Woman: “Oh. you shouldn’t do that! What about the baby?!”

Me: “Oh! Oh, no, I am sorry for the confusion. I’m not pregnant, ma’am.”

Elderly Woman: “But someday you could be! You don’t want to risk it!”

Me: “I assure you, if I am ever pregnant, I won’t lift anything. For the mean time I am perfectly capable of lifting the bag for you. I promise.”

(I lifted the bag and brought it to the register, rang her out, and then carried it to her car. As I was walking away I heard her shouting ‘you make sure you take care of that baby!’ Now, whenever I go to lift anything, my coworkers tell me to make sure ‘not to hurt the baby!’)

Related:
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 7
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 6
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 5