To Undoodle A Poodle

, , , , | Right | October 18, 2018

(A woman brings in her dog to get groomed. The dog is a Goldendoodle, a cross between a Golden Retriever and a Poodle.)

Me: “So, what would you like to do for her haircut today?”

Customer: “I don’t want her to look too much like a Poodle.”

Me: “Well, your dog is half Poodle, but I’ll see what we can do.”

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That’s Exactly What “Expired” Means

, , , , , | Right | October 2, 2018

(I work in the grooming salon at a popular pet supply store. It’s a fairly normal day, not too busy, so when a walk-in comes in I’m more than happy to help. The salon requires all pets over four months of age to have updated rabies vaccinations for any and all services; if the rabies vaccines have expired or aren’t in our system yet, we require pet parents to bring proof of rabies paperwork. For legal purposes, a rabies tag isn’t acceptable for documentation.)

Me: “All right, it says here that your dog’s rabies vaccines expired in May of last year. If those vaccinations are up to date now, we’ll need proof of rabies paperwork before we can get him checked in.”

Customer: “Well, they should be all up to date. I didn’t bring paperwork with me. I’ve never been asked for it before.”

(This is clearly not true, since the past vaccine dates are in the system. Nonetheless, I offer to call her vet’s office to get verbal confirmation over the phone. I’m on hold for about fifteen minutes, which is fine, but at the end the vet just confirms that the rabies shots have not been administered since last time and the dogs are overdue by a year. I tell the woman this.)

Customer: *getting visibly angry* “No, they’re not expired! I just have to get them done again! So, what, because those shots aren’t up to date, he just has rabies now? This is bulls***! I’ve never been asked for rabies paperwork before! If you change your policies, you need to tell your customers! You know what? We’ll see about this!”

(She marched out of the salon and into the store. When my salon manager got to work that day, she told me that the woman had bypassed speaking to a store manager and actually called corporate to complain. Nothing came of it; the policy’s always been that way. I was just doing my job.)

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Groomed For Disappointment

, , , | Right | August 29, 2018

(I work as a mobile pet groomer. A client leaves this message on the phone on a Tuesday.)

Client: “Hi, I’m new and from [City]. I have a Schnauzer and a Shih-Tzu that need grooming; it’s been a while. I’m not working this summer and am very open for times, so your soonest available appointment.”

Me: *calling back that afternoon* “Hi, I’m just getting back to you after you left us a message. We do have an opening due to a cancellation this Friday afternoon.”

Client: “Oh, yeah, Friday isn’t good for me. Do you have anything sooner, even if it’s just one dog?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but this Friday is the soonest opening, and the next is in July.”

(July is over two weeks away.)

Client: “Well, that’s too far out! I’ll just have to get him groomed somewhere else; I need this week, but not Friday, or this weekend, but not tomorrow. Bye.”

(She wanted in right away — which rarely happens for mobile grooming — and she wasn’t really free, and it was not even really summer yet… She never asked the prices, either.)

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Groomed For Failure

, , , , , , | Working | July 19, 2018

Around last Christmas at the pet salon I manage, we hired a new groomer. At first, things go well; she gets along with everyone she works with and customers like her work. But as the new year gets going, things start to go downhill. We end up being lucky if a single week goes by without her calling out of work at least once, as supposedly none of her children or her boyfriend can go seven days in a row without being “seriously” ill. Even when the boyfriend is healthy and the children are ill, he never seems to be able to watch them, despite not having a job.

Eventually, though she never says anything to me directly, she tells some of her coworkers that she’s planning on putting in a two-week notice soon, and not really a two-week notice, as she’s actually planning on working one week and taking Paid Time Off for the second week.

About a week before she’s supposedly going to hand in her notice, the useless girl basically decides to clock out for lunch and then never come back, without telling anyone anything. We know nothing until her next appointment arrives and is waiting for her, so we contact her to see how much longer she’s going to be on lunch. She then claims her boyfriend is in the emergency room — quelle surprise — and that she’s not coming back for the rest of the day, again without telling anybody beforehand or making any arrangements to have her appointments cancelled or rescheduled.

That’s when she finally says to me personally that she’s quitting and, despite the fact that she has appointments for the next day, she is only coming back in to collect her tools and equipment and leave. She does manage to get one thing accomplished before she leaves: putting in a request for a week’s worth of PTO, a request that I promptly deny. It wouldn’t really have mattered, anyway, since her termination was official before the PTO would have taken affect.

The kicker, though, is that when she was interviewed, she stated upfront that she would not accept the position unless it was for 40 hours a week, which we agreed to, but then she never worked that many hours a week. And she stated that the reason she was leaving was because she “couldn’t make it here” and that she wasn’t making enough money. No kidding. If you don’t bring your butt into work, not only will you be making less hourly pay, but customers then won’t know if their dog is actually going to get groomed at that appointment time. If they don’t know their dog is going to get groomed, then they’re going to stop scheduling grooms with you. Then you’re going to have less commission, as well. It’s no wonder the girl “couldn’t make it.”

She claims she found a better paying job elsewhere. One can only hope her family manages to find a way to stay healthy for longer periods of time, or else I don’t see how her new job is going to help her out much. Such a pity. She’s the only pet groomer I’ve ever seen who somehow had trouble filling up her schedule with groom dogs on a Saturday, the single busiest day of the week at the salon.

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When The Yelper Got Yelped

, , | Legal | July 1, 2018

(A new potential client texts:)

Potential Client: “I want to get my dog groomed this Saturday.”

Groomer: “Thank you for your interest; currently we are booked until [date out three weeks]. Can I get more information on your dog?”

Potential Client: “If you don’t get me in this Saturday I’m going to post on every review site every day!”

Groomer: “Sorry, we don’t groom for terrorists and any libel will be dealt with by my lawyer.”

(The groomer then screen-shot the texts and shared with local and national groomer groups online to blacklist him.)

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