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Persistent Puppy Love

, , , , , | Right | June 1, 2018

(I work the front desk of a small pet day care and boarding facility. Most of the dogs who are dropped off for “dog day care” are regulars, and are pretty comfortable and used to everything. Sometimes people who have a puppy or their first dog can be more nervous, and they want to make sure their dog is okay and will call during the day to check up on their pet. This is the fourth time today that this particular woman has called to check up on her dog.)

Me: *answering phone* “Hello, how may I help you?”

Customer: “Hi, this is [Customer] again.”

Me: “Hi, [Customer]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I am calling to check up on [Dog] again because I am a crazy dog mom!

Customers Can Be A Strange Breed

, , , , | Right | March 29, 2018

(I work at a dog kennel. I am helping my manager work the front desk when a man walks in with a large dog. We are at 100% capacity, so we know he is a walk-in. My manager goes right over to head off any tantrums that might be coming.)

Manager: “I’m sorry, sir, but we are completely full at the moment. If you want to put your name on the waiting list, however, we will call you as soon as there is room.”

Man: “Oh, no, I’m not looking to board my dog; I’m looking to breed him.”

Manager: *confused* “I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t breed dogs here. This is a kennel.”

Man: *clearly not listening* “I want to breed my dog. He’s a purebred.”

Manager: “Sir, again, we don’t breed dogs here.”

Man: “Why not? He’s had all his shots and he’s a purebred!”

Manager: “Sir, again, we don’t breed dogs here, because these dogs do not belong to us. These dogs all belong to other people and they’d be very upset if we let your dog mate with their pet.”

Man: *sounding desperate* “You don’t understand! You could make a lot of money selling the puppies; this is a good deal!”

Manager: *totally fed up* “A good deal is not getting sued by an angry owner. Please leave; I have a line of actual customers waiting.”

(The man leaves with his dog, looking pretty dejected, but doesn’t try to argue further. Half an hour later, one of my coworkers who wasn’t there for the strange man answers the phone.)

Coworker: “Hello, this is [Kennel]. How can I help you today?”

(I can’t hear the other half of the conversation, but my coworker starts making this really confused face.)

Coworker: “I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t breed dogs here.”

Manager: *furious* “Oh, my God! [Coworker], hang up the d*** phone.” *turning to me* “If he calls back again, I’m going to neuter them both!”

Unable To Sink Their Canines Into Your Business

, , , , | Right | January 25, 2018

(I work at a pet boarding facility which sells dog food on the side; it is not a money maker, just a convenience service. A client calls and asks if he can purchase a big bag of dog food WHILE WE ARE CLOSED. The employee who answers the call gives him the hours that we are open, during which he can buy his dog food. Said client throws a hissy fit because, “how DARE we say no? He is the CUSTOMER.” A few days later, he is in with his dog and he launches into me.)

Client: “You know, I came on Sunday and tried to buy food while you guys were closed, and your staff told me no. That is obviously how you train your staff to treat clients, so I will no longer be purchasing my food from you.”

Me: “Uh, okay. We were closed at the time, so…”

Client: “The lady I talk to knows full well how to operate the front and sell food, so don’t try to give me the excuse that she was just a tech!”

Me: “I’m sorry about that, but, I mean, we were closed at the time, so—”

Client: “It’s really too bad. It’s such an inconvenience for me to have to go elsewhere to get my dog’s food now, since you will no longer be receiving my business.”

Me: “Okay… How about I go get your dog now?”

(This client is still a heavy user of our services that actually make us money, dropping $300+ a month. The only thing he stopped doing was purchasing the product we literally ONLY carry as a convenience for our clients, and he regularly complains to us about how he “has to” go so far out of his way to get his dog’s food now, because we would not drop everything and open exclusively for him.)

Like A Dog To A Bone

, , | Right | January 1, 2018

(I work in the reception of a dogs’ home. I have been told to blacklist a woman who has been found to have mistreated her pets to the point that two have died, and the remaining one has been taken away. We hear she has been blacklisted in her local area, and has now travelled further out to a completely different county to acquire a pet. The vet who works with us spots her in the car park and warns everyone. She comes in, waves to us quickly, knocks over a volunteer, and runs straight into the kennels before we can really do anything. The vet and I follow her.)

Me: “Excuse me, are you [Woman]?”

Woman: “Yes! I want this golden retriever, and this Chihuahua, please. I don’t care about vaccinations or insurance. Oh, and this—”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

Woman: “No, I’m here to get a pet, you see. My last one died unexpectedly.”

Vet: “Yes, we are aware.”

Woman: “What?”

Vet: “We know about your last three pets, and the neglect you showed them. We have decided to blacklist you. You aren’t allowed to adopt here.”

Woman: “Humph! You care more about a mangy mutt than my happiness?”

Me: “Yes, we care more about the lives you’ve been ruining, in particular the lives that have ended under your care.”

Woman: “That’s a terrible business plan. The customer is always right! If you aren’t willing to take my money, I will go elsewhere.” *storms out*

Me: “God, I hope she never gets another pet again.”

Vet: “She probably will. She’ll move to a catchment area that hasn’t been informed, and she’ll start over again. People like that don’t care.”

(We heard later that she had visited almost every dogs’ home in the county, before moving on. She’s relentless.)

A Place Where Your Pet Can Stretch Its Leg

, , , , , , | Working | November 29, 2017

(My mother and I are dropping off our cat at a boarding place, and we are asked to fill out a sheet describing her physical well-being, noting things such as her allergies. We are almost finished.)

Me: “Don’t forget the leg.”

(My cat had her back leg amputated at a young age.)

Mom: “Of course.”

(She writes it down on the sheet. Just then, my small cat squeezes out of her carrier and starts limping across the tile floor. We catch her, place her back in her carrier, and hand the sheet to the woman behind the counter. She scans the sheet.)

Woman: “Oh, [Cat] has three legs?”

Mom: “Yes.”

Woman: “You know, I thought she had an odd gait. That would explain it.”

Mom: “…”