He Pried To Get A Rise Out Of You

, , , | Right | June 17, 2021

My store opens at 9:00 am, but the staff is there early to do opening tasks. We have staggered shifts so not everyone comes and goes at once; the front door is not locked so that the staff can come in when they arrive, but the automatic sensor is turned off. Most of our customers know that if the automatic sliding door doesn’t open, we aren’t open.

We are in our morning meeting when there is a loud knock at the door. We all look to see a man standing outside. The store manager goes to the door but does not open it.

Store Manager: “Hi, can I help you?”

Customer: “What are you doing?”

Store Manager: “Just having our morning meeting. The store doesn’t—”

Customer: “Why is this locked?”

Store Manager: “We don’t actually open for another hour.”

Customer: “I hate this store anyway.” *Stomps off*

Store Manager: *To the team* “Okay, so… back to business.”

Half an hour later, we are doing our opening tasks when the same man walks up behind me.

Customer: “Hey!”

He pokes me twice in the lower back as he speaks. Startled, I drop a glass jar.

Me: “Oh f—” *realizing he’s a customer* “—fffffudge.”

Customer: “Where is everyone?”

Me: *Looking at my watch* “Sir, we don’t open for another half-hour.”

Customer: “Meet me at the checkout.” *Walks away*

I walk off to find my manager in the office.

Me: “Hey, that guy you turned away is back.”

Store Manager: “Tell him we don’t open until nine.”

Me: “Yeah, he’s in the store. He came up behind me and I dropped a glass bottle, which I have to clean up, too.”

Store Manager: *Frustrated sigh* “Why did you let him in?”

Me: “I didn’t.”

Store Manager: “Well… fine. I’ll open a register early, but you can take care of him.”

Me: *Knowing how this will go* “Thanks.”

I clean up the broken glass and meet the man at the register. He has a single small jar of mayonnaise in his hand.

Customer: “Took you long enough.”

Me: “I had to clean up the glass I dropped when you poked me.”

Customer: *Shrugs* “You were no help anyway.”

Me: “Well, sir, as I said, we open at nine.”

Customer: “Then why were the doors open?”

Me: “To allow our staff to come in.”

Customer: “Stupid.”

Me: “Okay. Your total is $2.12.”

He hands me a $100 bill.

Me: “I can’t break that, I’m sorry.”

Customer: “You can and you will. It’s your job.”

Me: *Frustrated* “We aren’t even open yet and you’re trying to give me a $100 bill for a $2 sale? No, I’m not dealing with this.”

We stare at each other for a moment before he puts the bill away.

Customer: “F*** you.”

He left without the mayonnaise.

He called the store later that day to make a complaint, claiming I opened the door for him and harassed him. The store manager checked the video and saw that he’d pried the doors open himself and walked up to me. I didn’t get in trouble for talking to him that way, but we did change the policy to locking the front door before opening. Now one of us has to stop what we’re doing when team members knock, but at least customers can’t let themselves in.

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Judging You By A Hidden Yard-Stick

, , , , , | Right | June 11, 2021

Me: “Hello, what can I help you find?”

Customer: “Yes, I need some chicken wire for my yard.”

Me: “Okay, follow me and I’ll show you where it is.”

We get to the chicken wire.

Customer: “I need enough that will cover my yard.”

Me: “Okay, do you know how big your yard is?”

Customer: “No! You work here. Shouldn’t you know how big my yard is and how much I’ll need?”

Me: “Sir, I’ve never been to your house to see your yard, so I don’t know how much you’ll need.”

Customer: “Well, I’ll just buy two rolls, and if it isn’t enough, I will be back and tell your boss to get you fired since you obviously don’t do your job right.”

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Laziness Is More Widespread Than You-Know-What

, , , , , , , | Working | June 9, 2021

I’m a supervisor at a movie theater. We’ve just reopened about two months ago after being closed due to the health crisis. We hired four teenagers with our new group of hires about a month and a half ago. I get a call one Saturday afternoon. It’s one of the teenagers who’s supposed to work the night shift.

Me: “Hello, is there an issue?”

Employee: *Obviously fake sick voice* “Ugh… I can’t make it in. I think I have [widespread illness].”

Me: “Okay. Did you find a replacement to come in for you?”

Employee: “Ugh. No.”

Me: “Okay, if you really think you can’t come in, stay home.”

Employee: “Ugh. Thanks.”

Me: “I’ll see you in two weeks.”

Employee: “Two weeks?”

Me: “Well, if you think you have [illness], I’m not scheduling you until either you quarantine for two weeks or you bring in a negative [illness] test to show me.”

Employee: “Ummm…”

Me: “Unless you want to tell me the truth.”

Employee: *Alarmed* “UMMMM…”

Me: “You don’t really think you have [illness], do you?”

Employee: *Defeated* “No.”

Me: “You feel totally fine and just don’t want to work tonight, right?”

Employee: *Sheepishly* “How did you know?”

Me: “Because this is the fourth week in a row one of you newbies has called off on a Saturday night claiming that you think you have [illness]. And every single one of you has been surprised when we tell you that you either have to quarantine or bring in a negative test to show us. You knew you’d have to work weekends. You can either show up to work tonight or you can just not show up at all in the future.”

Employee: “I’ll be in at five.”

Me: “I thought so.”

Seriously… all four transparently tried the same stunt, for four weeks in a row.

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From Off The Shelf To Straight Down Your Throat

, , , , , | Right | June 8, 2021

I work in a high-end department store. As such, customers can be a little… particular. This is fine, though, as we are used to it and can handle it well. One woman comes in and chooses some very expensive sunglasses. This happens as I’m checking her out.

Customer: “And I would like a fresh pair from the back.”

Me: “Of course, ma’am. Let me go check that we have them.”

I go through our stock, but the only extra pair is also out on the shelf. I bring the extra pair to the register in case she likes the condition of these more. But before I can get a word in, she barks at me:

Customer: “I just saw what you did! You just took those off the shelf!”

Me: “I did, ma’am. These are the only two pairs I have left, but we can easily order you a brand new one if you like.”

Customer: *Grumbles* “Fine, order it.”

I cancel the transaction and start an order when she suddenly speaks up again.

Customer: “No. You know what? Cancel everything. I don’t want them. I saw what you did. I won’t take a used pair!”

She stormed off. I assume she thought I was trying to pass the other pair off as the new pair, but she jumped down my throat before I could explain and then didn’t seem to believe me anyway when I did. Some people can never be pleased.

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Training Good Boys Doesn’t Exempt You From The Bad Ones

, , , , | Right | June 4, 2021

I train dogs for a chain pet store. The training arena is in the back corner of the building. It has a solid three-foot wall and another three feet of plexiglass above that with a solid door to enter or exit. People often stand outside and watch. Unless they seem to be recording or taking photos of the class, this is totally fine. I am teaching one of my beginner classes when a student interrupts me.

Student: “Hey, [My Name], there’s a guy out there.”

She points behind me. A phone is visible through the plexiglass beside the door. As soon as I open the door, the guy puts his phone down, still pointing the camera toward the arena. He’s wearing a baseball cap, sunglasses, a hoodie, and jeans, and he won’t look directly at me. Everything about him makes me suspect he is up to something, but I still maintain a professional attitude.

Me: “Hello. How can I help you?”

Man: *Defensive* “I’m just getting some tips.”

I smile, gesturing at the phone in his hand.

Me: “I’m sorry, it’s against policy to allow—”

He not-so-subtly tilts his phone so the camera is pointed up at me.

Man: “I’m not hurting anyone by standing out here.”

I move my hand so it’s covering his camera’s view.

Me: “Sir, I’m going to have to insist you leave.”

Man: *Stepping into the arena* “This is a public building! I am an American citizen and I have the right—”

Student: “Dude, get out of here!”

The student stood and approached the man quickly and he left. Later that same shift, a manager approached and asked my side of the story.

According to the man, I cussed him out, insulted and made fun of him, and then tried to bully him into paying me directly instead of enrolling in the class. I told her what actually happened and which class it was if she wanted to contact the other students or watch the security cameras.

She called every one of my students and they all told the same story I did. The man came back a few days later, smugly expecting compensation for how disrespectful I had been. The manager silently stared at him until he left.

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