She’s Not Being Very Hip

, , , , , | Healthy | December 2, 2019

My great aunt gets a call from a friend asking her if she wants to go grocery shopping at a popular bulk warehouse store and my aunt agrees. When her friend gets to the house, my aunt goes outside and slips on some ice in the driveway; she hits her hip hard and can no longer stand up. She refuses to call an ambulance, and two of her neighbors manage to get her into her friend’s car. 

My aunt’s friend asks if she wants to go to the doctor right away but my aunt responds, “No, you came to go to the store so we might as well do that first.” So, her friend goes grocery shopping while my aunt stays in the car with a broken hip. Afterward, the friend insists my aunt go to a doctor. Instead of going to the emergency room, my aunt insists on going to a faster care doctor’s office. 

They pull into the parking lot and my aunt’s friend explains the situation. A doctor comes out and tells my aunt they have no way to get her out of the car — she is somewhat of a larger lady — and that she really needs to go to the ER. My aunt complains. Finally, the doctor says, “Ma’am, you’ve broken your hip. This is something outside of our control. We can help you if you need something minor, but you are going to need surgery; you need to leave and go get the care you need.” 

She finally agrees to go to the ER and she ends up having quite the lengthy recovery process because she is just as difficult in her physical therapy appointments.

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Just For That, We’re Adding An Hour  

, , , , | Right | November 26, 2019

(I’m the assistant manager of an auto repair shop. A regular customer of mine calls on a Saturday afternoon, one of our busiest days of the week.)

Customer: “Hi, [My Name], I just bought a new car. Is there any way I can bring it in today for an inspection?”

Me: “Is it a new, new car? How many miles are on it?”

(If the car is brand new, it will typically take a lot less time.)

Customer: “No, it’s a 2017; I think there’s about 49,000 on it.”

Me: “Okay, if you can bring it down soon and drop it off with us, we can get it done today, but we’ll need to keep it for at least a few hours. Of course, we can get you a ride home and pick you up when it’s done.”

Customer: “All right, I’ll be there soon.”

(When he shows up to drop the car off, I am not at the counter, and he talks to our general manager.)

Customer: “Do you think this is going to take long?”

General Manager: “Well, [My Name] said you were going to drop it off, right?”

Customer: “Yeah, but I’m pretty sure she said it would only be an hour to an hour and a half.”

General Manager: *who had been standing three feet away when I took the customer’s call* “I’m sorry, but I’m pretty sure she told you at least a few hours. Let me get you that shuttle ride home.”

(It amazes me how many people try things like that; do they really think we don’t talk to each other?)

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Unfiltered Story #178374

, , | Unfiltered | November 26, 2019

I work in a very well-known office supply store, albeit one in a rather small city. I am walking over to the copy area, and on my way pass a woman carrying two flat-pack cardboard boxes and a roll of tape. When I reach the copy area, I answer a phone call almost immediately and am on the phone only about two minutes. After ending the call, I look towards the register and see that the cashier has a small line of about three customers. Our policy is not to have more than two customers in any line at any time, so I head over to help her out. I call the woman with the boxes over to my register.
Woman: About f****** time! I’ve been struggling to hold this s***.
Me: *shocked* I’m sorry about that…
Woman: Every f******* time I come in here you idiots p*** me off!
Me: *staring at the raving woman, talking slowly and evenly* …Do you have a rewards card?
Woman: No I don’t have a f****** rewards card. I hate this f****** place! I go to *other stores in our chain* and there’s never a problem! I come here and there’s no one to help me, and four people standing around talking about hardware! (Note: including the manager, there are only five employees in the entire store, one at the copy area, one at the tech area, the other cashier, the manager who I haven’t seen, and myself, so I’m not sure who she’s referring to.) Thank God I’m leaving this r***** town and moving to Arizona, which is why I’m even here buying these stupid boxes! I’ve been waiting in line for ten goddamned minutes! (Really only about three)
Me: I’m sorry that the other employees were tied up with customers-
Woman: You’re wasting your breath because I’m not even f****** listening to you anymore!
Me: *deciding to stay silent at this point, as she viciously swipes her card in the credit machine, which, of course, decides to not process her card.
Woman: This is ridiculous! Why the f*** is this taking so long?
Me: The machine times out sometimes, you’ll have to try again-
Woman: Get me someone over here who knows what the f*** they’re doing!
Me: please swipe your card again.
Woman: *does so, all while still spitting her bile the whole time* Why the f*** do they have idiots who don’t know what they’re doing working here? This is taking forever! Get me a f****** manager!
Me: *Speaking very slowly as if to a rampaging animal* Ma’mn there is no one who can make the computer go faster. It’s going to take as long as it takes. You need to select if you want cash back.
Woman: *still raving at me once again turns her attention from the directions on the pin pad to abuse me*
Me: it’s asking you if the amount is correct.
Woman: *stabs the pin pad with the stylus like she’s trying to murder it* God! Get me someone who knows what they’re doing already!
Me: *hands her the receipt that has just printed* It’s finished. You’re all done.
Woman: *grabs her tape and screams* A******! *She begins to storm out of the store, still ranting and raving.
Me: Ma’mn…
Woman: *turns around like she’s going to rush me*
Me: *holding out her boxes* Do you want these?
Woman: *grabs them and stomps out of the store.*
Cashier: What on earth was that about!?
Me: *throws up my hands in a shrug* I guess she was upset about waiting in line for three minutes…
Woman: *Sees my gesture from outside the store and flips me off through the window before disappearing*
I had to laugh about it, it was too ridiculous to bear. Other customers had been watching the whole time and began commenting on how outrageously she had behaved. All I can say is ‘Good luck, Arizona.’

Working Morning Is A Ride

, , , | Right | November 25, 2019

(This story takes place at around 10:00 am during my 8:00 am to 5:00 pm shift. A customer has just walked in the doors. I’m 17 years old and a part-time cashier, so I don’t normally work a morning shift.)

Me: “Hi, how are you today?”

Customer: “Hi, do you need a ride home today?”

Me: “Um, no.”

Customer: “Well, okay. I need help with hardware.”

(I send my manager back with the customer. I turn to my coworker.)

Coworker: “Do you know him?”

Me: “No, I’ve never seen him before.”

(My coworker decides to go out to the parking lot and take a look at the car windshields to see if any of the cars have any indication that they are Uber drivers because I have to take quite a few Ubers to and from work. She comes back in with no luck. The customer comes back up a few minutes later and since I’m with another customer, he walks to my coworker’s register. As he’s leaving, the customer turns to me.)

Customer: “I’m keeping my eyes on you.”

(I’ve told my two managers, but I haven’t seen the customer since. Needless to say, I always have pepper spray on me now, just in case.)

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‘Cause You’re Hot Then You’re Cold, You’re Yes Then You’re No

, , , , | Right | November 23, 2019

(I’m a few customers behind a very well-dressed family — mom, dad, and teenager — at one of those pizza places where you can add whatever toppings you want for the same price and they bake it while you wait. While mine is waiting to go in the oven, theirs comes out.)

Teen: *smelling her pizza after it is cut* “Oh, my God, I can’t eat this; it stinks!”

Employee: “You had me put Gorgonzola cheese on it, which is quite fragrant.”

Mom: “She wanted normal pizza cheese. You should have known she meant mozzarella, not gorgonzola.”

Employee: “I’m sorry, we have many customers who like gorgonzola. I just put on whatever she told me to. I will gladly remake it with mozzarella if you would like. Here are your other two pizzas.”

Mom: “You don’t expect my husband and I to eat while our little girl has nothing?”

Employee: “Okay, well, we can keep them under the heat lamps, or I can put them back in the oven, but they’ll get darker if I put them back in the oven.”

Mom: “No. Who wants burnt pizza?”

Employee: “Heat lamps it is.”

(Less than five minutes later, the new pizza is done, pulled smoking hot from the oven.)

Mom: “Now hers is hot but ours are cold!”

Employee: “I assure you, they are still plenty warm. Just because they aren’t smoking like the one fresh from the oven, it does not mean they are cold.”

Mom: “This is horrible service. I demand a refund. Get your manager!”

(The manager comes out and reluctantly gives them a refund, but of course, they’ve thrown out the receipt so he has to go back through the computer to find the amount of the sale, all of which time all three pizzas are sitting under the heat lamps.)

Manager: “Would you still like your pizzas?”

Mom: “Absolutely, we are starving!”

(They proceed to eat every bit of their “cold” pizzas.)

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