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OFF WITH THEIR HEADS

, , , | Right | February 21, 2022

I sold Halloween costumes at a party store years ago. A customer came up with a Queen of Hearts costume that sells for $80.

Me: “I notice that this is ringing in as an eight-pack of camouflage party cups for $1.29. Know anything about that?”

They bolted.

Getting Owned By The Owner, Part 18

, , , , , , | Working | November 15, 2021

I’m picking up a few things for my daughter’s birthday. I’ve made an order and I’m collecting it.

Cashier: “Will that be all?”

Me: “Oh, yes. [Owner] said there was some of stock being thrown out and I could help myself.”

Cashier: “There is no [Owner] that works here.”

Me: “Yes, there is. [Owner], the owner.”

Cashier: “The owner is [Woman]. You can’t have stuff for free.”

Me: “Why don’t I call him?”

I get my phone and dial the number right there.

Me: “Oh, hi, [Owner]. I’m in the shop and they don’t know anything about the stuff you said.” *Pauses* “Her name is… [Cashier]. She said she doesn’t even know you.” *Pauses* “Okay, great. See you in a second.”

Cashier: “You know what? I’ve really had it with customers trying to rip us off. I will call the owner and they will ban you from the store.”

Just then, [Owner] arrives from the back.

Owner: “I don’t think that will be necessary. Sorry about her, [My Name]. She’s been here six months and I’m here all the time. You would think she would know who I am by now.”

Cashier: “But [Woman] said—”

Owner: “[Woman] is the manager. I am the owner. I did explain this.” *Sighs* “Why don’t you restock the shelves while I serve this gentleman?”

He did, and he gave me a bit of a discount, too. When I left, I saw the cashier outside instead of stacking the shelves, smoking a cigarette. I wonder how long she stayed.

Related:
Getting Owned By The Owner, Part 17
Getting Owned By The Owner, Part 16
Getting Owned By The Owner, Part 15
Getting Owned By The Owner, Part 14
Getting Owned By The Owner, Part 13

Wish They Could “Ignore” Customers Like Them

, , , , , , | Right | October 30, 2020

I work in a party supply store. I’m helping a group consisting of two women, two teenagers, and three children pick out costumes for everyone but the women. The teens are able to decide quickly but the kids, being kids, keep changing their minds.

I get the costumes for the teens, bring them back, and let the group know to get my attention whenever they’ve decided.

So I’m not hovering over them, I busy myself with straightening up the shelves a bit down the aisle. I finish one and I’m about to start on another when I hear a voice speak up.

Customer: “So they pay you to ignore people?”

I look up to see that a new lady has joined them and see the reactions of the group itself standing behind her: one teen is actually facepalming while one woman is shaking her head in what I assume to be exasperation.

I barely process her comment before she makes another one.

Customer: “You must be seasonal or somethin’; you look slow.”

The group stares at her in shock and I’m very glad my mask hides my expression. I turn to the rest of the group, remind them to let me know whenever the kids have decided, and walk further down the aisle away from them.

For the next fifteen minutes, I’m busy helping other customers, but the woman keeps spotting me in the few seconds afterward, and every time, she makes a rude comment about me doing nothing or being slow.

As the kids finally decide their costumes and I hand them off to their moms, she comments:

Customer: “Looks like you’re finally working.”

I bite my tongue and walk away. As I get to the end of the aisle, I hear one of the other ladies yell:

Customer’s Friend: “Why are you like this every time we shop?!”

That Was Majorette Strange

, , , , | Right | May 13, 2019

(A customer and her boyfriend have gone back and forth in the store, laughing and joking. Suddenly, they both come up to the counter to my manager.)

Customer: “Excuse me. Have I been here before?”

Manager: “No, not that I know of.”

Customer: “Have you and I ever met?”

Manager: “No.”

Customer: *to my coworker and me* “What about you two?”

Us: “No.”

Customer: “Right. Now, tell me that a camo-themed birthday wouldn’t be cute for a girl. She could be a majorette.”

Boyfriend: “We ain’t having no majorette party.”

Customer: “If you can spell ‘majorette,’ then we won’t do it. Can you spell majorette?”

Boyfriend: *suddenly angry* “I can spell ‘kiss my a**’!” *storms out to be followed by his laughing girlfriend*

Manager: “Did that really just happen?”

The Kind Of Man That Puts Monetary Value On Women

, , , | Right | May 8, 2019

(I work at a store that mostly sells pranks and novelty items, and the staff often jokes around with customers. An older man has come in and I am quickly able to help him find the item that he is looking for. We have two counters in our store — one up front and one in the back — but our only register is at the front counter. We are located at the back counter, and the man has remained quiet the whole time, and before I can direct him up front, he silently shoves a hundred dollar bill in my face.)

Me: “Actually, sir, we’ll need to check out up front, but I’ll be happy to take that bill off your hands!” *laughs*

Customer: *completely somber, putting the bill back into his wallet* “It’s just like a woman to ask for money and take it.”

Me: “Um… Let’s go get you checked out.”