No Good Hug Goes Unpunished

| Friendly | March 24, 2014

(While studying abroad in England, we came across a sad-looking man holding a ‘Free Hugs’ sign. Feeling sorry for him because he looked lonely, I gave him a hug. Unfortunately, once he had his arms around me, he wouldn’t let go.)

Free Hugs Guy: “Mmm, you’re nice. You smell nice… like pink soap!” *begins trying to tickle me*

Me: “Um, sir, please let go of me. No, seriously. Let go now. Guys?! A little help?!”

(My friends are crying because they’re laughing so hard.)

Friend: “I am instagramming this right now. We’ll see who still has a boyfriend when she gets back to the States!”

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Putting The Relation Into Relationship, Part 6

| Right | June 20, 2013

(My boyfriend and I are going shopping for my brother’s seventh birthday. A middle age customer walks up to us.)

Customer: “Aww, isn’t that cute?”

Me: “What is?”

Customer: “Brother and sister shopping together. You both look like twins!”

(My boyfriend laughs.)

Me: “Sorry, but we aren’t related at all. We’re dating; you know, boyfriend and girlfriend.”

Customer: “No, you’re not! You haven’t held hands or hugged each other. Show me!”

Boyfriend: “Well, let’s not keep her waiting…”

(I give him a kiss, which throws the customer into a rage.)



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