The ‘South Park’ movie has just come out in theaters, including the theater where I am working. There is no single, key, specific bad customer here; just countless under-age kids trying to sneak in, to the point where corporate office sent a notation that all theaters must post someone inside the door for every showing.
I am the youngest employee, and in fact, one of the only ones who is not old enough to be a parent or grandparent.
As everyone else on the staff actively dislikes South Park, three guesses as to who gets stationed to stand just inside the entry to that theater, day after day, eight hour shift after eight hour shift.
Without meaning to, I have memorized much of the d*** film and can quote dialogue verbatim. Kind of ruined the show for me, and set me on the path of hating bratty, entitled customers. I also heard of a guy at another theater doing the same job who got maced for not letting a middle-school kid into the movie when she tried to sneak in.
(It is fall so it’s chilly but not freezing outside.)
Me: *wearing muscle shirt and shorts*
Customer: “You must be warm blooded!”
(I’m picking up my son from elementary school when he asks for ice cream. The man selling outside is in his 50s-60s and pushing an ice cream cart in 100+ degree weather. There’s a 10 year old boy with his 5 year old sister ahead of us.)
Girl: “I want that one”
Boy: “How much is that?”
Ice cream Man: “$1.50”
Boy: *to sister* “We only have two dollars.”
Sister: “I want that one.”
(She points to another that also turns out to be $1.50, this goes on for another three times until the man finally sells them for $1 instead of $1.50.)
Boy: “I’ll take two.”
(The man’s expression seems like he can’t afford to lose a penny but he gives it to them anyway.)
Son: “I’ll take that one.”
Ice Cream Man: “That’s $1.00.”
(I hand him $3.00 and tell him it’s to cover the kids in front of us. The man seems so relieved it made me wish I had more change.)
(Our beach normally has a 15-minute swim break to clear the water to make sure no one is missing, and to allow the lifeguards a short break. Today is incredibly busy and hot, and we are extremely understaffed since most of the college students have returned to school. The manager has just announced a 30-minute swim break. I am at the beach gate, where we collect the entrance fees.)
Woman: *in a rude tone* “Who just made that announcement? Where is that person?”
Me: “The beach manager. They are in the lifeguard office. Is there something I can help you with?”
Woman: “What do they mean a 30-minute swim break?! That’s ridiculous!”
Me: “Well, we always have a 15-minute swim break, but today they are extending it to 30 minutes for a few reasons. For one, since there are so many people it takes more time to clear the water. Also, we are understaffed today and have already had one lifeguard go home sick. The longer break allows the lifeguards time for a break so they can be focused when they go on the stands.”
Woman: “This is insane! I can’t believe this place! How inconsiderate!” *storms off*
I Have A Sinking Feeling
(We are having an annual Christmas parade. It blocks a lot of traffic for about an hour. A driver pulls up to me.)
Driver: “Excuse me. I need to drive through here. I need to get out to go do some business.”
Me: “Sorry. The parade is going on right now. You can go the other direction but it’s not safe for you to go this way.”
Driver: “I have a business to run. This is a business street. If you guys want to have fun you need to go find a fun street and not have fun on our business street!”